Pies That Kill

Thanksgiving is as much about food as it is about family, and around many dinner tables next week dessert will be the king course. That means ovens across the country will be stuffed with pies of all stripes, from mincemeat to cherry to pumpkin to coconut cream.

Of course, chains like Perkins Family Restaurant would prefer to bake your family’s pies for you. And families that lack a star baker may very well take them up on their offer. With that in mind, The Daily Beast decided to take a look at which pies to avoid this Thanksgiving, and beyond. Beware—a single serving of some of these pies may have more calories than an entire Thanksgiving feast.

To find the most indulgent desserts for the upcoming holiday season, The Daily Beast collected nutrition data on more than 40 pies from 17 national restaurant chains (many chains, of course, do not offer pies, while restaurants like Perkins specialize). We ran the nutritional-value numbers across the four categories available for each eatery: calories, saturated fat, sodium, and carbohydrates. Adjusting our methodology slightly to achieve greater accuracy, we compared each pie’s individual statistics against the average for each category. Each chain was limited to six items on this list.

#1, Ice Cream Mud Pie

Elephant Bar

Calories: 2,030
Saturated fat (g): 91
Sodium (mg): 720
Carbohydrates (g): 155

#2, Iron Skillet Apple Pie

Don Pablo’s

Calories: 1,303
Saturated fat (g): 29
Sodium (mg): 1,027
Carbohydrates (g): 147

#3, Chocolate Chip Paradise Pie

Chili’s

Calories: 1,290
Saturated fat (g): 33
Sodium (mg): 680
Carbohydrates (g): 163

#4, Sizzling Apple Pie

Applebee’s

Calories: 900
Saturated fat (g): 15
Sodium (mg): 990
Carbohydrates (g): 144

#5, Nutter Butter Peanut Butter Pie

Outback Steakhouse

Calories: 880
Saturated fat (g): 27
Sodium (mg): 741
Carbohydrates (g): 89

#6, Peanut Butter Silk Pie

Perkins

Calories: 960
Saturated fat (g): 33
Sodium (mg): 420
Carbohydrates (g): 73

#7, Bourbon Pecan Pie

Houlihan’s

Calories: 954
Saturated fat (g): 26
Sodium (mg): 441
Carbohydrates (g): 98

#8, Peanut Butter Pie

Fatz Cafe

Calories: 928
Saturated fat (g): 25
Sodium (mg): 353
Carbohydrates (g): 78

#9, French Silk Pie

Denny’s

Calories: 770

Saturated fat (g): 30
Sodium (mg): 400
Carbohydrates (g): 59

#10, Chocolate French Silk Pie

Perkins

Calories: 760
Saturated fat (g): 27
Sodium (mg): 330
Carbohydrates (g): 66

#11, Coconut Cream Pie

Perkins

Calories: 640
Saturated fat (g): 23
Sodium (mg): 470
Carbohydrates (g): 60

#12, Apple Pie à la mode

Steak ‘n Shake

Calories: 640
Saturated fat (g): 16
Sodium (mg): 500
Carbohydrates (g): 80

#13, Coconut Cream Pie

Denny’s

Calories: 630
Saturated fat (g): 24
Sodium (mg): 370
Carbohydrates (g): 65

Some pies here include a touch of bourbon, a lot of sizzle, and globs of peanut butter and ice cream. Enjoy these slices at your waistline’s own risk.

What other pies are deadly to eat? Visit The Daily Beast to find out.