10.23.12 6:21 AM ET
Pippa's Book Gets Killed By The Daily Mail (So, Er, Why Did They Buy The Rights, Then?)
The Daily Mail has a long tradition building 'em up to knock 'em down, and it seems even poor Pippa Middleton isn't immune.
For, having forked out a ton of cash to buy the rights to Pippa Middleton's Party Planning book which it is serializing in its Sunday magazine, the paper today rips the book to shreds in a hatchet job disguised as a book review by the Mail's hit woman in chief, Jan Moir, who describes it as perfect for people who need a recipe to make ice.
It's a masterclass of evil genius, however, and we have to share the meanest bits with you:
Moir starts off by berating Pippa for offering overly simple advice:
To stop cakes going stale, she advises storing them in something called ‘an airtight tin’, while hot drinks for picnics should be poured from flasks into ‘mugs or paper cups’.
Elsewhere, she explains the rules of a game of conkers and the correct way to toast marshmallows over a fire, a process that involves using ‘a long-handled fork’ and ‘flames’.
On Pippa's appearance in the many photos dotted throughout the book, Moir writes that Pippa looks: "As if she has gate-crashed a Boden catalogue shoot en route to starring in a Toast winter collection poster campaign after running naked through a cashmere mill covered in glue — but she does look lovely."
Another bone of contention is Pippa's assumption that everyone has a garden in which to entertain.
Pippa assumes that her readers will all have a garden in which to entertain their guests — fatally failing to understand that not everyone is like her friend Earl Percy, a former Edinburgh University flatmate whose garden is about the size of Northumberland because it actually is Northumberland.
Moir also notes tha Pippa says she is having ‘new ideas all the time’ and aks: "You’ve got to wonder — is that a promise or a threat?"