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Lizzie Stark

Why Are More Boomers Killing Themselves?

Posted by: Zelda 568 | 11:04 AM Oct 21 2008

I work in healthcare, and I see on many charts of women raising children lists of antidepressants and antianxiety meds. My observation is that a high percentage of these women are college educated but they have chosen to stay at home with kids. Working moms and women without kids dont seem to be taking these meds to the same degree.

Posted by: Raejeanowl | 12:33 PM Oct 21 2008

Whatever you think is middle-aged, I believe the entire score between 40-60 is a dangerous time for women. You are likely to still have child-rearing responsibilities while starting to assume caregiver duties for elders. You will be transitioning through menopause and you will have all of the health, sexual and cosmetic issues related to aging. Younger people will begin to ignore you or dismiss you (act like you are nonexistent). Your partner may begin to have health and sexual issues. And at work, the newly minted graduates are chomping at the bit for your job, willing to do it for much less, and resist the suggestion that they may need to learn more.Other than that, what's to be depressed about? As it's been said, gettin' old ain't for sissies.

Posted by: KPPGGA | 05:36 PM Oct 21 2008

I'm 55, been unemployed for over a year, have used up my savings and have to depend on my sister to help me out. I can't even get a job at Home Depot. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about doing away with myself. I have a lot to offer an employer, hard worker, dedicated, but no one will even give me a chance.

Posted by: LowBug | 02:42 PM Oct 21 2008

Once my duties as the doting daughter are complete, I will return to my home 400 miles away, darken every window, stock up on my wine, resume smoking and let nature runs its course, hoping Death won't be long coming for me to rejoin my late husband. He was my sanctuary, my harbor in the storm. His strength made me safe from this world and now, this world is a stranger to me.

Posted by: evelyna13a3 | 09:22 AMOct 21 2008

But middle aged men are very close to women in the suicide numbers. The older men cannot get younger women unless they have drugs and money. I think it has to do more with limited job opportunities and such. People get tired of applying for menial jobs and the changes. Tired of dealing with the health care system etc. Women do not feel discarded unless they allow themselves to be treated this way. The system makes it hard for people and I think people should not go so easy but suck more out of the system.

Posted by: TOberg6188 | 10:10 AMOct 21 2008

evelyna13a3, I so agree with you. You work hard all of your life and succeed in a career only to have it somehow eliminated by the economy, then go look for a job. The young people who interview us almost snarl at our age. We are "way old" in their opinion, and cannot not possibly be open minded, ready to learn, be void of a know it all attitude. Over and over again, my husband and I have not been given a chance to perform, and it is depressing. We even considered a double suicide when we couldn't make our house payments. We knew we would be better off dead than alive. Thank GOD we didn't do it. But this society where young placement and HR workers discriminate and therefore eliminate is pervasive and it is a big factor in us middle aged people's depression. (Compound that with our age related medical factors - try dealing with menopause and erectile dysfunction through all of this).

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October 22, 2008 | 8:04pm
Comments ()
Lucyaw

How about putting suicide death into perspective! We're still much better off now than we were in 1950 or even in the 1970s for that matter. See http://causeofdeathbook.blogspot.com/ for stats on suicide over time by sex and age from 1950 to 2005. There are far fewer suicides now (as a % of population) than then and life expectancy has dramatically improved.

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9:02 pm, Oct 22, 2008
SouthgoneNorth

I am not a baby boomer.

My parents are.

My mother would kill to be a "doting daughter" for someone. My father would sell my family home to spend one more day caring for my grandfather. Stop whining.

I have no life savings, no 401K, no way to buy a home for at least 10 years. But there's hope.Because I'm not going to spend my extra 25 bucks a week on wine and cigarettes and hope to die. If I were ever lucky enough to find a soul mate, a safe harbor in my world where we're taught that there's always something cooler-skinnier-blonder-richer-prettier, I know he wouldn't want that. And hot damn lady- you had that. Stop whining.

My two front teeth never came in- never. I don't have them. I bought them. I will pay them off for the rest of my life probably. I'm no where near Medicare and probably won't exist for me. I've had health issues in my brief 26 years. I don't even know what's coming next. The BPAs in my water bottles might kill me. I might have the gene for breast cancer and not know it. The depression might come back some day and I may need meds again...and who knows if I'll have insurance. STOP WHINING.

My father's diabetes will take his eyes and his body and eventually his life. He has insurance to pay for it, but it will still be slow and painful. STOP WHINING


Why run away? Isn't it more American to want to fight it out? We're Americans. We come from people who fought for things and now we're rolling over and playing dead!

Martin Luther King Jr is rolling in his grave.
Our Founding Fathers are wondering why they hell they gave bestowed upon us something as wonderful as the Constitution.

Boomers- stop bitching. If it pisses you off that much, do something about. We live in a republic. We have a voice. By playing dead, you're doing exactly what these "parasites" want you to do...


I

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9:03 pm, Oct 22, 2008
keepakeeper43

Dear "Lucyaw":
I dont think we are better off now than in "1950".
Prices have soared, salaries lag:
1950 Prices. Bread: $0.14/loaf. Milk: $0.82/gal. Eggs: $0.70/doz. Car: $1750. Gas: $0.27/gal. House: $14500. Stamp: $0.03/ea. Avg Income: $3815/yr.
1950 to 2007 simple daily costs and where US Federal Minimum Wage would be today at same growth rate:
postage stamp .03 to .41 = 5.241% = $13.66
gasoline .24 to $3 = 5.062% = $12.50
bread .19 to $2.50 = 5.165% = $13.16
avg income $3,815 @ 5.156% avg = $58,863
(Life is more desperate today)

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12:17 am, Oct 23, 2008
Stromko

I think there's a possibility that the plight of their children, not just their aging parents, is causing stress for the boomers. Their grown children are going through similar career difficulties, the incidence of health and mental problems is even spiking. The educational system has been failing twice as many kids as it's helping for decades, making their children are mostly even less employable.

I'd hate to beat this old tired drum, but giant corporations are the problem. The economy of scale ensures that the larger the business, the less people they need to meet demand. Less employees mean lower prices and higher stock values, both of which attract more money to the company. The more jobs that get cut, the more qualified applicants there are for each job opening, and the less money and benefits they receive.

It's a race to the bottom, and society is too apathetic to do anything about it. Politicians follow the cash, the very businesses who erode American lifestyles by cutting jobs, pay, and benefits are themselves paying less tax than their employees. Per capita we're putting a lot of money into schools, but school reform is going to cost even more money, money that has not been forthcoming, and they have already failed several generations who are now unwilling or unable to be the teachers and tax-payers of tommorow.

Our society is deteriorating. While many choose to blame atheism or loose morality, I think this decline has more to do with apathy for our overall society. The only thing most concerned Americans are doing "for the good of the nation" is push our kids to go to law school in order to fight for / against Roe v. Wade, when we could be encouraging them to start their own businesses or technology or even volunteering to help the less fortunate, so we or at least someone in this country can continue to be competitive on the global stage.

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12:59 am, Oct 23, 2008
like-mind

Lucyaw posted: "We're still much better off now than we were in 1950 or even in the 1970s for that matter...There are far fewer suicides now (as a % of population) than then and life expectancy has dramatically improved."

We're looking at a segment of the population who somehow managed to make it through those allegedly not-so-good-as-now 50s, 60s and 70s, only to suicide now. Your stats do not apply.

As a white Boomer, the article comes as little surprise: 'belonging' was a more common experience, back then. A theme common among the article's cited posts is 'I do everything I'm supposed to, and I am not made happy by it'.

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3:26 am, Oct 23, 2008
allenizabeth

Headline: In Final Act of Selfishness, Baby-Boomers Would Rather Die Than Cope With World They Created

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5:31 am, Oct 23, 2008
Issywise

keepakeeper43
"I dont think we are better off now than in "1950".

You must not be black, a woman who holds an interest in equal rights or a Gay interested in not being physically abused and incarcerated for his or her sexuality. If nothing else, we are not locked into an arid conformity like the one that saturated the 1950s like a trans fat oil (to mix up a couple of self-contradicting but somehow useful descriptive images).

The 1960s were a time of great progress on racial, gender and (the beginning of) homosexual justice: Free speech, one-man one-vote and a new commitment to melting-pot inclusiveness were all aspects of the sea change that occurred in the 1960s.

We boomers claim those accomplishments as our own--the fruits of our youth, but they were put in place by the generation that grew up in the depression and WWII: the very establishment we demonized. The white-sidewalled leaders of the time enacted those changes as we dressed obnoxiously and congregated at music venues.

Even the accomplishments we assert in our generational mythology aren't really ours. We were weaned on Mickey Mouse, raised on Gilligan's Island and spent our young adulthood addicted to cocaine or long-distance running. If our parents were the greatest generation, we were the vacuum in the atmosphere before air rushed back-in to slap together and create the first echo.

It could be that all the suicide in the boomer generation is brought on by delayed self-recognition, but I personally think it is an after-effect of all the mind altering drugs consumed in youthful self-celebration. After all, what you do does have an effect.

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8:51 am, Oct 23, 2008
JRJRJR

How about the fact that, in nearly every single country on the planet, male's kill themselves at a rate often 5 times more than females do?????

If these numbers were flip-flopped, would there be more concern???

http://www.who.int/mental_health/prevention/suicide_rates/en/index.html

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10:11 am, Oct 23, 2008
Aaronthethird

Seriously, you poor, sad baby boomers make me sick. You all feel like life is unfair and too hard and poor baby doesn't have life handed to them on a golden platter. Its your pathetic selfishness that has lead this country down the path to ruin that it has found itself at the end of now.

Seriously, shut up. I have been out of college for 6 years, I work 3 jobs, I am working my butt off to pay off all my debts so I can pay my own way to go back to get my masters. I could sit around and feel sorry for myself because my life is hard and its not fair that I have to work so hard for the government to take care of those who are less fortunate, but you know what, things aren't that bad in the grand scheme of things. I have a great family (wife and 2 great kids) and I have chosen this life I live.Take some responsibility for your circumstances instead of whining about how life is so unfair to you; make your life what you want it to be and stop complaining.

If poor baby's life is so hard then maybe baby should just sell all of their stuff and go move to a nice third world country where things are really bad. I am fairly sure after a couple of months of Calcutta or Darfur an unhappy rich baby boomer would come back here with a renewed sense of just how great life is here, for all its unfairness and difficulties.

Seriously, it amazes me how an entire generation has failed to ever grow up.

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10:24 am, Oct 23, 2008
mjdoran1979

For those of you suffering every day, I understand. Southgonenorth, I feel for you. You certainly have some issues ans they are very similar to the same people you told to stop whining. The difference is you still have energy. These fifty and sixty somethings are in pain everyday. They have a hard time sleeping and getting out of bed. They have a hard time bending down to pick up a fork they dropped on the floor. They remember when they could do almost everything you can do and it depresses them. The opportunities you face are so much more available that the ones that slip out of their hands.

There is a solution to this problem and it starts with creating new high paying jobs and rescuing the economy. If anyone is interested you can look at my blog and see my idea, http://mdoran.blogspot.com/ If you want additional information look at http://unlikelyangels.blogspot.com/2008/10/road-to-economic-recovery.html and if that isn't enough I will forward the mission statement to you.

This country got stong on the backs of Americans. They banded together and became the United States of America. In my plan we get back to basics: Christian values, American pride and collective strength.

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10:59 am, Oct 23, 2008
fauxyorker

Somewhere, an aging World War two veteran who was vilified as being the root of all evil and called a "chauvinist" or "capitalist pig" while being pushed out of his job, is smiling.

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12:06 pm, Oct 23, 2008
smdunne

I have volunteered at an urban American homeless shelter for the last ten years. I have been struck many times by the way that black, latino, asian - just about any non-white group - will come together and support each other through the stress of homelessness.

It is always the white "guests" as we call them, who are completely isolated from each other and everyone else. As a consequence their isolation makes them far more likely to become chronically depressed.

I think it is a good thing that these poor, overwhelmed people have found a place to connect with each other. It may sound like whining, but when people talk about suicidal feelings, they are much less likely to act on them.

Due to the sub-prime meltdown, we are seeing more people than ever who need shelter. Depression is a terrible illness, and in some cases can be fatal. In homeless shelters we see mentally ill people who lose their housing on a regular basis.

Please try not to judge them so harshly. We are all ultimately judged by the way we treat the most vulnerable people in our society.

The poor, the sick, the elderly and the very young are often not easy to live with, but it is our responsibility to look after them in the best way that we can. To whom much is given, much is expected. A kind word costs nothing and can mean the world to someone who is struggling to cope.

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12:34 pm, Oct 23, 2008
southernyankee

My husband has a degree, retired from the military after 21 yrs. I had worked and we moved to where his parents lived, in a small town because they were elderly. My husband ended up working at a well known dept. store and we never lived high on the hog. His parents gave us a piece of land and we put a double trailer on it and have live alright. Now my son and his daughter live in our trailer and we moved into the parents old home next door. The house needs alot of work. But am not worried about it. We are trying to live on one income and I stay home to take care of my grandchild while my son and husband go to work. I have medical problems and my husband has started going thru some medical problems. We are trying to pay our bills off. I pray for my family for our health and well being. Also I pray for our country's well being. Suicide is not the way. I will file bankrupts before I would kill myself. There are people you can go to for help. Before anyone does something stupid go speak with someone. God bless you if you have troubles. We all need friends to speak with.

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12:41 pm, Oct 23, 2008
southernyankee

I have taken the time to read some of these posts. Wow it really makes me wonder what has happened to people in the country. Whatever happen to empathy? I grew up in a large family. None of us ever had a hand out (thank god) but there are people who need help and we should not judge people. I worked at a food kitchen and boy that really opened my eyes. To see families that are working having to come to a food kitchen because they can't afford renting and food and medicines for their family. This is what is going on everyday in our country. Bush administration hasn't provided low income housing that people can rent. Working families only want what every one else wants thats a living wage. Until you have been in some of these people shoes you have no idea. I am old. I don't have a bank savings, we live from payday to payday. Between my husband and I we spend alot for dr. appointment and than have to buy our medicines. I am not old enough to get medicare. Yet I don't ask for any hand outs thank god. Some of you people that say the things you say have never been in some of these peoples shoes until than (I pray you don't) stop judging because god judges all of us.

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12:53 pm, Oct 23, 2008
Catch22

After reading all 4 pages of this article, I found maybe 3 or 4 legit sob stories, where the writer has a reason to whine and complain. 1 examlpe being the woman with fibro-myalgia. That sounds a) awful and b) wholly out of her control. The rest of you baby boomers that are whining while you wait to wipe out all the Social Security money that will be long gone before I retire, need to suck it up. Thanks to allenizabeth for her comment here. Those of you saying you have no savings need to whine in front of a mirror, give me a break. I am 25, have no college degree and have only worked full time for 6 years (probably less) and yet I have about 2 months worth of expenses in a savings account, and a roughly equal amount of money that remains untouched in my checking account. I have also managed to save effectively in a 401(k). So you baby boomers that were part of the generation that reported a negative dollar amount in savings for the last several years, have no one to blame but yourselves in MOST situations. Oh and I saw comments about losing saving because of the market. And FYI that's not savings that you lost, that's an investment. You only lose savings if you spend it, investing involves risk that you were (or should've been) aware of. So sorry, but sh*t happens.

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2:04 pm, Oct 23, 2008
callmebaby

I so get this. I don't think boomers are just bitching. We are collapsing. I have marched for peace & been tear gassed to stop Vietnam, been vilified for supporting choice, threatened for working on gun control, papered malls for Gore to save the environment, dodged alligators in Florida working for Kerry, crawled on my knees for Hillary it lasted so long and now am sucking it up and supporting Obama. I am EXHAUSTED. I am tired of working so hard and playing by the rules my whole life and I got nothin' to show for it. War, financial collapse, global warming unchecked, Roe v Wade doomed, and I can't kill myself because I'm Catholic and don't want to burn in hell. As the Wicked Witch said, "What a world!" I am working for euthanasia laws so at least they can put me out of my misery when the time comes.

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2:16 pm, Oct 23, 2008
Catch22

mjdoran, thanks for shooting down southgonenorth with a ridiculous argument. South...'s situation is easier because he/she is young still? That's preposterous. People are born, they grow up, grow old, and die. If just growing old and the normal things that go with that are depressing you so much, maybe you need to get some freaking perspective! I bet our troops who died at 18, 20, 25 and so on would LOVE to deal with the effects of aging if we could ask their opinions. I am glad that some poster called out those of us lacking empathy and being judgmental. I don't have much empathy for whiners, but I am not trying to judge baby boomers, merely question their views on their circumstances. As a Christian I am taught to be content in all situations, and as an intelligent American I am aware that even were I homeless I'd be better off then the majority of the world's poplulation. The social services we have here far exceed those in the rest of the world with the possible exception of the best Western European countries, Canada, and Japan.

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2:19 pm, Oct 23, 2008
ParzifalGF

How refreshing to hear that so many of the Baby-Boomers I've grown up with are finding that the material dominance they thought would save them has vanished. In age, particularly when accompanied by some mental or physical chronic pain, we are called on to rise to something formally inconceivable: self-reckoning, illusion disintegration and death. So, what's so important about those dollars that you've accumulated? They won't keep death away, whether self-afflicted or naturally occurring. As long as death does not take your body, perhaps there is something to be found in living besides dollars in all their forms.

As Joseph Campbell, my Spiritual Father, often said,
"We must be willing to get rid of
the life we've planned, so as to have
the life that is waiting for us.

The old skin has to be shed
before the new one can come. . .

Hell is life drying up.

The Hoarder,
the one in us that wants to keep,
to hold on, must be killed. . .

You can't make an omelet
without breaking eggs.

Destruction before creation. '

Quit whining. Life sounds like it has been better to you than most (like those without a high speed connection). This is because of that and that is because of this only provides simplistic excuses to life's most precious meaning. One must go into the darkest reaches of the cave to obtain the most brilliant jewels held within.

Don't worry, death will come. It is what we do with life that makes the only sense.

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2:43 pm, Oct 23, 2008
Catch22

Just a final observation to CallMeBaby: Roe v. Wade is doomed? why? Obama is on pace to win the election, McCain is a moderate in case he pulls of the upset, and far-right Bush and his conservative court didn't overturn Roe v. Wade. Not to mention that your position is hypocritical, because you name your Catholic beliefs as a reason to not kill yourself, but are pro-choice.

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3:07 pm, Oct 23, 2008
idolatree

I wrote up this big rant. but really it's a waste of space. Here is my point.

Look beyond your immediate satisfaction. Realize what a better world this would be if people did take care of their elders. Understand that you can, in fact, learn to live without a car, a TV, a lover, a title. Most of the pain people feel in life is because they don't think they are getting what they deserve. Self pity? Judging yourself by how other people see you?

Stop sitting in your own shit. It's not doing you any good. Life isn't about stuff. It's not about comfort. Life is just an opportunity and even though you can not control what happens sometimes, you can always learn to control your reaction to it.

Choose laughter, enjoy the sunshine and the rain. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. And for f*cks sake, take care of some old people. Someone changed your diapers right?

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3:07 pm, Oct 23, 2008
wastedyouth

My comment goes out to American. I, too, do not believe in god. At least not the christian one we're badgered with here in this country! :0) So, from one scientifically minded person to another, seeing a doctor who is trained on chemical imbalance issues could help dramatically. Not producing enough serotonin can cause these feeling you are having and drug therapies can help. If not for yourself, do it for your wife.

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3:17 pm, Oct 23, 2008
mggranadillo

Also for CallMeBaby: euthanasia (like abortion and suicide) is also a sin, so perhaps there is something you can do with your time: sit down and review your Catechisms. You might have been baptized Catholic, but that doesn't necessarily make you one.

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3:41 pm, Oct 23, 2008
SacredCod

Interesting article in the Washington Post about the negative outlook of Boomers

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/07/09/AR20080 70902281.html

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3:58 pm, Oct 23, 2008
aliana

The blog post by Lizzie Stark is very unclear - the rise was 3.9 and 2.7 ANNUALLY for white females and white males, respectively. So, the total increase between 1999 and 2005 was 35 percent for white females and 33 percent for white males. The Post article clarifies this.

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4:14 pm, Oct 23, 2008
Lucyaw

Americans are happiest when we are working. See updated suicide death rates vs unemployment rates at http://causeofdeathbook.blogspot.com/. I just hope we aren't going back to the situation in the 1970s as far as unemployment and suicide death rates go. It was worse then than now.

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5:09 pm, Oct 23, 2008
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Why Are More Boomers Killing Themselves?

by Lizzie Stark

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