My Date With Sean Penn

This was the happiest and most gemütlich set I was ever on, and I’ve been on a lot of sets. I also noticed that there were no “star,” director, producer or crew chairs. It was a very democratic set and there was no attempt at hierarchy.

To many of my friends, I’ve contrasted the producer's life with the actor's life. A producer constantly gets told, “No, no, no, no, no,” and an actor gets told :”Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes” (once he gets the part, of course). A close friend said to me, “It’s like one day you’re an ordinary guy, and the next you get to be an astronaut being shot to the Moon!”

The week after I got home I got a call from Ellen Chenowith’s office. She was casting the Coen Brothers' A Serious Man. Brian Swardstrom, my closest friend and now my agent, represents Frances McDormand, and he told Frances that I was great in Milk. Frances said, "Well he's gotta try out for Joel's new movie." Now I'm auditioning for two roles, the Rabbi and a lawyer.

Then Charles Shyer caught wind of my acting. He wrote and directed Father of the Bride. He just wrote Eloise in Paris with his daughter Hallie. He's going to direct it in the fall; Uma Thurman is starring. "Hey babe," purred Charles over the phone. "I hear you just worked with Sean and Gus. I've written a part in Eloise that's right up your alley, an over-the-top French designer. I need a really thick French accent. Nathan Lane wants to play it but I think you're a more original choice. Would you like to read for it?"

So now I've been invited to join the Screen Actors Guild and I'll be eligible for the better benefits (Plan B) of the SAG Health Plan. What a relief; it's much less expensive than my Blue Cross plan!

Maybe when I'm old and grey, I'll finally have a way to make a living.