Perez Hilton: Get Famous or Die Trying

Getty Images for Perez Hilton The self-made gossip proprietor on the twelve steps to celebrity recognition and what Angelina Jolie and Paris Hilton have in common.

In 2004, an aspiring celebrity-weekly reporter named Mario Lavandiera dubbed himself Perez Hilton and started a bitchy, gossipy blog about his namesake and the other quasi-celebs. Soon enough, Star magazine fired him, but PerezHilton.com has grown into a behemoth. Now Lavandiera/Hilton, who also has a show on satellite radio, has published his first book, Red Carpet Suicide: A Survival Guide on Keeping Up With the Hiltons. It’s partly a guide to achieving fame for fame’s sake, partly a consideration of the future of Hollywood celebrity, partly a manifesto on his craft—but mostly a collection of jokey observations about his usual targets. He spoke to The Daily Beast about what defines a "hilton.”

Read an excerpt from Perez Hilton’s book.

Red Carpet Suicide is a guide to becoming what you call “a hilton,” with lowercase H. What’s a hilton?

A hilton is the codeword for a celebrity, or anyone famous, whether or not they have talent. Not necessarily somebody who’s related to Paris or Nicky. Anyone can be a hilton—even Angelina Jolie has hilton-like qualities. She’s pimping out her baby, she’s doing a lot of good humanitarian work, but she always makes sure that there’s a photographer to document it all. You can be an A-lister and be a hilton in my book.

And you give twelve steps to becoming one.

The first one in the book is “be a skinny bitch,” and that’s one that I took to heart this past year. I probably lost over 50 pounds. I’d rather be Nicole Richie than Kirstie Alley any day. And it’s one of the harsh realities if you want to be a hilton. Another is, you’ve go to put the “ho” in Hollywood. If you’re a D-lister, one of the easiest ways to increase your own fame is to date up. Look at Katie Holmes. She pretty much was, I’d say, like C-minus before she started dating Tom Cruise. Now they’re married, having a baby, and she’s pretty high up there. Or Miley Cyrus. You can never be too young to unleash your inner ho.

So of the twelve steps, which do you think is the most effective?

I don’t know if just one of them’s going to work. You have to do the steps together with the other ones. But, I’d say, put the ho in Hollywood. It’s about who you know, or who you blow. My motto is, you’ve got to give head to get ahead.