Blogs and Stories
Kinkonomics
And at $200 an hour, a piquant visit to a Manhattan dungeon for a spanking administered by a good-looking girl with a liberal arts degree is easier on a guy’s wallet than the “girlfriend experience” offered by many an Internet courtesan. If a pro-domme permits him to “satisfy himself,” the end result may be similar enough to what he would get from an escort—and less expensive. Men who pay for kink aren’t all diehard fetishists or submissives—a spanking isn’t essential to their personal happiness. It may be an occasional side thrill. Clients are middle-management types, small-business owners, dentists, young lawyers, even a few single males who see themselves as casualties of the gig economy. A fence-sitter—flirting with, not truly committed to kink—might discover that the antidote to a recession resides in the nearest S&M parlor.
He might also be surprised to learn that the woman whose toes he’s sucking isn’t much kinkier than he is. Because many of these freelance pro-dommes are just supplementing their incomes and don’t plan on staying in sex work forever, they may not be as erotically hardcore in their outside lives. “I wasn't really that interested” in S&M, says Chloe. “I got involved because it was easy money. The strap-on? I'm OK with it, but it's not really a personal interest of mine.”
Chloe is a middle-income student about to graduate from the School of Visual Arts. Her dungeon activities pay for school supplies, shoes, laptop equipment, Metro cards, and food. She’s even used freelance kink work to allow her to take an unpaid internship—something you can't necessarily do if you're not bankrolled by your parents. In this way, S&M promotes social mobility. Chloe says her mother "would probably cry" and be "very upset" about her fetish gigs, but I suspect some parents would be secretly proud of a daughter resourceful enough to hack the increasingly rigid class system that permeates New York life.
Though dominatrix work is considered by many to be the hardest in the sex industry, being able to avoid actual intercourse is key to its appeal to “everyday” women who are just looking to pick up a little extra money to pay the bills. Because of this, counterintuitive as it sounds, the kink sector tends to attract women who are more risk-averse than traditional call girls—and more law-abiding.
Lyla, for instance, has worked the fetish party circuit as a popular foot model and pro-domme, always “staying within the bounds of what was legal.” She is understandably proud to have “a very particular foot with a high arch.” On a good night, she might bring in $1,000—“you get to keep it all, and it's completely legal,” she adds, citing a celebrated 1994 decision (New York v. Georgia A.) concerning the definition of “sexual conduct,” a key element of prostitution law.
That court decision has been a blessing and, perhaps, a curse—contributing to an oversupply of talent. Not every pro-domme earns as much as Lyla does because, she says, “dungeon managers take advantage of the social stigma around our work.” Some domination houses pocket a pro-domme's tips, while others impose wacky fines. Although the work itself is legal, people—especially freelancers—are reluctant to challenge these practices through official channels.
So has kink lost its glamour? Is it just a bunch of office drones slipping it into their schedules of consulting gigs and child rearing? Actually, kink was never as glam as people imagined it to be. Trust me, I know: Even if you’re bossing your client around in a pair of thigh-high boots, you’re still working in a service industry. And after an hour, your feet hurt.
Tracy Quan, David Sterry and Elisabeth Eaves discuss sex work after the crash on Friday, February 6, at KGB Bar, 85 E. Fourth Street, New York City, 7 to 9p.m.
Tracy Quan's latest novel is Diary of a Jetsetting Call Girl, set in Provence and praised in The Nation as a "deft account of occupational rigors and anxieties before the crash." She is the author of the bestsellers Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl and Diary of a Married Call Girl and is a columnist for The Guardian.
The Right Dumps Carrie
Jacob Bernstein is a senior reporter at The Daily Beast. Previously, he was a features writer at WWD and W Magazine. He has also written for New York magazine, Paper, and The Huffington Post.
What's Joe's Problem?
Lloyd Grove is editor at large for The Daily Beast. He is also a frequent contributor to New York magazine and was a contributing editor for Condé Nast Portfolio. He wrote a gossip column for the New York Daily News from 2003 to 2006. Prior to that, he wrote the Reliable Source column for the Washington Post, where he spent 23 years covering politics, the media, and other subjects.
Geithner's Stock Plummeting
Jeff Madrick is a contributor to the New York Review of Books and a former economics columnist for the New York Times. He is editor of Challenge Magazine, visiting professor of humanities at Cooper Union, and senior fellow at the New School's Schwartz Center for Economic Policy Analysis. He is the author of Taking America, The End of Affluence (Random House) and The Case for Big Government.
Mary Magdalene and Me
Tracy Quan's latest novel is Diary of a Jetsetting Call Girl, set in Provence and praised in The Nation as a "deft account of occupational rigors and anxieties before the crash." Tracy's debut, Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl, and the sequel, Diary of a Married Call Girl, are international bestsellers. A regular columnist for The Guardian, she has written for many publications including Cosmopolitan, The Financial Times, and The New York Times.
Bedding the Boss
Tracy Quan's latest novel is Diary of a Jetsetting Call Girl, set in Provence and praised in The Nation as a "deft account of occupational rigors and anxieties before the crash." Tracy's debut, Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl, and the sequel, Diary of a Married Call Girl, are international bestsellers. A regular columnist for The Guardian, she has written for many publications including Cosmopolitan, The Financial Times, and The New York Times.
Bernie Made Off With My Wife
Tracy Quan's latest novel is Diary of a Jetsetting Call Girl, set in Provence and praised in The Nation as a "deft account of occupational rigors and anxieties before the crash." Tracy's debut, Diary of a Manhattan Call Girl, and the sequel, Diary of a Married Call Girl, are international bestsellers. A regular columnist for The Guardian, she has written for many publications including Cosmopolitan, The Financial Times, and The New York Times.
oh. my.
I was just starting to like this web site...
This is definitely Fall of Rome 2.0.
zoinks...
Where do you people come up with this garbage? First the woman who "lets" a guy support her in exchange for sex (but thinks she is not a whore) and now this.
How about writing about something worth writing about? At least you didn't kill a tree to publish this crap.
I'm not even going to read this idiotic story.
The Beast is fishing. Ignore the bait.
This comment has been removed by The Daily Beast's editors.
Working has an independent sex worker, if you have common sense, has virtually no legal risk.
Working in a dungeon means having an employer and the potential that the police will come visiting one day.And that bust, even if legally gray, will surely make the papers.
Plus, the dungeon business has (anecdotaly) been severely hurt by the recession.Unless the new girl has some special skill or look, clients will be scarce.
*LAUGHS*
Spanking and nipple clamps? Maybe at the Disney-Suicide-Girls parlor...being a good Dom takes years of practice - something some twit swinging a plastic paddle from Lover's Lane can't touch. Still, it's nice to see people enjoying themselves and perhaps it will all be legal someday and the more people try it out the more to play with~
This is just as much a part of life as what some deem newsworthy. And in this economy, there's going to be several "uncomfortable" accounts of how we're dealing with it...I appreciate the news, but this site offers more than just that...I thoroughly enjoy the articles about relationships and the awkward conversations that can ensue...keep it up.
LOL... Amateurs...
(agree with you "LtCol"... after the stuff I saw/did overseas, bring on Tracy Quan -HOO-RAH)
I don't remember Helen Reddy referring to this as an outcome when singing "I am woman, hear me roar". Who knew it would come to this? ;
Interesting. I am a professional woman who considered for the 1st time beginning work as a sex phone operator for extra income. I spent part of this past weekend researching this profession, and am deeply torn about the moral issues involved. I think that it is quite easy for those not involved in this line of work to rush to a negative judgement. In reality, the sex industry is a very real part of both our society and economy, as well as being a viable source of income for many women. I just wish that better legislation existed to protect people who are exploited. This is not an industry that will disappear anytime soon.
What's odd is that it's not the article I find offense, irrelevant, or trivial, but the above comments. Are these the people who read "Daily Beast?" Frightened, small minded prudes?!
Although, to be fair, as another one in the "sex sells" sequel, at least this one pretends to be journalism and not a journal entry. Or worse. And the author isn't an intern. Which for a "Read This, Skip That" publication is kind of mandatory, is it not?
This comment has been removed by The Daily Beast's editors.
Thanks for the article. I found it interesting, credible and in all honesty fun to read. I have always had a sort of side interest in kink, though practically no real life experience in it, and I like the idea of "regular" women doing temp work in it. Not sure why exactly but it actually causes me to have a higher opinion of them, their flexibility and the potential depth of all women in general.
Now here's a real stretch for blog pieces. I guess it could be called an example of supply side economics but I don't predict huge returns for it either. Instead of toe sucking, one day those guys are going to have to think about paying the rent.
ANY PRO IN A STORM
When a recession
Sex session
Discounts
Its mounts,
The winners
Aren't sinners
But guys sold
On the opportunity of getting into a warm bed out of the cold.
Personally, I have no problem with anyone doing this, or anyone paying to have it done.
I just wonder who the clients are, and where they're getting the money to pay for the sessions. Are only WOMEN losing their jobs? If men are losing their jobs too, are they still spending the $200?
Anyone that thinks "the scene" is not about sex is delusional-not matter what they say the rules are-this article is not even close to being reality.
I am a very established professional dominatrix. I'd like to say that this article is extremely misleading. My criticism is that the quality of experience that one has working in professional domination is directly proportional to the amount of time, money, effort, and sincerity that one invests in it.
If you come in as a novice treating this work as a frivolous lark, you are likely to attract the least desirable clients. By this I mean clients that are demanding, demeaning, cheap, and generally unpleasant.
On the other hand, if you want to invest several years in education and training in this field and several thousand dollars minimum on equipment and wardrobe, you can attract a higher quality clientele and have a better experience working. However, the pay is still probably less that you would make as an administrative assistant.
This work is stressful, challenging, and a highly demanding labor of love not for the feint of heart.
The media always loves a dominatrix story, though, so I expect we'll keep reading sensationalistic crap like this.
Oh, and yes, the economy does effect the adult industry. Sexwork may be slightly insulated, but is certainly not recession-proof.
I wonder how the streets during the great drepression looks like. Lots of hanky spanking on the hairy bottom of the jobless middle aged guys?
.................
http://thesuffrage.blogspot.com/
I've always thought this a fascinating concept - the "pro domme" and as tempting as it may sound to some women to decide to go on Craigs List and advertise they are a domme and read up a bit about it on the internet, by some knee high boots and a whip.... I'd warn them to watch out. There are freaks out there who you might not want to be so dumb as to invite them to your house for an hour in the afternoon. Without the proper knowledge and experience, I think it can be a very dangerous thing to suggest to the "average non-working girl" as an income supplement. Yes, it takes years to be a pro at this. Standards must be upheld! A little toe sucking in a dungeon can't harm anyone. A strap on at your house during the day with a stranger, asking for BIG trouble. Interesting subject though....
The idea that a woman with no previous sex industry experience can get a high paying, cash only job WITHOUT having sex with anybody is ridiculous. This is no different that the 19 year old high school dropout who believes the want ad telling her she can make $5000/week as an exotic dancer. I'm glad to see that quasi-educated middle class women fall for the same nonsense. There are no non-sexual sex industry jobs, and the only people making money in the sex industry are the pimp. If you want to believe otherwise, I've got a bridge you might be interested in...
What I see here is some laughable BS! A Domme, pro or lifestyle, needs a thorough understanding of anatomy, safety, some very skilled and sophisticated work if she uses rope or clamps of any kind. Even a spanking takes an education.
Then there's the psychology. A client goes to a Pro Domme with a certain set of needs, mental (bondage is a psych release) or Physical - don't knock genotorture until you've had it from somebody who knows how to do it right.
No decent dungeon would hire a vanilla girl; there's more here than you think. The number of submissives who work in dungeons is pretty high and I suspect these gig girls aren't so innocent as claimed. Toe sucking is one thing but learning to handle the equipment takes time and a sore arm. And if I paid for a bondage and flogging- I know from bondage and flogging.
So get it right Tracy. Lot of submissives do dungeon work, they know how. This is like that stripper story of "I'm just doing this for tuition money... Champagne cocktail please".
Some of the replies are close to the mark. The scene is quite widespread,
and, there are significant differences in skillsets, even among pro doms....
It could be quite dangerous going to a part-time unschooled amateur pro -
nor is it necessary - there are _many_ organizations where one can befriend
and be taught the ropes, and certainly play with great satisfaction. The pro doms are like _any_ profession: only a small percent are worth their compensation... the cognoscenti know though, that DeSade was a genius,
and that _natural_ endorphins can simply __not_ be surpassed... It is a bloody shame that the Puritans got, and still hold so many people's minds...
We are as our maker made us, and certainly not in the mindset of Puritans,
whom the deity laughs at.....
A very well written, interesting look at one of the byways opened up by the current recession.
Thank you.
As a first time user, your comment has been submitted for review. It can take anywhere from a few hours to a day or two for your comment to be reviewed, depending on the time of week and the volume of comments we receive.
Please log in to leave comments.