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Let's Stop the Twitter Madness
We all want to be connected to each other in a kind of giant kumbaya. But here is what I want to know: Who in the hell has time for this stuff?
I read with amusement Monday’s Washington Post column about “Twittering” and now everyone seems to be getting into the act.Somehow, somewhere, we all want to know, minute by minute what each other is doing... Do we? I can understand some of the occasional useful aspects of networking and canvassing large amounts of people instantly, but to me most twittering is voyeurism cloaked as social networking, navel gazing re-cast as information gathering.
Well I say let’s stop the madness. I’ve stayed by the sidelines with one eyebrow arched as social networks have begun proliferating like algae first among my tweens and teens and then spilling over into full blown adults who almost sheepishly tell me they now have a Facebook and I should too. Yeah, and I’ll be sure to post a picture of my latest nipple piercing as well as the time I got completely blotto and stuck a cigarette in each nostril.
How have we let social interaction pare us down to fewer than 140 keystrokes?
LinkedIn, MySpace, Facebook and now someone sent me an email to join “My Butterfly,” which to me sounded like a new kind of vibrator one might find in Manhattan’s East Village. Still, it was time to venture into the brave new world. Being somewhat current and having two teenagers, I finally learned how to text message and I’ve succumbed to the “LinkedIn” network. Now reunion.com is haunting me but so far I have resisted. I figure if I’m desperate enough to dig up new people from my past who remember me in a hideous ‘70s prom dress with Farrah Fawcett wings, then I have a bigger issue.
OK, I get it. I’m not that square or that old. We all want to be connected to each other in a kind of giant kumbaya. We all want to know what our friends are doing or we like to realize that “gee—celebrities are just like us.” But here is what I want to know: Who in the hell has time for this stuff?
Who?
I can’t stay on top of my emails. They pile in faster than waves lapping at the shore; work items, emails from my kids’ schools, sports schedules, old friends who are bitter about the fact I only type back a few lines. There are the jokes, the SPAM, the deadlines.
When I read about news anchor David Gregory of NBC plunging into the world of Twittering to tell us he is eating a bagel or ABC’s Terry Moran ripping off a Tweet as he boards a plane, geez—I wonder—who are these people on their hand-held devices or home computers glued to this cliff-hanging action?
How far are we from the minutiae of someone’s stomach virus, a lost button on a favorite pair of corduroys or, to steal loosely from the late John Updike, the announcement of a perfectly coiled bowel movement in the bowl after the morning’s first cup of Joe?
And while I do love you, David Gregory, honestly—announcing that your wife is off skiing with a kid and you are home watching Dumbo on the couch with your twins is like an open invitation to a stalker or pedophile to come on over (after they Google the address) hit you over the head with a fitted pipe and drag one of your youngin’s into their lair. Didn’t this happen to David Letterman? And he was just minding his own business.
I guess Twittering is supposed to make us feel all up-to-the minute, all warm and fuzzy as part of a greater, universe of folks out there. If I want to feel warm and fuzzy, I’ll get horizontal on a couch with my elastic waistband and fast forward the Thelma and Louise DVD to the shots of a young Brad Pitt. I don’t need to know that someone just visited their office vending machine for Doritos or that they are about to take their Shit-zu for a walk. I don’t want to know that kind of info about my own husband.
Again, who are these people who are Twittering back? If they are employed, shouldn’t they be (particularly in this economy) putting their noses to the grindstone? Shouldn’t they be concerned for their jobs, laboring away at their desks, working the phones, hopping to, rather than twittering away about last night’s bad Chinese food?
And what if they aren’t employed? What if they are kicking about at home, maybe a wife or hubby just hanging out while the kids are at school, or someone in transit on a train or bus. Don’t these people have better things to do then telegraph their where-abouts? Isn’t there laundry to throw in, some real news to catch up on online or a good book to read? Books. Remember them? They came off a printing press. What about a little do-gooding in the community, English as a second language to teach, a PTO board to assist. How about, God forbid, an honest good old-fashioned moment of repose and reflection?
How have we let social interaction pare us down to fewer than 140 keystrokes?Or is it that rather than really connect with the people we already don’t have time for, rather than truly finding the energy to engage in more meaningful conversation and in-depth questioning, we’d prefer to read about how eggplant gives someone gas or help a cyberspace acquaintance decide if they should cut their bangs.
I understand the need in this instant society for an instant consensus—“Ok- I’m going to interview the president what should I ask?” But honestly, if your J-school education and previous years covering the White House didn’t prepare you for the fact that it’s the economy stupid, and then maybe you’d better get a job at Weekly World News.
I think Twittering is largely about vanity. It’s about the fact that in this crazy, noisy, hustle bustle world, we can get people to listen. Someone is out there. And as we spend ever-increasing amounts of time as a society on line, isolated in front of some sort of screen, a sea shift begins to occur.
We raise a generation unable to concentrate on anything long and involved, on Homer’s Odyssey, Harper Lee’s classic or even a live performance of The Nutcracker. Our kids become bored with following a longer thread of dialogue in a simple movie like Mary Poppins (not enough action my 9-year-olds, say) or classics like Dr. Zhivago with less interesting camera angles and no fast paced MTV edits that slash across the screen like Clockwork Orange torture.
We lose the art of crafting a thank you note, or the impact of a well-written sympathy card after a loved one dies. Remember letters? When was the last time you sent one? And I don’t mean a Hallmark card. Our communication now is ephemeral. We leave no footprints, have no aha moments of composition or putting forth our strongest work. We speak in LOLs and BFFs and TBDs.
I’m not gonna go all retro on you here. I know I sound a bit like Archie Bunker. I’ll be the first to admit that instant communication has a premiere place in my universe. My BlackBerry enables me to stay slightly on top of the pile while out of the office. And I’m not saying I’m never, ever going to join Twitter—I learned long ago never to say never. But people—let’s use a little moderation here. Get back to your desks. Go read an article in the New Yorker. You remember those, don’t you? Magazines?
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Lee Woodruff is the life and family contributor for ABC’s Good Morning America and the author of In an Instant: A Family's Journey of Love and Healing.
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Lloyd Grove is editor at large for The Daily Beast. He is also a frequent contributor to New York magazine and was a contributing editor for Condé Nast Portfolio. He wrote a gossip column for the New York Daily News from 2003 to 2006. Prior to that, he wrote the Reliable Source column for the Washington Post, where he spent 23 years covering politics, the media, and other subjects.
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Martin Jacques is the cofounder of the UK think tank Demos, writes a regular column for The Guardian, and is a visiting research fellow at the London School of Economics Asia Research Centre. His new book, When China Rules the World, is available now.
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Christopher Buckley's books include Supreme Courtship, The White House Mess, Thank You for Smoking, Little Green Men, and Florence of Arabia. He was chief speechwriter for Vice President George H.W. Bush, and is editor-at-large of ForbesLife magazine. His new book is Losing Mum and Pup, a memoir. Buckley's Daily Beast column is the winner of an Online Journalism Award in the category of Online Commentary.
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Lee Woodruff is the life and family contributor for ABC’s Good Morning America and the author of In an Instant: A Family's Journey of Love and Healing and Perfectly Imperfect.
I'm on Twitter, and I still read books, have face to face conversations and write letters. Twitter helps me make connections that I wouldn't necessarily make as I do not live in LA or NY. Also, many people point me to great articles and give me useful advice. Believe it or not, it's not just for self-indulgence.
Excellent column. Twittering is techie masturbation. The real thing feels a lot better.
If at first you don't succeed - try, try again
First Mark McKinnon and now Lee Woodruff are telling us not to twitter.
We get it. The Plutocrats are scared out of their minds that the unwashed masses could actually form opinions and receive information in a way that is simply too constrained for their money to manipulate it. They don't want you using twitter. Whatever you do - don't tweet. Not cool. You should be busy, etc., etc., etc.
Bottom line - listen to THEM. Not yourselves.
Machiavelli never had to worry about a 140 char limit.
James Carville said in "The War Room" that he would defeat the attempts by the Republicans to define the Democrats with "speed". James knew what he was talking about.
Blogger Pundita wrote last year about the challenge of governing a population that was literally smarter than the government itself.
http://tinyurl.com/cfqbm6
Couple Pundita's observation of a plugged in, connected, and a highly educated, tech-savvy nation with Carville's insight of defeating spin with speed and what do you have?
twitter.
If I was a Plutocrat, I'd tell you not to use it, too.
my sentiments EXACTLY Lee!! I joined "Twitter" thinking I could use it as a marketing tool to help create a "Buzz"' for a documentary I'm trying to raise $$ for. The doc. is about my dear friend, actress- social activist Marsha Hunt. I went on twitter, asking research questions that i hoped people would answer but I learned early on that NO ONE answers you back on twitter. It seems to be mostly about as you mention, what I'm doing with my kids and what I had to eat for lunch. I wish people would use twittter less for "Facebook" type topics and stick to exchanging ideas and causes they believe in. That's how I use twitter..I post articles about books & films i like as well as causes I believe will inspire and educate. As a TV producer/researcher, it IS nice to have a new avenue to reach professionals that were once considered hard to get a hold of. So I will continue to use Twitter as a "research" tool. I'll ask the questions - and who knows, maybe I'll get answers. SOMEONE out there in "Twitterland" must know if there there are any people alive today who were involved with HUAC that would go on camera to say 60 years later, that they were wrong? Or who is doing cutting edge research regarding stem cells and macular degeneration. Marsha has this disease and I would to find a cure so she can see my doc. I met a stem cell research expert on Twitter. He accepted me as a follower but NEVER answered my questions.. very frustrating.. Twitter Does Have Merit- but you spoke the truth in your well written article..thanks SO much Lee.
C'mon now, isn't this just a goofy and predictable contrarian rant? Short-form communication and the glory of compression are as ancient and honorable as the Haiku. I've never heard the Haiku blamed for the decline of Oriental civilization; seems like Japanese children have done just fine academically despite its evil influence.
The column is embarrassing and reeks of hubris.You sound like a digital immigrant. Not flattering at all. You haven't tried twittering so how in the world are you qualified to judge it's value and at the same time make sweeping judgments about the people who do use it.
If you spent a couple of weeks twittering and then came to your conclusions, okay. But to judge a communication channel before you try it is like judging a person based on their race or religion without getting to know them first. Twitter bigotry is no more appealing than regular bigotry.
I saw this update on Twitter!
I'll tell you how we have time for this stuff. We're digital. We know how to multi-task. We have good phones and we know how to use them. We realize if we don't keep up, our next career will consist of writing blogs complaining about things we blew off and don't understand.
http://tinyurl.com/bb3njv
lee, you're just mad because we would have to otherwise suffer through your prose (100 characters..)
Get over yourself Lee, Twitter is a great tool your article is misinformed full of attitude & completely misses the boat.
Twitter is a gifthorse everyday an abundant stream of resource information links, laden with connectivity, discovery, breaking news info images video & the ability to connect on the fly. & the biggest resource PEOPLE, to dismiss as you have proves you have little regard for the positives of a great tool or the facts. There are micro clusters of rapidly forming communities, in music in the arts, education journalism etc they would strongly disagree with your 'lite' assessment of Twitter.
Certainly there are the twitidiots who tweet about getting drunk, spamming total strangers or that their pimple on their ass hurts,,, Sometimes tweets from those we admire are not all genius, yeah bagels etc but we are all just plain human all tweets are not "homeruns" Not everything you write resonates as truth (seriously with this 'lame write'/opinion piece).
Wherever you go there are the abusers to any system/ interface for social networking.
Focus of the great value and maybe write when you have fully researched a topic so you can appear to be actually a bit more informed, you'd spare making a fool of yourself as you have done with this piece.
Good if there is a society-altering property to tweets. But it just isn't very obvious right now. It looks instead a lot like something Paris Hilton would invent. Or get addicted to. Thank goodness we're speeding out of The Paris Era. To... reality? I mean REAL reality...?
Lee, I use Twitter for many reasons but I have found it to be a motivating tool, not a time waster. If I have a day that I seem stuck, I just tell people to encourage me. At the same time, I have found resources and people that I would never have known existed without Twitter. I have been helped by both regular people like myself and the big names on Twitter. I found people to be generous and helpful.
I wouldn't have known about this article if @danschwabel hadn't posted a link to it. I would think that you would be greatful that you have a greater chance of being read because of Twitter.
We'll forgive you for writing about what you didn't experience on your own and perhaps some day you will feel a desire to write a new article about the benefits of Twitter because you became one of us!
A pet peeve: the use (per ctdar3 above), or rather misuse of the word "community." Sharing a common interest does not constitute a community. Sharing a communication device does not constitute a community.
But maybe the ubiquitous misuse of this word belies that fact that there aren't any real communities left, and that anything that smacks of association will be awarded that concept.
Well done, Lee Woodruff.
The problem with journalists like David Gregory, Terry Moran, and whoever else does such nonsense is that they now have come to believe the masses really care about what they're doing "right now;" and, frankly, when journalists get this narcissistic and have a following of tweeters (or twits) who actually do care, they're no longer worth "a perfectly coiled bowel movement in the bowl after the first morning cup of Joe."
You think Walter Conkite tweets or would ever dream of doing so?
Twitter has many uses - I get constant (and short) news updates from Politico, MSNBC, RAW and Afternet with links to the articles if I want to read further - better than RSS. If the Daily Beast Twittered it's new articles, I'd be a "follower."
Plus as a humor writer, it forces me to try to be funny in 140 characters or less - practice Ms Woodruff could use - and collect my jokes throughout the day to later add to my website (there's a Twitter Widget on my site so visitors can see them as I write them).
joymars,
dictionary.com lists 8 different legitimate definitions for the word "community".
http://tinyurl.com/dy9ged
do you think that maybe ctdar3 is using a different definition than the one you're thinking of?
I have lived without twittering or facebook and am doing fine thank you very much. Just getting on to blogs and commenting is enough for me.
kilroy,
I am well aware of the malleability of language, and that in less than a generation definitions and connotations change. But change this word has undergone is a particularly telling one, and not for the good. Every time I hear the word "community" used now it never fails to remind me of how community-poor we really are. How essentially isolated.
The digital world creates isolation and then attempts to solve it. Show me how and where this is REALLY happening. "You are what you work on" -- like "You are what you eat." We are all speeding toward... what?
this piece totally nails it... as a recovered Facebook and myspace user, I came to realize that the people that were real knew how to pick up a phone, write an email direct or even see me in person... If you're constantly on your blackberry or computer twittering, etc. then maybe you should seriously consider unplugging and going out to get some real life with real family and friends.
Kilroy thinks Twitter and its ilk makes a people smarter than its government. Not when the government jams communications leaves you in the dark. Then you'll be wishing you'd gotten your Ham radio skills tuned. Techno dweeb.
AtomicLaura,
"Kilroy thinks Twitter and its ilk makes a people smarter than its government."
woah, woah, woah. I said no such thing.
twitter is a technology and can't make you smarter in the same way that a vacuum cleaner can't make you smarter.
I encourage you to read Pundita's article. The one I clearly referred to:
http://tinyurl.com/cfqbm6
She is a very well known and respected blogger and far more articulate than me.
After you've read it, I'd be interested in what you think.
joymars,
you are equivocating. ctdar3 used a legitimate definition of the word "community" correctly.
I do like your contemplation on society, though.
People who write pieces like this make it completely obvious that they have no clue, not one sliver of comprehension as to what makes Twitter attractive.
The point of a pull style, configurable communications channel is that it gives you the ability to instantly block out noise. I don't have to watch commercials or hear your spin. This scares people like Ms. Woodruff to death because, my gosh, how do I make myself sound important in only 140 characters? And did you just say that people can tune m out with the click of a button and never have to hear from me again?
Does David Gregory have anything better to do than tweet about his day-to-day existence? Does Lee Woodruff have anything better to do than blather mindlessly about something she clearly doesn't understand?
I remember books. They are heavy things. They take up space, and they kill trees. I remember magazines and newspapers too. They are going bankrupt because they embrace tradition over efficiency and efficacy. You write for the Daily Beast! Do you think this stuff gets put onto paper?
@AtomicLaura
The thing I don't quite comprehend, is why do you have to "recover" from Facebook and MySpace? Is moderation and optimization a foreign concept to you?
Technological progress is embraced when its usefulness becomes apparent. Facebook's utility is known, just like that of the telephone which you speak so highly of. If you spent endless hours each day talking to distant acquaintances on the phone for no particular reason, would you blame the phone? Would you have to "recover" from it and regress to communication by paper mail?
@joymars
Does having this discussion with people on the Daily Beast add value to your life? Is it interesting? You have left more than one comment, including a response, so you must see some kind of value in this. If I referred to the readers of the Daily Beast as a community, meaning we are interested in carrying on this discussion with one another over a period of time, and we return to a common (virtual) location to have it, would I be totally incorrect?
kilroy,
Equivocating? When I first learned the word "community" it was NEVER used in the abstract. Never. For instance, there was never a "dog-lovers' community." This usage started EXACTLY when real communities ceased to function.
I remember this. It is not a comforting thing to remember.
Thank you.
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