Blogs and Stories
The War Over Black Hair
Courtesy of Roadside Attractions
With Chris Rock's new documentary in theaters tomorrow, The Daily Beast's Elizabeth Gates looks back on her own hair struggles, from "bushy afro" to "comb through" to au naturel.
Chris Rock has done the unthinkable and lifted the veil from the myth, the legend, and the big business behind black hair. On October 9, his documentary, Good Hair, will make its way to theaters across the country, finally setting the record straight on block braids, fusains, perms, weaves, and even Al Sharpton’s lye-laden coif. But beneath the hilarity of Atlanta’s biggest hair show and Nia Long’s “sewn in” weave lies the still-unanswered question of why America has all but ostracized natural black hair from its popular beauty ideal, and how we can instill pride in our children’s self image when silky haired blondes still outnumber “kinky” haired black women onscreen and in magazines by a staggering number.
Rock’s decision to make the film was prompted by his daughter Lola, who at age 5 asked her father, “Why don’t I have good hair?” She had already started the treacherous journey to make sense of herself amid America’s whitewashed beauty standards—the same journey many black girls begin the day someone asks to touch our hair or questions why we don’t wash it daily. This is not to say that white women don’t suffer some level of beauty confusion when coming of age, but by the time they can say Hannah Montana, they’ve seen a bit of their possible future, whereas we could go years before seeing reflections of our natural selves on the big screen. And quite frankly, watching Beyoncé flip her lace-front wig around in videos like “Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)” doesn’t exactly translate to a young black girl, seated in front of her parents' TV with two large afro puffs springing from her tender head. All she sees is skin like hers and hair like theirs, inadvertently creating the want for perms, weaves, wigs, lace fronts or otherwise.
Unable to answer his daughter, Rock decided to tour the country interviewing folks at hair salons, barbershops, Asian-owned beauty-supply stores—traveling as far as India (where some of the best weaves originate), to discover why black women have literally bought into the idea that straight hair is not only prettier but also more acceptable than the hair we’re born with. His findings are a riot, but they also start to chip away at the psychology behind black hair and why, as Sharpton says in the film, we happily “comb our oppression” and spend thousands of dollars on anti-curling agents from hot combs to chemical relaxers—both of which could serve as a weapon if need be.
I can only speak for myself, a biracial woman who has always considered herself black (without exception). I was born to a white hippie mother and a black academic father and despite the fact that my black grandmother was a hairdresser and tried her best to oil down my bushy afro, my mother always washed it clean and let it “go.” And I mean, she’d let it go for days. As an artist (still nursing that white, liberal “come as you are,” “black is beautiful” hangover from the '70s), she thought my untamed (and widely socially unacceptable) afro was amazin'—however difficult it was to navigate with a fine-tooth comb. My sister, on the other hand, was born with “good” hair to go along with her fair skin. It hung down her back like the silk they pull from corn stalks, and it had the nerve to be blond too. It bounced when she ran; it wound easily into pigtails (like the ones on TV) and best of all it looked just like my mother’s. I could jump up and down for hours and my afro stayed put. Yanking it into pigtails wasn’t ever going to happen and the best I got when it came to family resemblance was, “that child sure does look like her daddy.”
The few times my mother did attempt to tame my hair it became a battle. She would chase me down, pin me between her knees and rake my hair into one large poof. She even tried to straighten it once, but I ended up with a frizzy, crimped disaster that sent me straight to the shower to undo the damage. I wanted a perm and she loved my curls. By age 13, my mother had tired of our consistent war over my hair and accepted my father’s barber’s offer to have his wife perm my hair. Here was my big moment: my silky, long-haired, afro-be-gone moment. She decided I needed a “comb through,” which meant it would be straightened from the root to the tip (even better in my mind). I slid into the chair and she wrapped me with a black cape, tipped my head over and slathered the creamy white chemical onto my scalp. At first it was all good. I was gnawing away at the Twizzlers she offered me, swinging my legs and listening to her talk trash about her husband to the other hairdressers. But not 10 minutes in, it started to burn. Burn like you wouldn’t even believe. A burn so bad my eyes started to water and my fists clenched up—I mean, I could literally feel the epidermal layer peel away from the dermis.
John Talks Joe
Lloyd Grove is editor at large for The Daily Beast. He is also a frequent contributor to New York magazine and was a contributing editor for Condé Nast Portfolio. He wrote a gossip column for the New York Daily News from 2003 to 2006. Prior to that, he wrote the Reliable Source column for the Washington Post, where he spent 23 years covering politics, the media, and other subjects.
Morehouse College's Gay Travesty
Elizabeth Gates is a style correspondent for The Daily Beast. She is a graduate of The New School University and a former intern at Vogue magazine.
Duh! Of Course Fashion's Racist
Elizabeth Gates is a style correspondent for The Daily Beast. She is a graduate of The New School University and a former intern at Vogue magazine.
Backstage Beauty
Elizabeth Gates is a style correspondent for The Daily Beast. She is a graduate of The New School University and a former intern at Vogue magazine.
I think you might have missed Chris Rock's point. He was asked directly if African-American women get their hair straightened because they would like to look like White women. His response had more nuisance than your article. Including the fact that many women do it because it makes their hair more manageable.
Although you say you always considered yourself Black, it sounds like you went through a lot of problems with your identity and having a White mother. So it's rather curious that when your father re-married he married another White woman. If you grew up in a household where you felt inferior it sounds rather insensitive of your father to then again place you in the same situation. Perhaps he was too busy heading up an entire department at Harvard to pay attention to his home life. I guess that's what therapy is for!
Crymeariver, your comments are awfully mean. Why? I think this is a well written, and well thought out article. Bravo Elizabeth for being so honest about dealing with a difficult topic such as self image, and particularly self image of a mixed race person. Crymeariver, why do you find these reflections so upsetting? Many of us are mixed race and, like Elizabeth, have thought about our mother vs. our father's characteristics. Don't you think that is why the President is such a deep thinker on racial issues- because he comes from a mixed race background and can put himself in many people's shoes? The fact that someone is "a mutt like me", as the President would say, is not something to attack a person about - it is the way America is today and it is in fact why this is a great country, getting greater every day, because we have such diversity and wealth of experiences.
did you mean "nuance"? also - its really rude to insinuate that the race of the person anyone falls in love with is a choice on their part.
By the way, I grew up in Baltimore, and a regular conversation topic among white girls was "what would you do with your hair if you were black?"
I usually opted for an afro or the small buns in square sections - so cute!
I may have had white hair, but it wasn't the hair I saw on television either. All we could do was have a pony-tail or wear it down whereas our black friends had seemingly endless options. We were very jealous indeed, so I guess it runs both ways, at least a little.
This is an unfair comment and a low blow to the author. Obviously, the person who wrote this knew the author personally at one time.It is too bad the person responding had to say such uncalled for comments. Comments posted should only refer to the article itself not intimate things related to the author. Bravo on a well thought through and well written article.
Why do biracial people always "claim" the black side of their family? Seems to me that you would be proud of both sides instead of identify with one side "without exception" as you put it. After all it took both sides to make you who you are.
It's not about choice, it's about history:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-miscegenation
In this country, the standard was "one drop of black blood" made someone black. The term "bi-racial" is very new.
In this country Blacks were also once enslaved and called various names but we no longer do that. So the only people keeping the "one drop" rule alive are Blacks.
However it seems like the author of this piece felt inferior to her mother and thus rejected that half of herself altogether. I can't imagine growing up and hating my mother because I didn't look EXACTLY like her.
Can't agree. Most "black" people in America are about half white. Bob Marley is exactly half and so is Obama but when someone with that look steps into any office, school, playground or street, people see them as a black person. If someone of that skin color and with those features said to everyone, "I'm not black, I'm white" people would think they were in denial of sorts. Growing up in Canada there were only a few "black" kids, in fact they were all half white, but it didn't stop everyone from thinking of them as black.
TV, movies and music videos are dominated by lighter skinned black; it's only recently that much darker skinned black people like Wesley Snipes have been able to get roles other than as a bad guy.
"I'm not black, I'm white" people would think they were in denial of sorts. Growing up in Canada there were only a few "black" kids, in fact they were all half white, but it didn't stop everyone from thinking of them as black.
_______________
And they should care what other people think because...? There used to be lots of people who would refer to Blacks using the N-word and some who still think of them that way but that didn't stop them from saying that's NOT who they are. It seems wrong to internalize what others LABEL you as and then simply go along when you no longer have to. Some East Indians look Latino but still take the time to correct people who mislabel them.
Not all of them do. I've seen some that completely turn their backs on the "black" side. I'm not biracial, but I think it would be easier to claim the "white" side and not the "black."
This may be true where you live at, but I'm finding that biracial people - particularly girls - who grow up in areas where there are few other black people are increasingly leaning towards their white sides. This phenomenon (if you can call it that) is growing now that we're entering an era where it's becoming more and more acceptable for blacks not to conform to black stereotypes (like young black men growing up in small white towns turning out like hip hop video-styled caricatures, which I've seen far too may times to count).
Biracial kids choose their black heritage over their white, because they never get accepted by white people as being white. My biracial children tell me this all the time. They told me all through K-12, college, and even the military they were always seen by white people as mixed or black.
I'm not sure why you are going after her father to make a minor point.
Black woman and hair is personal. It varies from one woman to the next. She has a right to share her point of view about her hair-story without you judging the entire family and the kitchen sink.
India Aria - has a great song, "I am not my hair" - worth a listen.
Cry - my, my how catty you are. Jealous?
'Manageable' in whose book? Your hair is what it is - which was the crux of this article - and is part of ones identity; despite what style it is, it will be managed. Getting to the point of accepting how you are is the goal.
As to your second comment - did she sound like she felt 'inferior'?
What your parents do with their life can have a limited impact on your identity building - I would say that your peers have a much greater impact. Whether or not Prof. Gates married a white woman - identity is something that is an internal journey. Your comment is silly in the extreme - if Professor Gates was a serial killer then would you expect her to align her identity with killing? Of course not, so who he fell in love with, has nothing with Elisabeth's finding and enjoying her own identity.
Heading up a department in Harvard is a job not everyone can do - kudos to him! Would you be happier if he headed up a department at Howard University?
You obviously read a different article than the one currently posted here. I am so sorry for you.
instead of feeling sorry for me - read the article again with my suggestion in mind. Use your imagination.
Identity is much more complex than hair - or what your parents do.
crymeariver speaks just like i used to sound when my hair was straightened. what you dont even know is that you are lying to yourself if you are a woman with naturally curly hair who chemically straightens it. i didnt know how to take care of my natural hair...heck, i didnt even know what my natural hair even felt like. it is a liberating experience to cut off your permed hair and the primary support that i received was from my family and my white boyfriend (i'm an afri-amer).
ms. gates completely captured the point of the film and i dont think that you have. too many black woman claim that they straighten their hair for manageability when they really covet the american standard of beauty, which is unfortunately not traditionally afri-amer kinky hair. it is not a conscious choice that you want to be white really. i am not claiming that. but when the majority of mainstream haircare products and styles are based upon fine, straight hair you can definitely succumb to the pressure as so many of my sisters do. it is really really sad.
BRAVO MS. GATES
Excellent points Sonora. Thanks for sharing.
As a black man who came of age during the "black is beautiful" 1960s, I find what black women are doing to their hair very disgusting. Not only are they saying they hate what God gave us, they are also letting others define our beauty standards. Worse still, it doesn't make them look more beautiful. Many look like chocolate-covered white women.
Hard to believe that during the late '60s even black women with so-called good hair tried their damndest to "fro it up." While I know we'll never go back to a time where we're all wearing Afros (which were originally called "naturals") I hope this film will awaken some black minds to what is really beautiful. Maybe it will take us black men to say "enough."
I agree with itstrue! The grass is always greener, I suppose, but I longed to have hair that could be styled into interesting and glamorous shapes. But then I never had to sit with lye on my scalp for hours to satisfy a beauty ideal that couldn't be achieved otherwise. Says more about our society than any snarky thing crymeariver might be trying to say. By the way, c, check with your thesaurus before hitting submit on your mean comments. Who cares who the writer's dad chooses to marry?
great article, liza!! i had black/carribbean roommates all through college and until then i had NO IDEA what black women do/don't do to their hair. i can't wait to see the movie - thanks for setting it up!!
This article is particularly interesting because black hair - like much of black culture - often goes without critique for fear of being "rude" or seen as a racist. I realize that Ms. Gates is black (as she says), but it was wonderful for her to use her voice in this way.
I grew up in the South and only recently moved to NYC (I work in the fashion industry) and there aren't ANY black women in my office and even I was shocked (coming from the South you'd assume I wouldn't have been) but I truly think its b/c we don't "understand" each other and it is great articles like this that give us links to each other's thoughts.
In fact, when I look at the writers on the beast it seems that Gates is the only black female writer there too. Again, i'm white and southern, but that might be a bit difficult for her, no?
I loved the piece. Great job, Gates.
there is another woman of colour writer, her name is Patricia J. Williams, occasionally writes articles for the daily beast!!
I really love the personal style of this piece, Ms. Gates. Your article is funny and touching, and I appreciate your candor on this topic. Whether or not it's to "look white," it is an undeniable fact that black women (and men) have spent centuries torturing themselves to achieve a certain beauty ideal. And as itstrue points out, white women have been known to do the same, with perms and the like. Regardless of the reason, it seems to be a common experience to many women in America, which Ms. Gates shows through her own experience. I really like this article!!
Also, to crymeariver, who is this alleged white woman Ms. Gates's father is married to? He has yet to remarry, and his partner is Mexican. Get your facts straight before chiming in.
Shibby and itstrue-thanks for the correction yes I did mean nuance, but I guess you both consider me a nuisance for my comments!
The View devoted almost an entire show to Chris Rock's documentary and had a lot of discussion on Black hair. Both Whoppi Goldberg and Sherri Shepherd kept emphasizing the fact that MOST Black women straighten their hair for style and manageability. Whereas Barbara Walters' claimed that what SHE got out of the documentary was that Black women were doing these things to their hair because they wanted to look White. Walters was taking this writer's point of view that it is a form self-hate. Chris Rock came in the middle and said what he learned was that Black women straighten their hair and used hair weaves for LOTS of different reasons. You are free to watch the segment and judge for yourself.
http://abc.go.com/watch/the-view/167365/237327/the-view-107
Black women just like White women are complex human-beings, but this writer goes too far in simplifying the matter. It seems that her story has more to do with her biracial genetics and her apparent feelings of inferiority next to her White mother. When you become a parent your children are supposed to come first in your life. If my choice of spouses caused emotional damage to my child, the LAST thing I would do is to go ahead and make the same choice. You don't have a choice in who you fall in love with but you DO have a choice as to who you marry and bring home to your children.
Anyway her story just sounds sad but I'm not sure it is very representative of the average Black woman. It would have been better to have both her view as well as a woman who was the product of two Black parents and compare.
I would say most Black women and their hair is not always a happy bow-tied story. It is as complex as our kinks and curls. There is a history and stigma that is attached to it - whichever way you wear it. Rather you grow up in a multiracial household or not. Because you are dealing with larger society point of view as well as a cultural point of view.
How many Black celebrities do you see with their 'natural' hair? Very few. Have you ever wondered why that is?
Mercy1981: I would say most Black women and their hair is not always a happy bow-tied story. It is as complex as our kinks and curls.
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That's my point, as is that of Chris Rock's documentary. This writer simplifies the issue down to "self-hatred" and rejection of Blackness. This is the ONLY article on the topic and perhaps the only view that most people on this website will read. I'm sure AA women won't appreciate people walking around thinking they have straight hair because they hate their race. Tina Brown has segments were she has MULTIPLE writers state their view on a specific topic. She should have done the same with this topic.
In regards to Black celebrities: as Whoppi, Sherri, and Chris Rock pointed out, their hair is fragile and cannot stand up to the DAILY heat required when filming, being on a t.v. show, or modeling. I'm sure it is also due to wanting to fit in and look like everyone else. Again a complex issue not just self-hate.
http://abc.go.com/watch/the-view/167365/237327/the-view-107
This notion that Black women straighten their hair to achieve "manageable" hair, is a big LIE! I am African American and have very curly (kinky) and very soft hair. I have had all of my hair fall out several times during my 50 plus years,starting at age 11. I now constantly wear my hair natural, in braids, cornrows or afro style. If Black women keep their hair moisturized and oiled, they will have absolutely NO problem at all managing their hair. The reason some women do have trouble combing "Black" hair is because they don't understand HAIR! Period! Hair is composed of 70% water, just like our bodies. It must stay moisturized to be healthy and manageable. The whole notion of running a fine tooth comb through curly hair is silly. Why would you need to do this. Finger combed black hair that is conditioned is more than sufficient. Just be honest ladies and admit that you want your hair straight and limp. Don't try to act as if you "MUST" straighten your hair to be able to comb or style it!
Seriously?? you can't use your hair to gauge black women hair. and you obviously haven't met a lot of black women with kinky (in the African sense of the word, which i think is different from your meaning) or nappy hair. and not every black hair is curly or soft!!
Preach it!
I am a "black" woman with a biracial family heritage (grandmother-biracial). Both of parents were black but my mother does not have kinky hair it is fine,mainly straight but blah! I inherited the same hair. It can not go into and afro or kinky styles, but it is not straight enough to go into so called "white" styles. Guess what? I perm my hair to MANAGE it!
In addition, I am suprised that no one has mentioned that black MEN texturize and perm their hair-but it is for waves etc. what's the difference??
For the record, I am not lieing to myself, I do not have underlying white issues. I am happy with who I am and am not-God made me! Many women feel like I do. What is the difference between perming our hair or putting on make-up etc. I like flexibility, versatility and beauty. The article was well written, but what needs to be discussed such as on the view by people who actually represent us is- the race issues.
My wife - who has only been in North America for about 4 years now - is always shocked by the number of black women here who straighten their hair. On the flip side, however, as a Brazilian daughter of two mixed-race parents who also considers herself black, she can't understand why she constantly receives so many compliments on her own hair - the type of soft, long and loose curls that are all the rage in the fashion world these days. I keep having to remind her that blacks with her complexion and hair are hardly the norm here (though a quick look at the next generation coming up tells me that this is rapidly changing), and that while it's easy to criticize others for trying to find a way to feel comfortable with their tightly curled locks, she should probably check just how hard she comes down on people who's position she'll never find herself in given her own racial make-up.
I like straight hair on women regardless of 'race' and envy men that look good with their heads shaved regardless of 'race'. Not that my preference should concern anyone else.
Ivy - Disappointed
Baby for the first time
I'm falling, falling for the last time
Half dead on the inside, feels like nothings left at all
Half smile on the outside, then it's gone
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
Could it be that this time?
We're just longing, longing for the first time
It's been such a long night
Now we're sleeping back again
No matter how we try, to pretend
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
I could never see what you wanted from me, all you're going to be is disappointed
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
Half dead on the inside, feels like nothings left at all
Half smile on the outside, then it's gone
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
I could never be what you want me to be, I'm just going to leave you disappointed
I could never see what you wanted from me, all you're going to be is disappointed
(and on and on...)
When will the blacks in America stop blaming white people in America (and around the world) for their problems?
Ms Gates, sounding much like her racist dad, blames white people for not liking her hair? Beauty standards shift and maybe one day nappy hair will be considered attractive. Demeaning white people for having silky hair or light eyes is simply wrong.
Get a grip Gates; like yourself for who you are (or not) but stop intimating that white people control you. You're not a slave. White people don't give a flying leap about your bad hair.
Good on you. I cut my own hair as well. My kid's hair too.
Can't believe some of the whackjob comments I'm reading around here...
It my be politically incorrect to say this, but I've always been curious about "black" hair and what options people have for styling it. Of everything I've seen, I like when black women wear their hair naturally but closely cropped. I think it looks very elegant and neat, traits I like on any head of hair!
crymeariver - I just don't understand why you would even think of making a judgement about this writer's father, and I didn't read anything in the piece that would indicate a sense of inferiority to the mother or father. She was talking about hair, not family hierarchy. And she stated very clearly that the piece is about her own experience. Nothing else.
And as some of the commentators have pointed out in this discussion, most black people in this country have white people somewhere in their backgrounds. It's not seen as sad, and I think Ms. Gates' story might be more representative of average black women than not.
And don't we all fret about our hair? How many blonds are born that way? How many perms are sold every year, how many extensions ? Don't go so far in your strange analysis of this writer's family dynamic on the basis of this article.
Unless you have other issues.
Shibby,
half of her article is about her family and her identity. Her comments about her mother and sister are completely negative and disparaging. Growing up in a household with that level of envy and jealousy towards your mother regardless of her race is sad. I would feel the same way if the person writing the article were a White woman talking about her White mother. Either way we are not going to change each other's minds, let's just agree to disagree.
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I was born to a white hippie mother and a black academic father and despite the fact that my black grandmother was a hairdresser and tried her best to oil down my bushy afro, my mother always washed it clean and let it "go." And I mean, she'd let it go for days. As an artist (still nursing that white, liberal "come as you are," "black is beautiful" hangover from the '70s), she thought my untamed (and widely socially unacceptable) afro was amazin'-however difficult it was to navigate with a fine-tooth comb. My sister, on the other hand, was born with "good" hair to go along with her fair skin. It hung down her back like the silk they pull from corn stalks, and it had the nerve to be blond too. It bounced when she ran; it wound easily into pigtails (like the ones on TV) and best of all it looked just like my mother's. I could jump up and down for hours and my afro stayed put. Yanking it into pigtails wasn't ever going to happen and the best I got when it came to family resemblance was, "that child sure does look like her daddy."
Ridiculous. There's no envy or jealousy about the fact that the sisters and mother are different, nor were the comments about her mother and sister 'negative and disparaging'. It's the case in every family that the children favor one parent or the other, and you made nasty judgments about the author based on god knows what and the discussion on the view. We do disagree, and your comments were out of line.
ms gates wrote a very insightful and thorough article. the myth surrounding black hair is neverending, after i am introduced to anyone the first words out their mouth is always 'is that your real hair?'[if i got a nickel each time this question is asked i would be bill gates rich] ,as for crymeariver jealous much! people hair is what u make of it whether weave , natural, or permed, kinky,etc. TO THY OWN SELF BE TRUE, BE HAPPY WITH U! I had to explain to my beautiful daughter at nine why we both had different hair texures. she has short hair like her father while i have long hair like my father[which by the way is all mine]. so i commend ms gates for addressing her issues positively and just maybe now we as black women can embrace ourselves in a better view.
to CRYMEARIVER - the lady doth protest too much
Me and my friends have come to the conclusion that although chris rock has a point, black women have never been anything to him except the butt of his jokes and although this quest may have started as a conversation between him and his daughter, it has ended once again as blackwomen being the butt of his jokes and and the money making idea that he wants it to be. The subject of self love should be addressed by mothers and daughters and the people who love them, not a comedian bent on their denigrations as a means to make money. Sorry, I didnt read the article, just commenting on the movie and the convo's that have been going around about it in my circle.
I think black women with shaved heads are some of the most beautiful women on earth.
awesome piece. I begged my mom for a perm when I was 13 and went hard in the paint for 10 years. something after my corporate experience struck a nerve in me to just do me. that meant (for me) to stop fronting. I had a gorgeous - past my shoulders, flowing - I mean gorgeous perm, but there were some places where the chemical use had damaged my ends and scalp. Plus, I love black people and our culture and history so something just didn't seem right about getting a perm after a while. Been natural for 4 years now and my kinks are soft, manageable (whatever that means) and growing like crazy! my boyfriend adores it, and he was around when I was still permed out. since talking about black people ALWAYS necessitates talking about white people (why is that?) I'd like to say that most white folks love it and what to touch it (*sigh*) and hate on the multitudes of styles I rock.
i am so sick and tired of people trying to dictate how black women wear our hair...we wear weaves,relax,fry and dye, because we have something God gave us all people.. free-will.... it has nothing to do with self-hate people!!!! do whites have self hate if they have a tan.. we can wear our straight hair, natural, or no hair at all.... self love comes from within
Thank you.
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