President Bush's former No. 2 State Department official says he hopes he would have had "the courage to resign" if he knew the CIA was using waterboarding, a torture tactic, to interrogate suspects. Richard Armitage, the former deputy secretary of state, told Al Jazeera English in an interview airing Wednesday he doesn't think CIA agents who interrogated using waterboarding should be prosecuted, even though he thinks it was torture. The White House and the Justice Department signed off on the CiA waterboarding of three terror detainees in 2002 and 2003. "I hope, had I known about it at the time I was serving, I would've had the courage to resign. But I don't know. It's in hindsight now," Armitage said. Armitage left his post the day after Colin Powell resigned, shortly after Bush's re-election in 2004. Armitage said in the interview that the State Department was in the dark about the abuse of prisoners until the Abu Ghraib scandal broke in April 2004. President Obama has ended the CIA interrogation program and approved a one-year deadline for the closure of the Guantanamo Bay Naval Base prison. CIA Director Leon Panetta said last week that the secret sites where detainees were waterboarded are being shut down and that no CIA employees will be prosecuted for their role at the sites.

You know the bipartisanship is deep when a minority-party governor starts talking secession. At a "tea party" tax protest in Austin today, Texas Governor Rick Perry did just that. The Huffington Post reports that an "animated" Perry, speaking before a flag-waving crowd cheering "secede!" called the protesters "patriots" and said that Texas' joined the United States in 1845 with the understanding that it could pull out whenever it wanted to -- like when the national government chooses a tax policy against Lone Star's liking. "We've got a great union," Perry said. "There's absolutely not reason to dissolve it. But if Washington continues to thumb their nose at the American people, you know, who knows what might come out of that. But Texas is a very unique place, and we're a pretty independent lot to boot." Austin's tea party is part of a national movement to protest President Obama's tax plan, inspired by the historic Boston Tea Party as well as CNBC personality Rick Santelli who first advocated such protest on his television show. Governor Perry is among the GOP governors rejecting portions of the stimulus and faces a steep re-election battle against fellow Republican Senator Kay Bailey Hutchison in 2010. Texas' last secession, in 1861, ended when the North won the Civil War.

Watch out, pirates, Hillary Clinton is after your booty. The Secretary of State vowed the Obama administration is going to fight back against pirates by seizing their property and assets. "These pirates are criminals, they are armed gangs on the sea. And those plotting attacks must be stopped," she said. "We may be dealing with a 17th-century crime, but we need to bring 21st-century solutions to bear." The plan to thwart Somali hijackings has been criticized for being symbolic, since tracking and freezing pirate assets would be near impossible due to the very local and informal nature of their economy. This tougher stance will not address the political and economic instability in Somalia, which are piracy's root causes, Clinton said. But increasing attacks on ships, especially the attack on the U.S.-flagged Maersk Alabama, call for immediate action. Part of Clinton's plan involves immediate meetings of an international anti-piracy task force to organize more naval coordination against pirates. Federal agencies will meet Friday to discuss their strategy before an international conference on Somali piracy next week. The United States "does not make concessions or ransom payments to pirates," she added.

The Blago saga continues its inevitable plummet towards self-parody: Ousted Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich is seeking a role on Survivor-like NBC show I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! reports the Associated Press. Unfortunately, since Blago faces the possibility of years in prison on corruption charges, he'll need a federal judge's permission first. The show will film in Costa Rica, where the show’s stars will cavort in the wilderness performing various survival-themed tasks that we can only hope would involve mussing the crooked politico’s famously coiffed hair. Blago's political peers are disgusted but not surprised. Illinois Representative Lou Lang (D) said Blago needs the money for his defense fund—and the attention for his pathological ego. "I can guarantee you I will not be watching," said Lang, a former Blago supporter. "I think it's disgusting." If Blago makes it on the show, he'll have stiff competition for the spotlight: Rumor has it figure skating star Nancy Kerrigan will be on the next season.

He led the 1990s crackdown on illegal border crossings, and now former U.S. attorney and Justice Department official Alan Bersin will be America’s first “border czar,” in charge of overseeing efforts to quell drug cartel activity on the U.S.-Mexico border and to diminish illegal immigration. Appointed today by Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano, Bersin and Napolitano pulled a Strasbourg and gave a presser on a bridge over the Rio Grande that connects the U.S. to Mexico. Speaking in both Spanish and English, Bersin cautioned against overstating the cartels’ threat to the U.S., pointing out that violent spillover north of the border has been relatively low. Bersin dismissed some people’s calls for America to position troops on the Mexican border: “The posse comitatus have served this country well,” he said, referring to the legal statutes that keep the U.S. military from operating as law enforcement stateside. Both Bersin and Napolitano were U.S. attorneys during the Clinton administration. Bersin’s Justice Department service included border patrol increases in the American southwest and San Diego. Earlier, he was superintendent of the San Diego public school system.

Desperate to escape the Colombian authorities, Don Mario—described by President Alvaro Uribe as "one of the most feared drug traffickers in the world—offered $1,000 for every killed cop on his trail. But the law (or at least what passes for it) eventually caught up to him, and Don Mario, who had a $2 million bounty on his head, was found "cowering like a dog" under a tree in northern Colombia. Don Mario, a.k.a. Daniel Rendon Herrera, was the boss of a paramilitary organization thought to be responsible for 3,000 murders in the last 18 months. The arrest marks a major coup for Uribe, who now has orchestrated the disarmament of most paramilitary organizations and the arrests of the leaders that refused to lay down their weapons.

Baby, he's a rich man. To acknowledge Tax Day, the White House released the Obamas' and Bidens' tax returns. In 2008, the Obamas had an adjusted gross income of $2,657,000 and paid some $855,000 in federal income taxes (32% of their income). 6.5% of their income ($172,000) went to charity, including $25K each to CARE and the United Negro College Fund. By contrast, the Bidens earned $269,000 in 2008 ($183,300 after taxes) but donated a mere $1,900 to charity, less than 1% of their eranings. The White House issued a statement explaining the Bidens' seeming tight-fistedness: "They donate to their church, and they contribute to their favorite causes with their time, as well as their checkbooks."

A "suspicious package" thrown over the fence into the White House's North Lawn today was a box of tea bags, the Secret Service reports, part of a national movement to protest President Obama's tax plans. Though the tea parties—meant to emulate the Boston Tea Party and sparked by CNBC host Rick Santelli's February call for tea-themed protest—have been hotly anticipated and attracted the enthusiasm of many on the right, turn out has been rather light: About 1,000 people showed up in Washington DC and 100 gathered on Staten Island. Some 300 protests have been scheduled in 50 states, including restaging of the original Boston Tea Party in Boston Harbor. But is this grassroots populism, or do the tea partiers' commands come from the top? Democrats argue that, not only do most of these protesters stand to receive tax cuts from President Obama, but their movement is being organized by traditional Republican leaders.

Democrats in Alaska aren't budging in their battle against Governor Sarah Palin over an open Senate seat. Yesterday, Palin submitted three names—two of whom were already nixed by the Democrats—for approval before an appointment can be made. Today, Democrats determined Palin's triple threat strategy is illegal. "There is nothing for us to vote on, there is no appointment," explained Senate Judiciary Chairman Hollis French of Anchorage. "The governor has taken an unusual course which is outside the law and leaves us no choice but to ignore what she's done." Palin needs a majority of support from the nine Senate Democrats to proceed.

President Obama’s willingness to talk with Iran is considered a change of course, but did President Bush also do so behind the scenes? In an interview with Dar Al-Hayat, Ahmad al-Chalabi, the Iraqi politician who clamored for the overthrow of Saddam Hussein, says “I am convinced that Saddam would not have fallen except for an implicit agreement between America and Iran.” When asked if this happened, Chalabi says “of course it did” and that he, the Supreme Council, and Jalal Talbani worked on it. Chalabi also describes Bush as “a man with very little skill and knowledge.” In 2004, it was reported that Chalabi gave US state secrets to Iran, though he denies the charges.

In a new interview with Rolling Stone, Hulk Hogan describes the moment he realized that estranged wife Linda Bollea, 48, was leaving him for “some shaggy-haired pool boy 30 years her junior,” and it sounds like the Hulk was this close to emulating his comic book namesake by flying into a violent rage: “I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like O.J., cutting everybody’s throat,” Hogan said. He described seeking “a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife… I totally understand O.J. I get it.” Last week Hogan appeared in court to request an injunction against Bollea and her boyfriend from driving his cars and boat. An attorney for Bollea said Hogan is being controlling and cruel.

This deserves a teabag, no? Senator Richard Burr of North Carolina said that, when the financial crisis began, he told his wife, “Tonight, I want you go to go the ATM machine, and I want you to draw out everything it will let you take. And I want you to tomorrow, and I want you to Sunday.” In other words, he wanted her to make a run on the bank. Would he have advised his constituents to do the same? His advice was, of course, pointless, since the FDIC insures their deposits, but, had enough people done this, it would have forced banks to fail.

For the first time, our often-ignored neighbors to the south are dealing with an "economic crisis not made in Latin America" and it is likely that at the upcoming Summit of The Americas, many Latin American leaders will make that point clear. The US's long history with the region has been strained from the start. The likes of Hugo Chavez of Venezuela and Evo Morales of Bolivia will be anxious to tout the crisis as the end of "Yanqui" hegemony. Even President Lula of Brazil, who is generally friendly with gringos, caught flack for saying the economic troubles were the fault of "white, blue-eyed bankers" (though it must be said that the much of the meaning of that phrase was lost in translation).

Illinois Representative Aaron Schock is a living example that good looks work in your favor at the workplace, even in Congress. Schock, labeled "the hottest freshman" on Capitol Hill, has already been courted by President Obama, hounded by TMZ, and landed a profile in Details Magazine. In the new profile, the Rep says "There's no line of young ladies at my door in the morning," adding "maybe when they read my Details profile..." Schock also discussed the pressure he feels to cease being a bachelor and settle down—a pressure he will likely ignore given his new celebrity.

President Obama can be boring too, when he needs. For example, today, instead of killing pirates, he’s talking taxes. At a speech today, President Obama said he’s working toward “a simpler tax code that rewards work and the pursuit of the American dream.” “We need to simplify a monstrous tax code that is far too complicated for most Americans to understand, but just complicated enough for the insiders who know how to work the system,” Obama said. “It will take time to undo the damage of years of carve-outs and loopholes. But I want every American to know that we will rewrite the tax code so that it puts your interests over any special interest. And we will make it quicker, easier, and less expensive for you to file a return, so that April 15 is not a date that is approached with dread each year.”

Chicago billionaire Sam Zell has proven quite adept at playing the real estate market but is not so savvy in the media world. His purchase of the Tribune Company has turned out to be a wretched investment, as the company filed for bankruptcy in late last year with $13 billion in debt. Now, Zell is stuck with it, as no one wants to merge with the company, a decision he likened to "asking someone in another business if they want to get vaccinated with a live virus--There's not a long list of people who want to buy newspaper companies today." Zell did have some reasons to be optimistic regarding his fortune while speaking to Bloomberg, though. He said that he sees the housing market beginning to "bottom out."

No wonder Facebook is so nervous. Twitter attracted 9.3 million unique visitors in March—a 131 percent increase from the previous month. This means that the site had more than five million new visitors passing through to see what all the hubbub is about. They didn't all necessarily open up accounts, though. An interesting side note: Twitterers tend to be news junkies, as they are two to three times more likely as average users to visit news sites. CNN alone has 939,000 followers on Twitter.

When American operatives were conducting top secret activities in Southeast Asian countries they had no business being in, they called Air America if things got hairy. The airline, disguised as a civilian company, was actually a CIA service that discreetly supplied and evacuated Americans during the Cold War. Now, the covert airline will be in the spotlight, as a Freedom of Information request by the University of Texas at Dallas has yielded thousands of documents detailing the history of Air America. In one harrowing rescue, Air America pilots managed to rescue a pilot who had to evacuate his plane over rebel territory in Laos after his bomb, meant for the Ho Chi Minh trail, "exploded prematurely."

It’s almost impossible to believe that any national politician, let alone one who ran a relatively successful presidential campaign, would fall for one of Sacha Baren Cohen’s stunts, but then if you had to choose one, we suppose Ron Paul would be the obvious choice. In an interview with ABC Radio, Ron Paul admits that he’ll be appearing in Cohen’s upcoming Bruno: “I was expecting an interview on Austrian economics. So, that didn't turn out that way. But, by the time he started pulling his pants down, I ... What in (inaudible) is going on here? I ran out of the room.” Paul admitted to never hearing of Bruno or of Borat. “Movies I used to see are Sound of Music. Tonight, I was sitting here watching Gone with the Wind.”

Perhaps something like this would have worked well for John McCain when he was choosing a running mate? Alaska Governor Sarah Palin has made the strange move of appointing three people to a single open state Senate seat. The governor must appoint a Juneau Democrat to fill the seat left vacant by Kim Elton, who resigned for a job with the Obama administration. When Tim Grussendorf and Joe Nelson—Palin’s first choices—were rejected, she apparently decided the best thing to do would be to resubmit their names, along with a third, Alan Wilson. Anchorage Democratic Sen. Bill Wielechowski objected that, under the law, Palin can’t appoint three people to the seat. She must pick one. Wilson’s Democratic credentials have also come into question, as it appears that he didn’t register as a Democrat until March 4. Palin has described Wilson as a “successful small businessman and active in the community.”

How long will the Minnesota Senate fight go on? The Democratic National Committee is launching radio ads this morning aimed at pressuring Norm Coleman to concede defeat against Al Franken. "Enough is enough," says the narrator, who describes Franken as the victor of the election and the recount. "Minnesota deserves two Senators and voters deserve to have their verdict stand without delay." The ad, airing on local news radio in the Twin Cities, comes after a three-judge panel sided with Franken.

As if drug violence weren’t a big enough problem, it now seems President Obama has another crisis on his agenda when he visits Mexico tomorrow: Ads for Burger King's new Texican burger, a cheeseburger with chile and spicy mayo, have offended Mexicans, The Independent reports. The ad features a tall white cowboy and a short, squat Mexican wrestler who wears a Mexican flag poncho. The image is intended to show that the burger has "the taste of Texas with a little spicy Mexican." Jorge Zermeno, the Mexican ambassador to Spain, where the ad first aired, was not amused, noting that the ad improperly used "the stereotyped image of a Mexican" and that it misused the Mexican flag, which is heavily protected on its home turf. Zermeno has lodged a formal complaint against Burger King, asking that the ad be removed.

Echoes of 1995: The Department of Homeland Security warns in a new report of a resurgence of right-wing extremist groups fueled by the recession and the election of the nation’s first black president. Their targets? Returning veterans who have “combat skills and experience” and might feel isolated as they have a hard time reintegrating into society amid a job-destroying recession. Homeland Security is also worried about people who are stockpiling weapons in anticipation of stricter gun control laws. The groups are using Obama’s election as a rallying cry, using distorting propaganda to recruit angry members, the report warns. It’s all a chilling reminder of the early 1990s, when a recession and a perceived drop in global prominence caused a spate of right-wing extremist violence that culminated in the Oklahoma City bombings.

A day before Obama makes his first trip to Mexico, the White House is planning to announce Alan Bersin, a former Justice Department official, as “border czar.” Bersin’s No. 1 priority will be controlling illegal immigration, a source tells Politico, but he’ll also tackle drug violence and immigration problems plaguing the U.S.-Mexico border. Bersin, who also served as Attorney General Janet Reno’s border czar, has been criticized by immigration advocacy groups for Operation Gatekeeper, a federal program that cracked down on uncontrolled immigration along the western portion of the border. Critics say the strategy just pushed illegal immigration to the east, where more people died in the desert while attempting to cross into the U.S.

The Catholic community of New York City welcomed Archbishop Timothy Dolan with open arms last night, the eve of his appointment today at St. Patrick's Cathedral to serve as the nation's top figure in the church. Retiring Edward Cardinal Egan, 77, looked on as Dolan, 59, ceremoniously took the reins. "Using a blue hammer, Dolan pounded on the bronze doors six times," the New York Port reports. Then he paused and knocked another three times just to be sure he was heard. A roar of laughter erupted in the church."

Prepare for more transparency: The Obama administration is planning to make public the results of the “stress tests’ being conducted on the country’s 19 biggest banks, a move that would make it easier to tell which banks are thriving and which are barely surviving. The government has made a point of treating all banks equally so as not to spark a bank run on any particular institution; both the strong and the weak received billions from the federal government to mask the fact that some needed the cash much more than others. But if the stress tests are publicized, and if certain big banks like Goldman Sachs are allowed to begin paying back their debts from the TARP, the era of all banks created equal will end.

USA: 2; Pirates: 0. A US-flagged cargo ship was attacked by pirates yesterday, but the attack was repelled without injury. The 738-foot long Liberty Sun sustained damages from rocket-propelled grenades and automatic-weapons fire, but by the time a US Navy Destroyer arrived on the scene, the pirates had already fled. According to a bizarre report, however, China may have an even more awesome weapon on its side to protect its ships: a flock of thousands of dolphins.

Hands off that life-size stuffed giraffe! A week before the contents of pop legend Michael Jackson’s Neverland estate were to be auctioned off, his production company has called the proceedings to a halt. The firm filed a suit in Los Angeles Superior Court claiming that some of Jackson’s things, like a carousel horse signed by Elizabeth Taylor, are “irreplaceable,” and that Jackson never agreed to sell them. The suit was dismissed, but the Beverly Hills auction house, Julien Auctions, has reached an agreement to not sell the items on April 22 as planned, and instead to leave them up on display through April 25. “I think we are going to have a beautiful museum someday for Michael,” Jackson’s spokesman told the Los Angeles Times. Jackson sold Neverland after being found not guilty of child molestation in 2005.

President Bush is out of office, but are his secrets still safe? The Wall Street Journal reports, “The Obama administration is leaning toward keeping secret some graphic details of tactics allowed in Central Intelligence Agency interrogations, despite a push by some top officials to make the information public.” Apparently, Attorney General Eric Holder is in favor of disclosing all the information, which includes approval for a technique in which a prisoner’s head could be slammed against a wall so long as it was being held and the force of the blow was “controlled” by the interrogator. A failure to release the information would anger human-rights groups and leftwing critics.

Who knew big financial companies were hiring? The New York Times reports “both [Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac] are suffering from an exodus of senior and midlevel managers. The companies have been unable to replace executives who have either been pushed aside as part of last year’s government takeover, or who sought refuge at less stigmatized companies offering better pay and a more predictable future.” Freddie Mac is hiring a chief executive, a chief operation officer, and a chief financial officer. Fannie Mae is hiring a general counsel, chief risk officer, and chief technology officer. Frustration, more lucrative opportunities elsewhere, and uncertainty over Freddie’s and Fannie’s futures as public companies have contributed to the flight.

If your endorsement is worthless because of a sullied reputation, can you still sue for unfair use of your image? American Apparel is arguing "no" in a case brought by Woody Allen in response to billboard advertisements it briefly ran in NYC and LA featuring the comedian dressed as a Hasidic Jew. The clothing line's argument is fairly simple--and insulting. Because Allen has already been embroiled in so many humiliating scandals (mainly divorcing his wife, Mia Farrow and marrying her adopted daughter), American Apparel alleges that he has no legal basis to sue for damage of his reputation. American Apparel's lawyers are requesting numerous documents related to Allen's past embarrassments, and explained that "corporate America's desire to have Woody Allen endorse their product is not what he may believe it is."

When bed bugs invade the home, they contaminate all furniture and feast on their victims when they are sleeping. The itching can become so irritating that many flee to their bathtubs to escape the bed bugs' bite. Now, the tiny insects are making a comeback, and the U.S. has convened it's first ever bed bug conference to plan a "surge" against the maddening infestation. Experts attribute the rising problem to the fact that "there are few chemicals approved for use on mattresses that are effective at killing bed bugs." The last time the bugs were a major problem in the U.S was before World War II.