Good news for Democrats—and, possibly, the Gulf region: On Friday afternoon, the House approved, 209-193, a package of offshore-drilling reforms. The legislation represents the largest overhaul of the oil industry in decades and provides talking points for the Democratic Party going into the August recess. “These are the types of votes that make strong commercials,” a Democratic strategist told Politico. Still, not everyone’s pleased with the outcome. Blue Dog Democrats, as well as Republicans and oil-industry lobbyists, say the package is too big, going far beyond just addressing safety lapses. “This bill is being sold as the response to the ongoing Gulf oil crisis,” said Doc Hastings, the ranking Republican on the House Natural Resources Committee. “Yet what has not been mentioned until right now is that it is stuffed with page after page of provisions that are totally unrelated to the spill.”

Portland officials have closed the book on Al Gore's criminal probe: The former vice president will not face prosecution on a 2006 sexual-assault allegation. Molly Hagerty, who claimed Gore abused her during a massage he paid for at the Hotel Lucia in Portland, Oregon, on October 24, 2006, did not apparently provide enough evidence. “After evaluating the materials submitted by PPB, I have concluded that I agree with the assessment that a sustainable criminal case does not exist,” Senior Deputy District Attorney Don Rees wrote in a memo Friday. “Ms. Hagerty's detailed statement… is insufficient to support a criminal charge given other contradictory evidence, conflicting witness statements, credibility issues, lack of forensic evidence, and denials by Mr. Gore.” Gore’s office in Nashville released the following statement in reply: “Mr. Gore unequivocally and emphatically denied this accusation when he first learned of its existence three years ago. He respects and appreciates the thorough and professional work of the Portland authorities and is pleased that this matter has now been resolved.”

You can put your pelican-scrubbing brush down: Robert Dudley, BP’s incoming CEO, said on Tuesday that it’s “not too soon for a scaleback” in the Gulf. He said BP is still fully committed to cleaning up the spill, but that “you probably don’t need to see people in hazmat suits on the beach.” BP capped the leaking well two weeks ago, and the relatively small amount of oil on the surface (scientists fear it may be underneath) means there’s not always enough work for the oil skimmers to do.

On Friday night’s CBS Evening News with Katie Couric, Rep. Charlie Rangel (D-NY) found a new critic: President Obama. Obama said he finds the ethics charges against Rangel “very troubling” and added that he hopes the 20-term lawmaker will step down from office with his dignity intact. “He’s somebody who’s at the end of his career,” said Obama. “I’m sure that what he wants is to be able to end his career with dignity. And my hope is that it happens.” While Obama praised Rangel for serving his Harlem district well, the president remains concerned about the alleged violations against him. And with good reason: Republicans plan to paint Rangel as representative of corrupt Washington, while some Democrats deny Rangel’s wrongdoing. “There’s no criminality here,” Rep. Edolphus Towns (D-NY) told reporters.

In the first interview either of Phoebe Prince’s parents have given since their daughter’s suicide last January, father Jeremy Prince tells Slate that he would like to forgive the Massachusetts high-school students currently facing criminal charges for cyberbullying his 15-year-old, calling her an “Irish slut,” among other things. The most serious charge against them: a civil-rights violation with bodily injury, which carries a 10-year maximum prison sentence. Others include criminal harassment and stalking. “If someone is punished disproportionately to what they’ve done, that would be wrong,” Prince said. More than anything, he said, he wants those involved to own up to what they did and apologize for hurting his daughter. “If they confessed to the court and said they were sorry, I’d appeal to the court for total leniency,” Prince said. “You can go two ways. You can look to the court for revenge or you can look for leniency. The latter path is mine.”

New Yorkers will have to come up with a new excuse for not answering their cellphones, because WiFi and mobile service is coming to New York subways—or at least to the platforms, mezzanines, and sections of the tunnels, Bloomberg reports. The contract to wire the subways was awarded to Transit Wireless in 2007, but they ran out of funding during the recession. It’s now been reanimated by Broadcast Australia, the mobile-infrastructure operator whose subsidiary oversaw the wireless retrofitting of Hong Kong’s subway system. Berlin and Tokyo also have wireless services in their subway systems. Transit Wireless will start installing antennas in six stations within the next two months, and according to their contract, they have four years to complete the remaining 271 stations.

The planned mosque and Islamic community center two blocks from where the World Trace Center attacks took place on September 11, 2001, continues to get flak from protesters—this time, the Anti-Defamation League, the nation’s top Jewish civil rights group. The project, the ADL says, is “counterproductive to the healing process.” The ADL’s main concerns are where the project’s funding is coming from and whether the organization behind the plan, the Cordoba Initiative, is associated with “groups whose ideologies stand in contradiction to our shared values.” The plan’s other opponents include Sarah Palin and former U.S. House Speaker Newt Gingrich. There are also supporters, though, like New York City’s Mayor Michael Bloomberg. “We believe it will be a place where the counter-momentum against extremism will begin,” Daisy Khan, wife of Cordoba’s director, told The New York Times. “We are committed to peace.” A city community board voted largely in favor of the project last spring.

American Apparel, to put it nicely, is screwed. The company has seen falling sales since February 2009, when records were first made available. Even its 2010 first quarter report looked bleak: There was a 10-percent decline in same-store sales and an operations loss of $17.6 million. The company is struggling to manage the pile of debt it took on during its greatest years of expansion, too. And—to top it all off—American Apparel’s auditing firm, Deloitte & Touche, quit on Thursday after it “identified material weaknesses in [American Apparel’s] internal control over financial reporting ... and advised that the Company has not maintained effective internal control over financial reporting.” The reason for all this is, as Jezebel writer Jenna Sauers puts it, is because American Apparel “expanded beyond the point of rationality or even sanity.” To the formerly booming and trendy T-shirt maker, we say good luck.

This has been a long-time coming: Hills star Heidi Montag has officially filed for divorce from Spencer Pratt. She cited irreconcilable differences. Pratt recently told People magazine that his wife “doesn’t want to be Spiedi anymore. She wants to be Heidi Montag: the sex symbol." He added: “There's no way my love for fame and her love for puppies will ever work out successfully…She just wants to hike and hang out and be calmer." At least the two former co-stars agree on one thing: her lawyer says they are “amicable with each other and over the possibility of finalizing their divorce.”

Today in despotism: North Korea subjected its national soccer team to a six-hour criticism before 400 people and has forced the team’s coach to become a builder after its dismal World Cup appearance, says The Telegraph. The coach, Kim Jong-hun, has been accused of “betraying” Kim Jong Il’s son, Kim Jong Un, and has also been kicked out of the Workers' Party of Korea. North Korea decided to conduct its first live sports broadcast ever after its team’s unexpectedly close loss to tournament favorite Brazil, 2-1. The team then lost the televised game to Portugal 7-0.

Paul Lee has replaced Stephen McPherson, who resigned from ABC earlier this week, as the new president of the ABC Entertainment Group, the company announced on Friday. Lee was previously president of ABC Family. This means Lee will manage the network’s primetime lineup, as well as its sister company, ABC Studios. “Paul was hired six years ago because of his great creative instincts and his ability to identify an audience and develop programming that resonates with them, and those same strengths are why he was tapped for this new responsibility,” Disney co-chair Anne Sweeney wrote in a statement. “Paul’s success at ABC Family is as amazing as it is indisputable, and I’m looking forward to his continued success on ABC.” Lee’s most indelible legacy at ABC Family: making it a top-five primetime cable network and helping attract young, predominantly female viewers to the network.

More classy news from the Jersey Shore: Nicole Polizzi, aka Snooki—star of MTV’s hit show Jersey Shore, which made its season-two premiere on Thursday night—was arrested for disorderly conduct in Seaside Heights on Friday. Earlier in the day, she’d been seen partying at the beach with a beer bong, which she apparently filled up with Coca-Cola. Afterward, she partook in body shots at a bar, according to TMZ. The exact details of Snooki’s conduct remain unclear.

Massive security forces will guard Chelsea Clinton’s wedding to Marc Mezvinsky this weekend. The FBI is rolling into Rhinebeck, N.Y. where state police are to patrol, the main road will close, and the FAA has designated a no-fly zone. Security was already tight Thursday amid preparations at the New York estate. Local businesses remain tight-lipped about their role in the "Wedding of the Year," which is sometimes upgraded to the "Wedding of the Century." Former President Bill Clinton and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton will naturally be in attendance and the stellar, 500-person guest list includes celebrities like Oprah Winfrey.

Facebook’s much-anticipated initial public offering is at least another year away. The company was believed to be preparing to go public sometime in 2011, but chief executive Mark Zuckerberg appears to have changed course and decided to take an extra year to grow the company. In that time, Facebook, which is currently valued at $24.9 billion and has 500 million users, is hoping to double its annual sales to around $1.4 billion. The extra year would also give Zuckerberg a chance to pick up the necessary skills to run a public company. “The burden of being public has never been greater,” said one technology analyst. “Zuckerberg doesn’t have to put his name at the bottom of four 10-Q statements every year and attest that everything in there is true or else he’s responsible. The minute it’s public, he does.”

Someone has finally agreed to buy Miramax, the piece of the magic kingdom that Disney has been trying to sell for months. Filmyard Holding, an investment group headed by the Los Angeles construction magnate Ron Tutor, will pay around $660 million for the studio and the 700 titles under its name, including Pulp Fiction and Shakespeare in Love. "Although we are very proud of Miramax's many accomplishments, our current strategy for Walt Disney Studios is to focus on the development of great motion pictures under the Disney, Pixar and Marvel brands," Disney CEO Bob Iger in a statement. It will be up to Tutor and his associated to now get Miramax moving again after Disney shut down its operations this year and closed its offices in New York and Los Angeles. Tutor said he plans to hire a seasoned Hollywood executive to run it.

Move over, Ivan Boesky. After a long investigation, the Security and Exchange Commission charged the politically active Samuel Wyly and Charles Wyly with secretly trading shares of public companies whose boards they sat on. According to the SEC, the Dallas-based brothers used a series of accounts and companies based in the Isle of Man and the Cayman Islands to secretly trade over $750 million in stock, netting themselves $550 million, including $32 million in one insider trading violation. The Wyly brothers have a history of exercising their hefty financial clout in politics, donating millions to various Republican causes over the years. The Wylys’ attorney and stockbroker are also under investigation.

Good move: TMZ says that American Idol has fired judge Kara DioGuardi and that the show will return to a three-judge format next season. TMZ says the panel will consist of Randy Jackson, who, at this point, is the only judge returning from last season, and newcomers Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez, whose deals are currently being negotiated. The only way DioGuardi will be back, TMZ says, is if J-Lo’s deal falls apart.

Rep. Charlie Rangel (D-NY) will be tried on 13 charges of ethics violations in what could turn out to be an unpleasant public spectacle for Democrats right in the middle of the election season. The midterm campaign was already expected to be a tough one for the party, with the public in a grumpy, anti-incumbent mood. Charges were announced as Rangel’s lawyers said they were still working on some kind of settlement. Rangel has denied all charges, which include that he improperly solicited donations to build a school named after him, didn’t pay taxes on his Dominican villa, didn’t fully disclose everything on his financial forms, and improperly accepted a rent-stabilized Manhattan apartment. He will now be given several weeks to review the charges, putting the trial date in September, campaign crunch time. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) said Rangel’s trial is an example of Democrats’ fulfilling their promise to clean up Washington—even when offenders are Democrats.

Toyota has issued yet another recall, this time of 373,000 Avalon sedans of the 2000-2004 model years, as well as 39,000 Lexus LX 470 SUVs of the 2003-2007 model years. On the Avalon, Toyota says that a component of the steering lock system can crack—and when the car is steered hard to the right, the piece could break, causing the steering wheel to lock and potentially cause a crash. Six incidents have been reported related to the glitch, though no one’s suffered injuries. The auto maker says it can replace the component within two hours for free at a dealer. As for the Lexus, a different, unrelated steering shaft problem needs to be fixed: the snap ring could disengage if the front wheels are hit really hard, as in a big pothole. That can sometimes cause the steering shaft to disengage eventually. In the past year, Toyota has recalled 9 million vehicles.

A cashier at a MetroPCS store in Florida fended off an armed robber last Friday … by preaching to him about Jesus. “Let me tell you about my God,” 20-year-old Nayara Goncalves says she told the robber. “Jesus has a plan for you.” They spoke for about five minutes before the thief left without taking any money. Police are still looking for the attempted robber. Maybe they should begin by talking to Goncalves: In the course of her sermon, she and the robber discovered that they attend the same church.

In the rest of the country, the Alaskan hockey mom everyone talks about is Sarah Palin. But in her home state, there is a more-popular Republican woman. And this one actually holds public office: Lisa Murkowski, the 53-year-old Republican Senator Alaskans like to know as just Lisa. The Murkowski name has long been embedded in Alaskan politics. When her father, Frank, left the Senate to become governor of the state, he appointed her to the open Senate seat. Now, she is running for re-election with opposition from the Palin-endorsed Joe Miller, while painting herself as the neighborhood girl from Ketchikan with ties to Juneau, Fairbanks, and Anchorage. Over the years, she said, she has gotten to know all the "people who are moving and shaking" in the state, "And I don't know Joe Miller, and I think that says something."

The Motion Picture Association of America has taken back its offer to Bob Kerrey. The former Senator and New School president's appointment as CEO was considered a done deal when it was announced two months ago, but negotiations broke down as he dithered over whether to take the gig. Then, Kerrey went on the Don Imus radio show and indiscreetly commented on the negotiations, raising eyebrows in the industry. He also appeared reluctant to move back to Washington. Eventually, studio heads began to doubt whether Kerrey was right for the job. He would have made $1.2 million a year working as the global public face (and chief lobbyist) for the MPAA.

The monsoon rains continued to wreak havoc on Pakistan Friday, sending the death toll to at least 313 as floods and landslides submerged entire villages. And that number is expected to rise as many people are still missing and Pakistani infrastructure is left in tatters. The northwest region was hit hardest with some of the worst flooding it has seen in more than 70 years. At least 291 people were killed there and some 400,000 more are believed to be stranded, while 5,000 homes now completely under mud and water. The United Nations said it is trying to coordinate a response to the disaster, but so many roads have become unusable that moving relief about the country is currently the biggest challenge.

Tony Hayward defiantly defends his record as CEO of BP during the massive oil spill, saying he did all he could after the Deepwater Horizon rig exploded, in an interview with The Wall Street Journal. Hayward says he led the company as it immediately took responsibility for the spill and spent billions of dollars to clean it up. "I became a villain for doing the right thing," Hayward says. "But I understand that people find it easier to vilify an individual more than a company." The former CEO said certain comments, like when he said he wanted to get his life back, were “wrong.” Hayward said he didn’t step down because “I love the company,” but he had to for its best interest. "In America, the road back will be long but I believe achievable when the whole truth of the accident finally emerges and the Gulf coast is restored,” he said. “BP can rebuild faster in America without Tony Hayward as its CEO."

Just hours after Fox announced that Ellen DeGeneres would be leaving American Idol, a successor has already been reported: Jennifer Lopez, according to Nikki Finke’s Deadline. Negotiations have apparently been going on for a month between Idol producers and Lopez’s manager Benny Medina, according to the site. Producers were also reportedly talking to Jessica Simpson about replacing the host-turned-judge—and according to Gossip Cop, Steven Tyler of Aerosmith was also in the running. DeGeneres’ departure comes a year before her contract is set to expire—the decision is thought to be mutual, according to Variety, which broke the story of her departure, as she was criticized frequently during the season. “It was a difficult decision to make, but my work schedule became more than I bargained for,” DeGeneres said. “I also realized this season that while I love discovering, supporting, and nurturing young talent, it was hard for me to judge people and sometimes hurt their feelings.” Fox also recently announced that Nigel Lythgoe, Idol's former showrunner, would return to the show next season.

Sarah Palin scoffed at President Obama’s appearance on The View Thursday, mocking him for having time to go on the daytime talk show but not to visit the U.S.-Mexico border. “President w/no time to visit porous US/Mexican border to offer help to those risking life to secure us,but lotso' time to chat on The View?” Palin tweeted. She followed up by tweeting, “I'm headed to border in near future... let's see how quickly his travel schedule will allow that border visit after all.”

Sixty-three U.S. troops have died so far this month in Afghanistan, making it the worst month for the U.S. in the nine years of the war. Three American service members were killed in two separate explosions, military officials said Friday. Military planners had warned of an increase in casualties when President Obama announced a surge in Afghanistan last December as part of a counterinsurgency strategy. June had been the worst month until July broke that grim record. The deaths of the two U.S. sailors who went missing a week ago in Logar, and whose bodies were recovered separately Sunday and Wednesday, remain a mystery, as the military is unsure why the two junior enlisted men were alone 60 miles from their base when they were captured.

We kind of think this is less “having a sex tape” and more “being a porn star”: Laurence Fishburne’s 19-year-old daughter Montana "Chippy D" has signed up to make a hardcore sex tape with Vivid Entertainment. "I've watched how successful Kim Kardashian became and I think a lot of it was due to the release of her sex tape,” she says. Kardashian claims that her sex tape was obtained illegally. TMZ says the film will come out in August.

Someone really needs to teach this kid how to use a condom: The National Enquirer is reporting that Levi Johnston may have knocked up his girlfriend Lanesia Garcia while he was separated from his current fiancé, Bristol Palin. Garcia is pregnant and says she thinks the child is Levi’s. RadarOnline.com reports, meanwhile, that Bristol is “heartbroken” and rethinking the engagement after learning the news. RadarOline.com adds that Levi thinks the child isn’t his, and that there are two other men who may be the father.

Disappointing news on the economic front: The pace of U.S. consumer spending slowed to 1.6 percent in the second quarter as Americans became reluctant to open their wallets. Meanwhile growth in Gross Domestic Product, the broadest measure of the economy, grew at an annual pace of 2.4 percent. The GDP figure was slightly weaker than expected and the slowest growth pace in nearly a year.

The reasoning behind Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer’s controversial immigration bill was simple: illegal immigrants make border states dangerous, so Arizona must crack down on illegal immigrants. The biggest problem, however, is that border states are some of the safest in the country. According to the FBI, the four lowest rates for violent crime in cities of at least 500,000 inhabitants are all in border states: San Diego, Phoenix, El Paso, and Austin. "The border is safer now than it's ever been," a U.S. Customs and Border Protection spokesman said. For instance, El Paso, which is directly across the border from one of the world’s most violent cities in Ciudad Juarez, had just one murder last year. Law enforcement officials explain that by saying that the bloody turf wars of Mexico’s cartels stay in Mexico. El Paso County’s sheriff said, "the Mexican cartels know that if they try to commit that kind of violence here, they'll get shut down."

The consequences of the WikiLeaks document dump are looking worse and worse: “We know how to punish them,” Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid tells Channel 4 News. “We are studying the report … We will investigate through our own secret service whether the people mentioned are really spies working for the U.S.” Defense Secretary Robert Gates has said the U.S. has a “moral responsibility” to help informants whose lives may be in danger.

People were blown into the street, some thrown under parked cars, when a Los Angeles building exploded Friday, killing at least two. The two-story building, which housed a welding operation, crumbled in the front from the natural-gas explosion. One hundred firefighters arrived on the scene and doused the fire in 25 minutes. Search and rescue teams are still looking for victims inside the structure. The people hurled into the street have been hospitalized.