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  1. FINAL RESTING PLACE Cemetery: Remove Spongebob Grave Kara Walker/AP

    1. Cemetery: Remove Spongebob Grave

    Cemetery officials in Cincinnati have ordered a seven-foot tall headstone of Spongebob in an Army uniform be removed, saying the tribute to the Iraq war veteran is inappropriate for a traditional resting place. Kimberly Walker, 28, was found strangled and beaten to death in a Colorado hotel room in February, and her boyfriend, an Army soldier stationed nearby, has been charged with her murder. Walker’s family says she was a devoted Spongebob fan, and they had planned to erect a matching headstone for her twin sister, Kara Walker (Kara’s would be wearing a Navy uniform, since she is an information technician in the Navy). Cemetery officials said they will meet with the Walker family on Tuesday to discuss other options.

    October 22, 2013 10:12 AM

  2. On Purpose Sad and Single, Man Cuts Off Penis Shutterstock

    2. Sad and Single, Man Cuts Off Penis

    That’s one way to handle the single life. A 26-year-old man in China, who reportedly worked long hours and figured he would never get a girlfriend, literally chopped off his own penis. Naturally, the man instantly regretted his decision and headed straight to the hospital—on a bicycleto receive immediate attention. The doctors, who were unsurprisingly shocked that The man did this voluntarily, told him to retrieve the severed penis that they could attempt to reattach the missing (shudder) piece. Unfortunately, the man had lost too much blood by the time he returned so it could not be saved. Let this be a lesson.

    November 2, 2013 12:00 AM

  3. ‘Act of Kindness’ ‘Duck Dynasty’ Scarecrow Randomly Appears AETV

    3. ‘Duck Dynasty’ Scarecrow Randomly Appears

    After a scarecrow modeled after Uncle Si from TV’s Duck Dynasty went missing in the town of Ball Ground, Georgia, last week, a new version was mysteriously returned to its post—and no one is sure how or who put it back there. A sign that reads “I’m back, Jack!” is now situated next to the resurrected scarecrow. The original one—which took four people to build—was burned to ashes by a teen. It’s still unclear whether it was that teen who replaced the scarecrow. “(It was) a random act of kindness. It could be any number of things,” the city clerk said. 

    October 26, 2013 12:00 AM

  4. Supernatural Country Believes in Magical Elves Bob Strong/Reuters

    4. Country Believes in Magical Elves

    Like, the fudge cookie-making kind? People of Iceland are protesting the construction of a new road development that would disrupt the countryside because it would displace supernatural forces, including an “elf garden.” A fortune teller of sorts believes that the field is inhabited by elves, huldufolk (hidden people), and dwarves. The new road would get in the way of “a very important elf church,” the seer said. This comes as no surprise to the Icelandic government—a chief spokesman told The Atlantic: “We value the heritage of our ancestors and if oral tradition passed on from one generation to the other tells us that a certain location is cursed, or that supernatural beings inhabit a certain rock, then this must be considered a cultural treasure.”

    November 2, 2013 12:00 AM

  5. DOPPELGANGER Meet the Dog That Looks Like Putin Getty, obozrevatel.com

    5. Meet the Dog That Looks Like Putin

    You can see it in the eyes. A dog that could be a mix between a Staffordshire terrier and a German shepherd was found in the Ukraine. After being reported to the website Obozrevatel.com, many have been commenting about how the pup resembles Russia's President Vladimir Putin. Irish comic presenter Graham Norton took to Twitter: "Geeeeeenius! I wonder if it bites the gays?" Another Twitter user for the win: "Vladimir Poochin."

    September 20, 2013 12:00 AM

  6. BRB Prisoner Escapes, Heads to Dentist Getty

    6. Prisoner Escapes, Heads to Dentist

    A prisoner in Sweden with a one-month sentence, broke out of the facility after having overwhelming tooth pain. The man claimed he wasn’t being treated by medical staff behind bars so he took matters into his own hands. The 51-year-old prisoner headed to the dentist to have his tooth pulled out after busting out. Surprisingly, following the procedure, the man called the police to be driven back to the prison, where he was given a warning and an additional day on his sentence as punishment.

    December 7, 2013 12:00 AM

  7. MMM SALTY Man Swallowed Human Toe in Bar A Carmichael/Getty

    7. Man Swallowed Human Toe in Bar

    Canada needs to get some new traditions. An American man was fined $500 for intentionally swallowing a very special toe in a Yukon bar. Since 1972, roughly 60,000 people have tried the Sourtoe Cocktail—a "famous Dawson City tradition" that involves drinking a shot of Yukon Gold whiskey with an old, shriveled toe inside. In order to prevent theft or swallowing—you're only supposed to touch the toe with your lips—the bar instituted a $500 fine, but have since raised it to $2,500. According to the bar's "toe captain," this is the first time the toe has been gulped down purposefully.

    August 31, 2013 12:00 AM

  8. JERK Sexist Gorilla Sent to Therapy Oli Scarff/Getty

    8. Sexist Gorilla Sent to Therapy

    He's an animal! Patrick, a 430-pound gorilla at the Dallas Zoo, is being transferred to a therapist facility after he bit one female gorilla and gave shade to another. Patrick, who has been known to treat the female gorillas either with aggression or indifference, will be moving to the Riverbanks Zoo and Gardens Columbia in South Carolina for more solitary confinement. "It's not like we haven't tried, he's been here for 18 years," spokeswoman for the Dallas Zoo Laurie Holloway said. 

    September 28, 2013 12:00 AM

  9. YOLO Drunk Teen Wakes Up in New Country Fred Dufour/Getty

    9. Drunk Teen Wakes Up in New Country

    What better time to travel abroad than the present? That must have been what teenager Luke Harding was thinking when instead of taking a cab home at the end of a drunken night took it straight to the airport. Harding, who had started his night off in England, awoke the following morning at Charles De Gaulle airport in Paris. Harding had used his passport when he went to a Manchester club, which explains how he was able to make it through security when he got to the airport. He tweeted when he (potentially) got sober: “Don’t remember the flight. it’s f***ing expensive here though. Mum thinks I’m a pillock. Walked past the Eiffel Tower 3 times! Not a club where I am.”

    November 22, 2013 11:00 PM

  10. Awkward Man Faces Goat He Had Sex With YouTube

    10. Man Faces Goat He Had Sex With

    You can’t escape your exes. The man who was convicted of sexual abuse for molesting his neighbor’s goat behind a bush came face to face with the animal in court. The 28-year-old man from Kenya, who was sentenced to ten years in prison last Friday, pleaded guilty before receiving this court order. According to the goat’s owner, the animal was tied to a bush when the man approached it and started doing what a vet confirmed as rape.

    December 6, 2013 3:13 PM