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  1. he said, she said Woody Allen: I Didn’t Molest Dylan Vincent Kessler/Reuters

    1. Woody Allen: I Didn’t Molest Dylan

    In an op-ed for The New York Times, Woody Allen responded to allegations that, in 1992, he sexually molested his 7-year-old adopted daughter Dylan. Unsurprisingly, Allen maintains that the allegations are false and the result of his ex-girlfriend Mia Farrow's vindictive influence after Allen began dating another of her adopted daughters, Soon-Yi Previn. He uses several anecdotes to call into question Mia's integrity as a person, including the question of who Ronan Farrow's real father is. "Even if he is not Frank [Sinatra’s], the possibility she raises that he could be indicates she was secretly intimate with him during our years," writes Allen. "Not to mention all the money I paid for child support. Was I supporting Frank’s son? Again, I want to call attention to the integrity and honesty of a person who conducts her life like that." Allen adds that he loved Dylan and that he and Soon-Yi "are both hoping that one day she will understand who has really made her a victim and reconnect with us, as [her brother] Moses has, in a loving, productive way."

    February 7, 2014 8:42 PM

  2. no trespassing White House Locked Down Larry Downing/Reuters

    2. White House Locked Down

    The White House was placed on lockdown Friday afternoon after a person attempted to climb the outer fence with two "suspicious" bags, according to the Secret Service. The climber was taken into custody and Washington, D.C.'s bomb squad was called to screen the bags. If the suspect was hoping for a meet with President Obama, he was in for disappointment anyway—the president is in Michigan for the signing of the new Farm Bill.

    February 7, 2014 3:25 PM

  3. ALARMING Flight Grounded By Hijack Attempt Pascal Pavani/AFP/Getty

    3. Flight Grounded By Hijack Attempt

    An F-16 military jet forced an airliner flying from Ukraine to Turkey to ground on Friday after a hijacking attempt. According to reports, a Ukrainian passenger demanded the destination be switched to Sochi, and claimed there was a bomb on board. The pilot was able to send an alert signal, which caused authorities to scramble the military jet. The plane had 110 passengers. Turkish authorities are now sweeping the plane and passengers for explosives. 

    February 7, 2014 12:27 PM

  4. off the base Alex Rodriguez Drops Lawsuits Elsa / Getty Images

    4. Alex Rodriguez Drops Lawsuits

    The A-Rod battle has been surrendered. Alex Rodriguez dropped his lawsuits against Major League Baseball, the Major League Baseball Players Association, and Commissioner Bud Selig on Friday, agreeing to take a 162-game suspension for this year's season. The Yankee third baseman sued after his suspension was reduced from 211 to one full season due to "use and possession" of testosterone and other banned substances. "We believe that Mr. Rodriguez’s actions show his desire to return the focus to the play of our great game on the field and to all of the positive attributes and actions of his fellow major league players," MLB said in a statement. "We share that desire.”

    February 7, 2014 5:57 PM

  5. IMPOTENT NSA Overwhelmed by Cell Phone Use Zoran Milich/Reuters

    5. NSA Overwhelmed by Cell Phone Use

    Despite a reputation for omnipotence and omniscience, the NSA is collecting less than 30 percent of all U.S. call records thanks to the surge in cell phone usage. According to officials, back in 2006, the agency was able to collect nearly all records about Americans' phone calls under a classified program. Now, as more and more people migrate away from landlines, the NSA finds itself faced with challenges in not only acquiring the data from wireless companies, but also having databases capable of handling the large amounts of records. While some would argue the less-than-30-percent number would signify a lack of value to the data collection, NSA Deputy Director Rick Ledgett defended the agency, arguing, "It's better than zero."

    February 7, 2014 11:19 AM

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  7. SUCH A TEASE Boehner: Immigration Reform Dead Larry Downing/Reuters

    6. Boehner: Immigration Reform Dead

    After dangling a statement of principles for immigration reform last week, House Speaker John Boehner said Thursday that it is unlikely to pass in 2014. “The American people, including many of my members, don’t trust that the reform that we’re talking about will be implemented as it was intended to be,” Boehner said, in reference to GOP criticisms of the president's use of executive orders. In the days since Boehner first mentioned the possibility for reform, Tea Partiers have shifted their focus from spending to "amnesty" for illegal immigrants. One House Republican said the push by Boehner should cost him his gavel.

    February 7, 2014 6:54 AM

  8. UH OH Biden Dangles 2016 Run Saul Loeb/AFP/Getty

    7. Biden Dangles 2016 Run

    Vice President Joe Biden ain't drinking the Hillary Clinton 2016 Kool-Aid. When asked by CNN about a potential 2016 candidacy, Biden responded, “There’s no obvious reason for me why I think I should not run.” He says he will decide by the summer of 2015 whether or not to pursue the presidency again, saying he'll judge based off of who is "the best qualified person." “That doesn’t mean I’m the only guy that can do it,” he said. “But if no one else, I think, can, and I think I can, then I’d run.”

    February 7, 2014 9:44 AM

  9. MONSTERS Taliban Captures NATO Dog

    8. Taliban Captures NATO Dog

    In a video posted to a Twitter account used to disseminate Taliban propaganda, heavily armed fighters cheer their newest prisoner of war—a Belgian Malinois. In the video, one fighter claims, “Allah gave victory to the mujahideen! Down with them, down with their spies!” A spokesman for the coalition in Afghanistan confirmed on Thursday that a military dog attached to a British special forces unit was lost during an operation in December. A Taliban spokesman told the Washington Post that “the dog was of high significance to the Americans" and carries the rank of colonel. Belgian Malinois dogs are chosen for their agility and endurance, and are trained to parachute and rappel with handlers.

    February 7, 2014 7:03 AM

  10. WHEW! 'Pineapple Express' to Save NorCal © Robert Galbraith / Reuters

    9. 'Pineapple Express' to Save NorCal

    While possibly thwarting travel plans and bringing weekend flooding, there will likely be a big sigh of relief in response to the expected storm front hitting dried-out Northern California this weekend. 2013 was the driest calendar year on record for the area, which was then followed by the driest January ever. Now, the Bay Area is expecting a quick turnaround with something called an "Atmospheric River" or "Pineapple Express" which will bring a burst of three to seven inches of rain.

    February 7, 2014 9:34 AM

  11. dangerous game Cal Football Player Dies After Run Collegiate Images/Getty

    10. Cal Football Player Dies After Run

    During a Friday morning team conditioning workout, a 21-year-old UC Berkeley football player collapsed and died. Ted Agu played backup defensive end for the Cal team, and earned Pac-12 All-Academic second-team honors last semester. According to a teammate, Agu passed during a run and then died at a local hospital.  “This is a very difficult time for our football family,” said head coach Sonny Dykes.

    February 7, 2014 3:11 PM

  12. FROWNY FACE Jobs Numbers Disappoint Joe Raedle/Getty

    11. Jobs Numbers Disappoint

    While the unemployment rate dropped from 6.7 percent to 6.6 percent, the U.S. economy added a disappointing 113,000 jobs in January. The number was far below economists' expectations of 180,000 jobs. It appears that the weak numbers for hiring in December have carried over into 2014, confirming experts' fears over a loss of energy in the economy.

    February 7, 2014 8:51 AM

  13. FASHION FOOD FIGHT Anna Wintour Gets New Challenger

    12. Anna Wintour Gets New Challenger

    Just in time for the catfight that is fashion week, Internet-wonder and high-end fashion retailer Net-a-Porter is launching its own magazine, Porter, to rival Vogue. The magazine, which launched Thursday, has 284 pages in its first edition, which will be available in 220 cities and 60 countries. The retailer, which also owns popular menswear destination Mr. Porter, does not see itself solely as a clothing company, as founder Natalie Massenet says the company is "also a media group, and we love print." 

    February 7, 2014 12:09 PM

  14. SNOBS Brit Museum Buys First U.S. Art National Gallery, London

    13. Brit Museum Buys First U.S. Art

    While American fast-food chains may be good enough to dot their cities, apparently Yankee art was never good enough to fill their museums. The National Gallery in London has made its first ever purchase of an American painting, a 1912 George Bellows titled “Men of the Docks.” In a back-handed compliment sure to leave a sting stateside, Dr. Nicholas Penny, the director of the National Gallery said, "I'm a great fan of American painting, but great examples are hard to come by." The National Gallery paid $25.5 million for the piece. Its previous owner was Randolph College in Virginia.

    February 7, 2014 7:09 AM

  15. TOUGH GUY UFC Fighter Jailed After Standoff Jason Silva/USA Today Sports, via Reuters

    14. UFC Fighter Jailed After Standoff

    Police have arrested UFC fighter Thiago Silva after he allegedly threatened people inside a school while armed and then proceeded to barricade himself inside his house in Oakland Park, Florida. Silva is being charges with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon and resisting arrest without violence. On his way into jail, Silva flipped the bird to press standing outside.

    February 7, 2014 11:04 AM

  16. MEDICAL SCHOOL? TV's ‘House’ Diagnoses Patient Charley Gallay/Getty

    15. TV's ‘House’ Diagnoses Patient

    Hopeful this doctor's bedside manner was more manageable. Dr. Juergen Schaefer was faced with a tough case. For months doctors were baffled by a 55-year-old German man suffering from severe heart failure who presented symptoms including fever, blindness, deafness, and enlarged lymph nodes. Luckily for the man, Schaefer is a fan of the medical drama House. “After five minutes, I knew what was wrong,’’ said Schaefer, as his symptoms matched a patient in an episode where cobalt poisoning was the cause. It turned out that fragments from a ceramic hip replacement were leaking cobalt and chromium into his bloodstream.

    February 7, 2014 7:17 AM

  17. PETULANT Russia: Butt Out of Ukraine David Mdzinarishvili/Reuters

    16. Russia: Butt Out of Ukraine

    Apparently unaware of something called the Olympic spirit, Russia has escalated tensions with the U.S. as one Kremlin official accused Washington of "crudely interfering" in Ukraine. Meanwhile the Obama administration believes Russia was behind leaking an intercepted private conversation between two American diplomats in which one said: "fuck the E.U." As violence has escalated in Ukraine, American officials have tried to broker a settlement, something Russians (who still view Ukraine as their satellite state) are now trying to disrupt.

    What does the world think of the turmoil in Ukraine?

    February 7, 2014 6:56 AM

  18. riot no longer Pussy Riot Boots Two Members Neilson Barnard/Getty

    17. Pussy Riot Boots Two Members

    Thanks for enduring two years in Russia prison, but you're out of the band. A few hours after Nadya Tolokonnikova and Masha Alyokhina—two members of feminist activist group Pussy Riot—performed at Amnesty International's concert in Brooklyn, the band announced they had been kicked out. The other members wrote on Pussy Riot's blog that charging for tickets to the show "is highly contradictory to the principles of Pussy Riot," and "Masha and Nadia are out of the group." The two, along with another bandmate, were recently released from prison after being found guilty of hooliganism after hosting a "punk prayer" in February 2012. 

    February 6, 2014 5:46 PM

  19. worth it? Biggest Inside Trader Convicted Eduardo Munoz/Reuters

    18. Biggest Inside Trader Convicted

    Another SAC Capital employee was convicted on Thursday for his role in what prosecutors claim to be the most lucrative insider trading scheme in American history. Mathew Martoma was a portfolio manager at Steven Cohen's $14 billion hedge fund, which used confidential information about investments to profit and avoid $275 million in losses. Martoma is the eighth employee to be found guilty. He was charged with conspiracy and securities fraud, and faces a maximum of 45 years in prison. Last year, SAC Capital agreed to pay $1.8 billion in settlements.

    February 6, 2014 8:16 PM

  20. GRUMPY Biden: LaGuardia Is ‘Third World’ Don Emmert, AFP / Getty Images

    19. Biden: LaGuardia Is ‘Third World’

    Sometime tell an aide to stop booking Joe Biden's flights through LaGuardia. The vice president bashed the New York City airport during an Amtrak unveiling event in Philadelphia, saying visitors arrive and think, "I must be in some third world country." He compared the airport to Hong Kong's, which he called "a modern airport" that looks like it belongs in America. "No, I'm not joking!" Biden said. "Why did we lead the world economically for so long? We had the most modern infrastructure in the world."

    February 6, 2014 8:45 PM

  21. LIVE LONG AND PROSPER Leonard Nimoy Reveals Lung Disease Fred Prouser/Reuters

    20. Leonard Nimoy Reveals Lung Disease

    After photos of Star Trek star Leonard Nimoy in a wheelchair with an oxygen mask surfaced on the web, the actor took to Twitter to explain that he has chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD). Spock wrote: "I quit smoking 30 yrs ago. Not soon enough. I have COPD. Grandpa says, quit now!!" He continued to address the topic of smoking, saying, "Smokers, please understand. If you quit after you're diagnosed with lung damage it's too late. Grandpa says learn my lesson. Quit now." COPD is an umbrella term that covers lung diseases like emphysema, chronic bronchitis, asthma, and bronchiectasis.

    February 7, 2014 7:14 AM

  22. HOBBITS

    21. 800,000-Year-Old Footprints Found

    Scientists in England have found human footprints that are at least 800,000 years old, the earliest evidence of human life outside of Africa. The team discovered the footprints in estuary mud in Happisburgh, on England's east coast. The prints are "a tangible link to our earliest human relatives," says British Museum scientist Nick Ashton. The scientists believe the footprints may be related to Homo antecessor, a.k.a. "pioneer man," which died out 800,000 years ago.

    February 7, 2014 7:16 AM