From some fun audience banter to a wacky Pharrell number featuring a shimmying Meryl Streep and a rug-cutting Lupita Nyong’o, the 2014 Academy Awards was—gasp!—pretty damn fun.
Ladies and gentlemen: I’m shocked—shocked!—to inform you that the ’14 Oscars were actually quite good. In fact, they were better than good. They were excellent, and the best they’ve been in a decade, since the last time (a chipper) Billy Crystal served as master of ceremonies.
Now, I hated the 2013 Oscars.
No matter what critics say about it or how many viewers watched it, Ellen DeGeneres's Oscar hosting stint is already one for the record books.
In a positively inspired bit, the Oscar host took what was instantly the best selfie of all time (or at least the most star-studded one). Less than 40 minutes later, the photo broke the record for the most retweeted selfie ever.
Finally! The genius episode ‘Still’ focuses on a teenage girl and a flawed drunk to remind us that this show isn’t about zombies—it’s about humans.
When the credits roll after “Still,” there are going to be a few whiners. There will be people who complain that “nothing happened” or that, without Abraham, Rick, or Michonne, it was a boring episode. They’ll be wrong.
It was a perfect episode.
Who is the Yellow King? What is Carcosa? We read the tea leaves from Sunday’s penultimate episode—and predict how HBO’s masterful crime drama will conclude. Spoiler alert!
Another Sunday, another spectacular episode of True Detective.
If you haven’t seen HBO’s deep, dark crime drama yet—it stars Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson as a pair of Louisiana detectives investigating a disturbing ritualistic murder over the course of 17 years—stop now. This story will consist of nothing but spoilers.
She did it again, folks.
Oh, J. Law.
America's Sweetheart, Jennifer Lawrence, was gliding down the Oscars red carpet Sunday evening in a stunning gown designed by Christian Dior. She paused to wave to her fans and then... it happened again. The 23-year-old actress took another tumble heard 'round the world, collapsing in a heap on the red carpet, before recovering valiantly. Yet another chapter in the "J. Law's Clumsiness is So Endearing" saga. And boy, she really is.
A night of cups of wine, cheese on paper plates, and the only awards show to honor Will and Jaden Smith for ‘After Earth.’
While the entertainment industry gears up for its most important night, in a nondescript office building on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, a whole different kind of celebration is about to take place. This one features no red carpet, no paparazzi and, only in the rarest of circumstances, a celebrity. The Golden Raspberry Awards—the Razzies—honors the worst in film with the best (and weirdest) show a few dollars can afford. And I'm lucky enough to be there.
Will Smith and his son Jaden Smith (Carlo Allegri/Reuters)
After dodging the few remaining raindrops from the torrential downpours that have paralyzed Los Angeles, I reach my destination at the corner of Hollywood and La Brea, just blocks from the Dolby Theatre. Knowing how legendary the Razzies are, I'm taken aback when the only indication of any sort of activity, much less an award show, is a photocopied sheet of paper with a giant raspberry taped to the door. I reach the two security guards working the front desk and am able to disrupt them just long enough to inquire where the "ceremony" (yes, I used air quotes) is.
The pre-show red carpet fandango on E! and ABC had everything the Oscar watcher could wish for: bad dresses to bitch about, presenters mouthing a stream of relentless vapidity, and Liza Minnelli stalking everything like a cobalt blue shark
It is just after 8pm. I do not know what will happen next, but I do know Liza Minnelli is at the Oscars ceremony doing something in cobalt blue, an equally livid streak in her hair, making my heart race. And she's walking, head bobbing, with an odd kinetic purpose, behind other people's camera shots. Is anyone with Liza? Accompanying her? Her half-sister Lorna Luft is, but is anyone making sure Liza's not near open flame or an exposed electronic cable? Really, I just want the evening to go off without a hitch.
I mean, don't let her near Jennifer Lawrence. The poor woman's already gone down once tonight, apparently sabotaged by one of the traffic cones that had turned up on the red carpet in perhaps a surrealist art exercise. If you see Minnelli, rugby-tackle Ms. New York, New York. For all our sakes.
There she was, behind Ryan Seacrest on the E! pre-Oscars red carpet show, where this year, Ryan did not get doused with ash, which was fortunate as he was in a white Christopher Bailey tux. Ryan's job is thankless, although he is thanked a lot by others. The celebrities tell him how great he is at his job. And although he smiles grittily through it, you also know he feels he is a Hollywood player himself, dammit, and here he is asking about dress labels and showering people with the same empty compliments and superlatives. He's really thinking about how he might wind up the latest series of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Why doesn't anyone show him some respect? This year, he got zero out of anyone. Not even when he asked Benedict Cumberbatch what the atmosphere was like on the 12 Years a Slave set. (Oh party central, Ryan, it was just a laugh a minute, especially the hour-long lashing scene.)
From Bob Hope to Whoopi Goldberg and Neil Patrick Harris, relive six decades of Academy Award openers.
What’s an awards ceremony for the year’s best films and performances without an opening to start things off right? The Academy has a long history of making some very interesting first impressions.
The openings have gone from simplistic to extravagant, featuring funny monologues, dance numbers, and lots of celebrities. Who can forget James Franco dressing up as Marilyn Monroe in 2011, or Billy Crystal opening as Hannibal Lecter in 1992? With Ellen DeGeneres hosting this year, it’s sure to be an interesting one (finally cool musical numbers!).
There’s one real reason we all tune in to the Oscars each year: to watch A-list celebrities cry. Who’s delivered the best speeches ever? Here’s our list.
Tom Hanks - 1993
“The streets of heaven are too crowded with angels.” BRB I’M WEEPING FOREVER. Everything about Tom Hanks’s Oscar acceptance speech for his performance in Philadelphia is perfect, except that he calls Rita Wilson his “lover.” Twice.
Who is LittleRedBunny? That’s what the adult industry is asking after a red-haired girl with a French accent became the hottest cam girl on the Internet.
Ophelia hoists up two bags of toys at the foot of the bed, explaining each is used for a different entrance. “It isn’t always sexual,” she tells me in her French accent on Skype. “A lot of time is sensuous. A lot is talking. Each person is different. I am really interested to know each one.” Her cam is set up to frame her bed with a background decorated to match her red hair. Decked in lacy lingerie her public tease dancing emphasizes her, um, flexibility.
Most nights, all night, you can go online and join 2,000 to 3,000 others watching this striking redhead known as LittleRedBunny burlesque dance to vintage music.
A self-proclaimed ‘Barbie’ believes you don’t need food or water to live. Brains either, it would seem.
The Ukrainians sure have had a rough February. First their eye-poppingly corrupt president, Viktor Yanukovych, goes missing, then armed soldiers appear in the Crimea airport, then their president reappears in Russia acting like nothing happened, and then "Barbie" automaton Valeria Lukyanova, a Ukrainian lass (actually she was born in Moldava but never mind), announces that she was a breatharian. That’s right. Barbie believes you can live without food and water—and exist on air alone.
While you let that one sink in, let’s pause for a moment to measure the sum of the Nouveau Barbie. Ms. Lukyanova already has done a mighty fine job working the Internets to pump up a uniquely modern type of fame, positioning herself in the weird but ever-expanding mid-zone between self-promotion and self-parody, working the tension of ‘is she kidding or not?’ as expertly as Andy Kaufman.
When they’re not showing off their ridiculous white casts or Americanized religious themes, Jesus movies are overwhelmed by their self-importance. Maybe it’s time to stop making them.
I never want to see Jesus again.
Not in a movie, at least. Not after sitting through two hours and 18 minutes of Son of God, the latest tragedy about the life of Jesus and the acting career of Roma Downey, the onetime Touched By An Angel star who, in addition to playing Mary, produced the film with her husband, Mark Burnett.
Having watched some of History Channel’s The Bible, the 10-hour mini series from which most of Son of God was pieced together, I already knew Jesus Starring Roma Downey wasn’t going to be great. (Nothing starring Roma Downey has ever been great.) But still, I went to the theater praying for the best, hoping Jesus might not be terrible. But alas, God’s only son was terrible; the story, the dialogue, the acting, the non-miraculous special effects—all pretty terrible. Sometimes it was SyFy Channel-terrible. Son of God is so awful that it borders on godless—not sinful or heretical, just lacking true Spirit.
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