The scene in an English pub on Thursday:

Football Fan No. 1: “Hey, did you hear David Beckham’s retiring from professional football?”

The CW took the wraps off of its 2013-14 primetime schedule on Thursday morning, marking the final day of the broadcast network upfronts.

Among the changes afoot at the nearly seven-year old network: Hart of Dixie and Beauty and the Beast are moving to Mondays, Supernatural moves to Tuesdays, and The Carrie Diaries gets pushed to Fridays at 8 p.m. Nikita, which will have its final season of a six episodes, will be held until midseason. The network ordered five new dramas for next season, which will be scattered throughout Tuesdays (The Vampire Diaries spin-off The Originals), Wednesdays (The Tomorrow People), and Thursdays (period drama Reign) when The CW begins its fall season in October. Two additional dramas—Star-Crossed and The 100—will be held until midseason along with newly ordered reality show Famous in 12; their timeslots are still to be determined.

There was a media firestorm when Arrested Development’s Jason Bateman unwittingly tweeted a photo of his first day back on set for the show last August, revealing two-thirds of Comedy Central’s Workaholics co-stars and co-creators—Adam DeVine (Adam DeKamp) and Anders Holm (Anders “Ders” Holmvik)— in the background. Fans have been salivating for details on the popular show’s return to Netflix on May 26.

“Jason Bateman didn’t know we were on a TV show,” DeVine said in an interview with The Daily Beast. “He had no idea about Workaholics until then, and then he was like, ‘I guess these guys are really on a show,’ which is really cool. I’m such a huge Arrested Development fan.”

Six seasons in, The Big Bang Theory is more popular than ever, and better than ever. Which is not to say it’s a great show, as much as I always root for popularity and greatness to overlap. (If I didn’t, I’d be reviewing poetry full-time.) What BBT has going for it this season is its clear, crisp communication to its audience that it completely understands the personality and function of every member of its growing cast, no small achievement for a series that started out as a simple story pitch: two nerds (Jim Parsons and Johnny Galecki) try to interact with the hot girl (Kaley Cuoco) across the hall.

The series has sextupled-down on that premise, first by making egghead pals Howard (Simon Helberg) and Raj (Kunal Nayyar) co-stars, and then giving both plus Sheldon brainy love interests (played, respectively, by Melissa Rauch, Kate Micucci, and Mayim Bialik). And did this without reducing the screen time of the show’s only nonintellectual, Cuoco’s Penny, while filling in her characterization well beyond “hot girl” to interestingly tough-minded, probably-from-an-abusive-family realist.

Perched atop a mountain of wavy, pulled-back hair is a mangled ball of manliness, a holdover from the days of the samurai. Joakim Noah, the most fashionable Chicago Bull, has a top bun.

In the annals of hair, the top bun renaissance will be marked by the style’s escape from the shackles of gender and Brooklyn’s “hipster” L train. Wearing top buns (also known as the top knot or, according to The New York Times, the man bun), men are straddling both fashion and practicality. And looking sexy while doing so.

The bun’s unisex construction pushes rogue strands of hair away from the face and, in only a few minutes, presents a clean, polished look. Stylist Brandon Williams, who works with the Memphis Grizzlies’ Mike Conley, tells me that in a generation of NBA players who aspire to classy GQ fashion—Steve Nash shed his Katie Couric tresses for a Mad Men cut, Kevin Durant opts for thick-rimmed glasses—Noah is a rebel.

Is your idea of a good date dinner, a movie, and a passionate debate about whether Gul Dukat, even though he hurt a lot of Bajorans while commanding Terok Nor, is good or evil? Well, you’re in luck.

“Set phasers to stunning and if that doesn’t work set them to stun!” encourages StarTrekDating.com, one of a number of dating websites that have beamed online in recent years to help Star Trek and sci-fi enthusiasts find love. “If you’re a sci-fi fan and want to meet your Borg Queen or Captain Kirk, try it now!”