While the ratings increased three percent to 40.3 million—including an 11 percent uptick in the coveted 18-49 demo—for the telecast of the 85^th annual Academy Awards, a pair of Oscar nominated actresses with deep Hollywood ties are none too thrilled with Seth MacFarlane’s performance as host.

Two-time Oscar winner Jane Fonda (Klute, Coming Home), the daughter of Oscar winner Henry Fonda, fired the opening salvo, penning a recap of her Oscar night for her official website. After praising the song-and-dance skills of Charlize Theron, Channing Tatum, and Catherine Zeta-Jones, as well as Shirley Bassey’s towering rendition of “Goldfinger,” she launched into a harsh critique of MacFarlane—in particular the “We Saw Your Boobs” song he performed, which name-checked past Oscar nominees’ topless turns (including Jodie Foster’s during a gang-rape scene in The Accused), as well as a pretty tasteless jab he took at 9-year-old nominee Quvenzhané Wallis (Beasts of the Southern Wild), joking, ““it’ll be 16 years before she’s too old" for George Clooney.

“What I really didn’t like was the song and dance number about seeing actresses boobs,” wrote Fonda. “I agree with someone who said, if they want to stoop to that, why not list all the penises we’ve seen? Better yet, remember that this is a telecast seen around the world watched by families with their children and to many this is neither appropriate or funny. I also didn’t like the remark made about Quvenzhane and Clooney, or the stuff out of Ted’s mouth and all the comments about what women do to get thin for their dresses. Waaaay too much stuff about women and bodies, as though that’s what defines us.”

Callers to The Onion’s office in Chicago are greeted with the usual automated rundown—Press 1 for an automated phone directory, 5 for accounts payable, 7 for technical problems, etc.—except that at the end of the message, the calm, deadpan voice on the answering service says, “For content concerns, please refer to the First Amendment of the United States Constitution. For content correction, please note that we do not make mistakes.”

Callers are then given an email address to contact “if you feel like ranting.”

But today the Onion acknowledged that, contra company policy, they did make a mistake, a big one, when the satirical news weekly called Quvenzhané Wallis, the 9-year-old star of the movie Beasts of the Southern Wild a “cunt” in a tweet.

Best Actress Oscar nominee Quvenzhané Wallis has been called a lot of things, most of them complimentary. Among them: “a small force of nature,” “special,” and “extraordinary.” Now, thanks to The Onion’s Twitter feed, she can add another word she probably shouldn’t hear for another 15 years.  

The normally funny satirical website posted a now-deleted Tweet that called Wallis a c--t. “Everyone else seems afraid to say it, but that Quvenzhané Wallis is kind of a c--t, right? #Oscars2013”

Um, what? Wallis is so young and innocent she carried a puppy purse to the Oscars.

Finally … an Oscars the guys can enjoy!

That’s how ABC billed the 85th annual Academy Awards ceremony, which aired on the network at 8:30 p.m. ET Sunday night.

Perhaps they meant 12-year-old boys?

Oscar’s Youngest Star Charms the Red Carpet

One of the most poignant scenes in 5 Broken Cameras, the documentary I co-directed with Emad Burnat, is when Emad films his four children crossing the separation barrier built in the Palestinian village of Bil’in in the West Bank. In this scene, Emad concentrates on filming the barrier itself as his children enter the frame. His youngest son, Gibreel, then age 2, utters his first on-screen words: “wall,” “army,” and “rubber bullet.” Emad creates a portrait of the occupation, and his family becomes a pretext for this political reality.

Long before Gibreel learns to define himself as a child, he sees himself as a person in a relationship to the political elements around him. And it is not until he’s 6, near the end of the film, that he defines himself as “Gibreel,” by writing his own name on the barrier. In other words, his personal identity only emerges after his connection to the political world has been defined—and in this way, political language dominates his inner voice.

My intention during the making of 5 Broken Cameras was to tease out Emad’s inner voice from the layers of political language obfuscating it. This film deals with political subjects in a politicized reality, but its language doesn’t come from the political world. It’s a language that borders on the spiritual world and that of the soul. For years political discourse has been robbing us of opportunities to have complex debates about our lives and reducing our ability to bring invention and creativity to our actions in the world.

I entered into this partnership with Emad knowing that our work would be interpreted according to a set of idealized assumptions, and through my participation, I implicitly agreed to be part of this narrative.

Jennifer Lawrence has been the presumed frontrunner for the Best Actress Oscar since Silver Linings Playbook wowed critics at the Toronto Film Festival last fall.

But one person didn’t get the memo—Jennifer Lawrence. To be fair, she was busy at the time, reprising her role as Katniss Everdeen in Hunger Games: Catching Fire. And she doesn’t Google herself.

In October 2012, The Daily Beast sat down with Lawrence for a two-hour dinner, where she breezed through a number of topics—she’s a weird runner, she once stalked Daniel Radcliffe, and she auditioned for Silver Linings over Skype. Even though she’s only 22, she nailed Tiffany, a depressed widow who falls for Bradley Cooper. When I told Lawrence that the blogosphere had already decided she’d win the Oscar, she had no idea. And she gave one of her trademark off-the-cuff responses.