'In My Mind, There Was No Other Way'

Last year 44-year-old Robert Mack pleaded guilty to murdering a General Dynamics Corp. labor negotiator and attempting to murder his former supervisor in San Diego. Mack had worked at the company for 25 years as an assembly-line worker and missile mechanic. But the company says that Mack's performance deteriorated during the last year and he refused to take advantage of counseling services offered to employees. Now Mack is serving a life sentence at the California Men's Colony in San Luis Obispo. He talked with NEWSWEEK'S Patricia King about the shootings and what pushed him to the brink. Edited excerpts:

I had back problems and car problems. They changed the time of going to work from 6 a.m. to 5:30 a.m., which put me in a bind. I should have been given a slap on the wrist and been returned to work. My job performance was excellent. These are some of the things that companies do to cause people to go berserk.

It was shocking. Everything I had worked for in my life was over. I had no money. I had bills. I had no employment.

I never thought I'd have to go looking for any other job. I thought I was safe. I was 12 on the seniority list. I was never going to get laid off.

I had already made up my mind to terminate myself It had to be done back at General Dynamics. If I had done it at home they would have said it was a domestic dispute. That would have left General Dynamics off the hook. I had a speech I was going to use. I was going to say if those days off cost them so much money...I was going to give my I life and give them back their money in blood.

I wasn't able to talk at the hearing. They kept telling me to shut up, and I became angrier and angrier. I knew eve thing I had worked for in my life was over. I got frustrated. My hands started tingling. My mouth got dry, and then a big blank came over me. It was like a deep, bright, red flash. During that flash it looked like I was riding a black cat. That's all that I remember. I don't remember the shooting.

It was real. That was no hocus-pocus.

When I got the termination letter, the letter erupted in my hand, I tried to stomp it with my feet. I tried to crumble it, but the letter burst into flames. The TV burst into flames saying "termination." I put the TV off. I lay down on the bed, and the pillow burst into flames saying "terminated."

I never did use any drugs. They found that the four cigarettes that I bought that morning were laced with cocaine.

I guess the man I bought the cigarettes from.

Most definitely. I'm sorry for what I did. What happened to me that day was something that came over me. It was not myself who did it. it had to be another side of me.

At that particular time in my mind there was no other way.

Try to seek some kind of help. That is where I failed. I just kept it all inside. I didn't let anybody know what happened. I was embarrassed.