Is this a SCOTUS Hearing or 'Sportscenter'?

If there’s anything we really learned from the first day of Sonia Sotomayor’s Senate confirmation hearings, it’s this: senators LOVE their sports analogies. Just ask John Cornyn, who invoked football when talking about Sotomayor’s time as an appellate court judge. “A lower-court judge is like the quarterback who executes the plays—not the coach who calls the plays,” Cornyn said. “That means many of your cases don’t tell us much about your judicial philosophy. But a few of your opinions do raise questions—because they suggest the kinds of plays you’d call if you were promoted to the coaching staff.” Hmm. OK, yeah, we get it. (For the record, in Cornyn’s honor, your Gaggler is totally coining a new catchphrase—“activist quarterbacks”—for the rogue players who don’t listen to the coach. You heard it here first, ESPN!)

Everybody else went with baseball—and for this we hold Chief Justice John Roberts responsible. “Judges are like umpires,” Roberts said in his 2005 confirmation hearings. “Umpires don’t make the rules, they apply them. The role of an umpire and a judge is critical. They make sure everybody plays by the rules.” Well, Democrats have apparently been aching to push back on that premise for the last four years, as nearly every single one of them brought up the “umpire” argument in some way or another during their opening statements today. “Many can debate whether during his four years on the Supreme Court he actually has called pitches as they come or has tried to change the rules,” Schumer said, speaking of Roberts. Sotomayor’s record, he insisted, shows that she’s “simply called balls and strikes for 17 years.” Sen. Dick Durbin, meanwhile, got in a little dig at Roberts’s umpire analogy, noting, “It’s hard to see home plate from right field.” Ooh, face!

No doubt this isn't the last we've heard of these analogies. It's a given that someone will bring up the "umpire" when senators begin questioning Sotomayor tomorrow. Or maybe Sotomayor will bring up a whole other sports analogy on her own. Judges are like ... NBA refs?