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Guy Ritchie says he still loves Madonna—but he’s got a funny way of showing it. In a revealing interview in the November issue of Esquire, Madge’s movie-director ex calls her “retarded” in between rambling descriptions of the queen of pop’s staying power: “She’s a manifester, if there ever was one. First-rate manifester. Put Madonna up against any 23-year-old, she’ll outwork them, outdance them, outperform them. The woman is broad.” The foul-mouthed Ritchie, who has two children with Madonna, goes on to sing the praises of Brazilian jujitsu, his son’s Xbox skills, and Richoux marmalade. His movie Sherlock Holmes comes out in December.