‘Sue You!’

Sarah Palin’s Newly Released Emails Reenvisioned as Poems

There is comedic verse hidden inside the newly released Palin emails. Michael Solomon, author of I Hope Like Heck, unearths more poems by the Belle of Wasilla.

J. Scott Applewhite / AP Photo

On Feb. 23, the state of Alaska released more than 17,000 emails from former governor Sarah Palin’s final months in office. As in her previous cache of correspondence, the emails contain new comedic verse by the Belle of Wasilla worthy of the poems in her 2011 collection published by Byliner Originals, I Hope Like Heck.

Are You Flippin Kidding???

Oh GOD help us.Are you flippin kidding???Todd doesn’t have $12 millionObviouslyThat’s something else,I don’t know what it stands forYet.Put this is a statement,Others have asked about my opinionOn this latest:But I hadn’t seen itSo didn’t know it was thisAsinine!!!

Marital Problems

SoSpeaking of…If we,Er,When weGet a divorce,Does that quellThe ‘conflict of interest’ accusationWith BP?

Enquiring Minds

Stupidly ridiculous.LikeThey just ran a story last weekSaying“See, we were right!Bristol does drugsVia Sherry Johnston”Or some stupid thingThat the kids sawOn the coverWhile shoppingAt WalMart.

A Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy

I know.And I just told someone:We’re not paranoidThey really are after us!:)

Today I Am Wearing

This would be hilariousIf it wasn’t so expensiveFor the state to process these accusationsAnd for me to defendAgainst the bogus harassments.Yes,I wore Arctic Cat snowgearAt a snowmachine event,Because it was cold outside,And by the wayToday I am wearing Alaska’s own Paige Adams’ jeansAnd Alaska’s Romney Dodd-Ortland hand-painted clogs.When will I see the ethics chargeFor wearing these?

Sue You!

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My sistersShould sueTheir tabloid ass.

Palin-sanity

KTVA did a story tonightReporting“Levi Johnston said heAnd BristolPractice safe sex,Most of the time”.When has a teen’s sex lifeEVERBeen reported onIn the news?NeverHave I heard a celebrity,A criminal,Anyone’sSex lifeReported as aHardNews story.ThisIs insane.