Stephen Colbert wasted no time getting political on Tuesday night’s Late Show. And his target was the health of America’s two major presidential candidates.
Over the past few weeks, Donald Trump has been speculating that Hillary Clinton is too frail to fight ISIS, with his surrogates fueling conspiracy theories that the former secretary of state is secretly dying. It’s a charge that Clinton did her best to shut down on Colbert’s late-night rival Jimmy Kimmel’s show the night before.
Most notably, former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani urged voters to google “Hillary Clinton illness” to find out the truth for themselves. The only problem, as Colbert sees it, is that a search of that term brings up Giuliani’s comments.
“Here’s what's happening,” the host said. “Giuliani says she’s not healthy, and you can look it up on the internet. And when you look it up on the internet, it says that Giuliani says she’s not healthy and to look it up on the internet. It’s an endless loop. It’s like a snake with its tail in its mouth. Or a man with his head up his own ass.”
Colbert went on to say he’s “not surprised” that Giuliani was able to diagnose Clinton so well, because both he and Trump are “experts on female anatomy.” As proof, he pointed to an actual video they made in 2000 in which Giuliani appears in drag and Trump tells him how “beautiful” he is.
“Now, obviously, that’s shocking, and you’re going to want to verify that video,” Colbert said. “Just go online and put down ‘Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani, drag queen, motorboat.’”
Colbert isn’t buying the Clinton “conspiracy theories,” accusing them of saying she’s “frail” or “weak” when they’re “just tip-toeing around the medical condition that you’re really upset about, one that no other president in history has ever faced.”
“Hillary Clinton has chronic no-penis,” Colbert explained. “It’s congenital. Every woman in her family has had the same thing.”