Catherine Zeta-Jones joked that 'saucy' Prince Charles had got a little too familiar with her boobs while pinning a medal on her chest when she appeared on the David Letterman show last night.

Shown a picture of her being presented with the award, Catherine said: ‘Look at his hands! Check out his hands, I dunno. I love the royal family but he is being a little saucy."

Letterman asked: "Is that to do with the award?"

She replied: "No. I just think that’s my breast actually."

The kiss may have been awkward, but their marriage wasn't a sham.

 Prince Albert of Monaco has accepted a high court apology and substantial damages from the Sunday Times over "seriously defamatory allegations" that he had entered a sham marriage with Charlene Wittstock.

The prince sued the News International paper following the publication of the article in July 2011 for damages of more than £300,000, but the high court heard on Tuesday morning that the exact settlement has yet to be agreed. The Sunday Times will also pay Prince Albert's legal costs.

Pippa Middleton sure does love her European aristocrats. Last time she went to a big Euro-bash, it was her pal Arthur de Soultrait in Paris who was hosting - and we wound up with toy gun-gate.

This time she's joined the Freres, Belgium's richest family for a hunting party in which six wild boar and nine deers were killed, according to Belgian newspaper La Capitale.

The hunt in Gerpinnes, south of Charleroi, took place in December and was organised by the two grandsons of Belgian billionaire industrialist Albert Frere, William, 27, and Cedric, 28.

The Frere family  refused to comment to La Capitale about whether or not the Duchess of Cambridge's sister was present, saying only 'hunting is a private affair'.

It's the kind of death that would suit the most dramatic of fashionistas - being killed by the revolving door at Vogue House.

And yesterday, that grim fate befell Tatler magazine's in-house mascot, a young Dachsund named Alan, arguably the most well-connected dog in Britain.

The revolving door through which  generations of celebrities and stylists have walked into the offices of Vogue, GQ and Tatler was transformed into the jaws of death for Alan - or Alan TBH Plumptre to give him his full name - after the small beast bounded forwards into the revolving door when being taken out for a walk by a hapless staffer whose identity has not been revealed.

It was by all accounts a grisly scene, but contrary to early reports on Twitter, Alan was not decapitated by the door, but although the London Fire brigade arrived on  with ten men to try and free him, he was pronounced dead at the scene.

Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie may have been squeezed off the royal payroll, but the feisty young princesses clearly have no intention of vanishing quietly into thin air. The girls will roar back into the public eye on Thursday when they will whizz through the streets of the German city of Berlin in a Union Jack-branded Mini, as part of a British trade push in the city.

The trip – organized by the British government’s Foreign Office who invited the young princesses to be part of it – will be read by many as a symbolic fightback by the glamorous York girls, who were squeezed out of this year’s Jubilee celebrations when they were excluded from the balcony appearance by Prince Charles, who has let it be known they will have to get jobs and cannot expect to be supported by the royal firm.

A source said the girls were ‘happy’ to be asked to participate by the Foreign Office. The girls’ father, Prince Andrew, who had to resign as trade ambassador after his friendship with pedophile Jeffrey Epstein was exposed, will likely see it as vindication of his belief that his girls still have much to offer their country.

Here at the Royalist we like to keep up with what's going on international royal circles, even though our own royals are clearly the most interesting.

In Euro-royal news, the King of Spain is facing further questions about his relationship with blonde German aristocrat Corinna zu Sayn-Wittgenstein, who famously accompanied him on an elephant-hunting trip while his country battled austerity.

The latest incident involves the King's son-in-law, Inaki Urdangarin, who is accused of embezzling public funds through a non-profit organisation he headed on the island of Majorca.

Kate has made it clear that she doesn't want to employ a nanny for their baby, but that doesn't mean she couldn't use a little help around the house.
The couple are advertising for a full-time Person-Friday to look after their home and walk their dogs.

The royal couple are advertising for a "discreet, loyal and reliable" servant to help manage their house, according to job notice posted on Buckingham Palace's internal employment board, which calls for someone to provide "a high standard of housekeeping" for William and Kate at their new Kensington Palace home.

"Discretion, loyalty and reliability are paramount," the advertisement reads. "Attention to detail, together with a flexible and pro-active approach is essential."

As well as cleaning, main duties include, walking the couple's dog Lupo, polishing silver and glassware, running errands, preparing basic meals and doing laundry — all in 37 hours a week (though the successful candidate must be willing to work extra hours when required).

The Royal baby is due in July, it was announced today.

And sources told the Royalist today that Kate's twelve week scan showed that Kate is NOT having twins, sparing the young royals a succession headache which could have arisen in the case of a caesarian delivery of twins. There are twins in both William and Kate's bloodlines.

In a short official statement,  St James' Palace said, "Their Royal Highnesses The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are delighted to confirm they are expecting a baby in July. The Duchess's condition continues to improve since her stay in hospital last month."

It is believed that Kate has now had her 12-week scan. The couple were bounced into going public with the news of the pregnancy  at a very early stage after Kate became extremely ill with a rare and acute form of morning sickness and had to be admitted to hospital. She may have been less than eight weeks pregnant at that stage as she is now thought to be between 13 and 14 weeks.

Her first official portrait may be hideous, but Kate and her bump were a thing of beauty as they visited the National Portrait Gallery together with babyfather William today.

Kate smiled broadly as she was confronted with her first official portrait, which appears to show her in ten years time, and clutched her hands protectively over her burgeoning belly. She wore a simple dress from high street chain Whistles.

OMFG! What happened? How does one manage to make a gorgeous, youthful and lithe woman like Kate look like this elderly spinster?

Believe it or not, this is not some provocative project cooked up by an attention seeking art student (or Morrissey) aiming to show us what Kate would look like if she was twenty years older, smoked, never washed her hair and ate junk food, but her first official portrait.

Obligingly, Kate has declared herself 'delighted' with the result, but few of Kate's fans seem likely to agree with he generous assesment. The Royalist, just back from vacation so excuse the long silence, is, quite frankly, horrified, shocked and astonished. It's an 'unwelcome home' present.

Bizarre cravings are a part of many pregnancies and it seems Kate Middleton is no exception - she has been combatting her chronic morning sickness by munching her way through lavender biscuits made by Charles's firm Duchy Originals.

The lavender-infused shortbread biscuits were recommended to her by her step mother-in-law Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall, according to the Sun, which says that Charles and Camilla have been sending Kate boxes of the unusual biscuits, sold by London store Fortnum and Mason.

A few drops of lavender in a bath is often thought to combat morning sickness.

Cancel all police leave! Prince Harry is expected home within days, according to a UK newspaper, and he's planning to hit the town to hard to make up for missing out on the Christmas party season.

The 28-year-old prince has been serving a four month tour of duty in the war zone as an Apache helicopter pilot. And while it had previously been confirmed that he'd return to the UK in January, the Daily Star now reports that his homecoming is expected "within days."

Down at the Arts Club, they'll no doubt be laying in extra supplies of vodka, champagne and skinny blonde socialites.

There are plenty who question the long-term PR wisdom of sending Prince Harry off to Afghanistan to kill, and now a powerful Afghan warlord has accused Prince Harry of being a 'jackal' who is killing innocents in Afghanistan.

In an interview with The Daily Telegraph Gulbuddin Hekmatyar, who has been designated a global terrorist by the United States, said,  "The British Prince comes to Afghanistan to kill innocent Afghans while he is drunk. He wants to hunt down Mujaheddin with his helicopter rockets without any shame.

"But he does not understand this simple fact that the hunting of Afghan lions and eagles is not that easy. Jackals cannot hunt lions."