By Aislinn Laing
The 54-year-old pop star, who has adopted two children from the impoverished African country, wanted the Malawian government to "roll out a red carpet and blast the 21-gun salute in her honor", according to the statement in the name of President Joyce Banda.
It was "strange and depressing", the statement said, that Madonna appeared to want Malawi's gratitude for her adoption of David and Mercy.
"Kindness, as far as its ordinary meaning is concerned, is free and anonymous. If it can't be free and silent, it is something else. Blackmail is the closest it becomes."
Malawi's State House rejected claims that Mrs Banda had refused to see Madonna because she sacked her sister as head of her charity in the country and rubbished her assertion that she had built 10 schools there, saying she should "learn as a matter of urgency the decency of telling the truth".
"Madonna feels that the Malawi Government and its leadership should have abandoned everything and attended to her because she believes she is a music star turned benefactor who is doing Malawi good," it read.
"For her to tell the whole world that she is building schools in Malawi when she has actually only contributed to the construction of classrooms is not compatible with manners of someone who thinks she deserves to be revered with state grandeur," Tusekele Mwanyongo, a State House press officer, wrote.
Madonna's relationship with Malawi began in 2006 with David's adoption, but soured after a report accused many of the local staff running her Raising Malawi charity of financial impropriety. She returned to Malawi last week to review the progress of her plan to build 10 community schools, and asked for an audience with the president in a hand-written note.
Not only did the visit not take place but there followed a series of angry statements from the Malawian government about the singer's claims to have built schools.