10 Summer Schlockbusters!

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel
Director: Michael Bay
Release Date: June 2009

“A pile of glittering junk!”
—Joe Morgenstern, The Wall Street Journal

“An impossibly, incomprehensibly overlong and cacophonous bore!”
—Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor

Box office:
Domestic (to date): $201.2 million
International (to date): $190.3 million

Terminator 4: Salvation

Starring: Christian Bale, Helena Bonham Carter
Director: McG
Release Date: May 2009

“It's brainless, it's soulless, and it gave me a headache!”
—Chris Tookey, The Daily Mail

“A shambolic, deafening, intelligence-insulting mess!”
—Tom Huddleston, Time Out London

“A mindless farrago of collisions and explosions!”
—Evan Williams, The Australian.

Box Office:
Domestic: $121.9 million
International: $220.0 million

Angels & Demons

Starring: Tom Hanks, Ewan McGregor
Director: Ron Howard
Release Date: May 2009

“Catholic torture porn!”
—Bob Grimm, The Tucson Weekly.

“A plodding, exhausting adventure!”
—Jeffrey K. Lyles, The Maryland Gazette

Box Office:
Domestic: $130.2 million
International: $337.5 million

Fast & Furious 4

Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster, Michelle Rodriguez
Director: Justin Lin
Release Date: April 2009

“Jerkily edited car porn!”
—Alistair Harkness, The Scotsman

“Feels like at least four hours!”
—Lou Lumenick, The New York Post

Box Office:
Domestic: $155 million
International: $193.9 million

The Passion of the Christ

Starring: Jim Caviezel
Director: Mel Gibson
Release Date: February 2004

“A primitive and pornographic bloodbath!”
—Johnathan Rosenbaum, The Chicago Reader.

“A compendium of tortures that would horrify the regulars at an S&M club!”
—Jami Bernard, The New York Daily News

“A grimly unilluminating procession of treachery, beatings, blood, and agony!”
—David Denby, The New Yorker.

Box Office:
Domestic: $370.3 million
International: $240 million

Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man’s Chest

Starring: Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Jack Davenport, Bill Nighy
Director: Gore Verbinski
Release Date: July 2006

“All the appeal of a seaweed sandwich!”
—Anthony Lane, The New Yorker

“The very definition of water torture!”
—Brandon Fibbs, BrandonFibbs.com

Box Office:
Domestic: $423.3 million
International: $642 million

Pearl Harbor

Starring: Ben Affleck, Josh Hartnett, Kate Beckinsale, Cuba Gooding Jr., Jon Voight, Alec Baldwin
Director: Michael Bay
Release Date: May 2001

“Bore-a, Bore-a, Bore-a!”
—Desson Howe, Washington Post.

“Littered with low points!”
—Joe Morgenstern, The Wall Street Journal.

Box Office:
Domestic: $198.5 million
International: $251.5 million

Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace

Starring: Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, Natalie Portman
Director: George Lucas
Release Date: May 19, 1999

“So incoherent, so completely bereft of a grand adventure's surging thrills!”
—Charles Taylor, Salon.

“The biggest letdown since the Clinton presidency!”
—Andrew Essex, CitySearch.

Box Office:
Domestic: $431.1 million
International: $492 million

Night at the Museum

Starring: Ben Stiller, Carla Gugino, Dick Van Dyke, Mickey Rooney, Ricky Gervais
Director: Shawn Levy
Release Date: December 22, 2006

“Fun for the whole family? Probably not!”
—Jeff Pevere, Toronto Star.

“All the warmth of an Ice Age fossil!”
—Thomas Delapa, Boulder Weekly

Box Office:
Domestic: $250.9 million
International: $322.8 million

Sex and the City: The Movie

Starring: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon, Chris Noth, Candice Bergen, Jennifer Hudson
Director: Michael Patrick King
Release Date: May 2008

“The crack of rock-bottom giving way to a whole deeper layer of magma!
—Rick Groen, The Globe and Mail

“Made me laugh out loud precisely once!”
—Anthony Lane, The New Yorker

Box Office:
Domestic: $152.6 million
International: $257.4 million

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