King Charles?

06.07.124:02 AM ET

Five Reasons Charles Should not be King

Jubilee fails to win over Allison Pearson to King Charles

A fire-breathing op-ed in the house organ of the monarchy, the Daily Telegraph, today, by Allison Pearson in which she assembles the post-Jubilee arguments against King Charles:

LONDON, ENGLAND - JUNE 03:  Prince Charles, Prince of Wales and Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall arrive at Chelsea Pier on June 3, 2012 in London, England. For only the second time in its history the UK celebrates the Diamond Jubilee of a monarch. Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II celebrates the 60th anniversary of her ascension to the throne. Thousands of well-wishers from around the world have flocked to London to witness the spectacle of the weekend's celebrations. The Queen along with all members of the royal family will participate in a River Pageant with a flotilla of a 1,000 boats accompanying them down The Thames, the star studded free concert at Buckingham Palace, and a carriage procession and a service of thanksgiving at St Paul's Cathedral.  (Photo by Bethany Clarke - WPA Pool/Getty Images)
Bethany Clarke, WPA / Getty Images

1.The Queen’s eldest son and founder of Duchy Originals, "makes an excellent grocer, shame about the future king bit.”

2. "I wonder how many people who saw the Duchess of Cornwall seated on Tuesday afternoon in the State Landau thought: “What on earth is that woman doing in the Queen’s carriage?” It can’t just be me, can it?"

3. "What will it feel like to have a monarch who is on public record as wanting to be reincarnated as his mistress’s Tampax?"

4.  The Queen has 4 private secretaries; Charles has 11.

And, the killer blow, 5) Pearson says that the fact that, "Not one single image of the late Diana, Princess of Wales" was shown in the montage celebrating the Queen’s reign during the Jubilee concert, "looked both ungracious and fearful".

Food for thought.