Harry Not Coming to America
Woeful news for those who hoped, on foot of today’s story in the Daily Express, that Prince Harry was contemplating a move to America to become a “Top Gun” helicopter pilot instructor.
Harry did indeed have a brilliant time in America last year, snogging cocktail waitresses, riding Harleys and partying in Vegas, but the Express’s story that he was considering moving to the US to continue his military career because “security issues make it difficult for him to be treated as a normal soldier” has been shot down like a rogue plane in a Maverick / Ice Man gun battle.
“It’s not true,” a palace spokesman tells the Royalist. “The Prince is fully committed to staying in the British Army as an Apache pilot for at least the normal tour of duty (approximately three years).”