Seriously?

01.16.14

10 Facts about the 2014 Oscar Nominations That Will Make You Sad

Did you know that Jonah Hill now has more acting Oscar nominations than Robert Redford? That, and 9 other reasons to be sad today.

The 2014 Academy Award nominations were announced this morning, and we are sad. Boy, are we sad. Here all the reasons why: 

Jonah Hill has more acting Oscar nominations than Robert Redford.

It is now "Academy Award nominated film Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa." It was nominated for makeup and hairstyling alongside—get this—The Lone Ranger.

Jennifer Lawrence is 23 years old and has three Oscar nominations. She's the youngest person to ever rack up three nods. (This one just makes you sad about yourself and what you were doing when you were 23.)

Inside Llewyn Davis only got a nomination for cinematography. Neither the movie nor its star, Oscar Isaac, managed to get in. Read Vanity Fair's Richard Lawson's tweet and mourn that tragedy: "Particularly confusing and dismaying morning for Oscar Isaac's google alerts, I'd imagine."

Only one of the top 10 highest grossing movies of the year made it into Best Picture, Gravity. That's not the sad thing. The sad thing is the list of other films on that list of 10: Fast & Furious 6, Man of Steel, Thor: The Dark World, Iron Man 3...

No movie received nominations in each of the four acting categories in 31 years. David O. Russell managed to do it two years in a row with Silver Linings Playbook and now American Hustle. (This one makes you sad for Emma Thompson. And Robert Redford, who were snubbed so that this could happen.)

This is the 82nd year that there are no women nominated for Best Director. Of course, it's not even like there was anyone to nominate.

Six of the nine Best Picture nominees are rated R. The rest are PG-13. This is sad if you're not an adult. Or have a family. Or are even slightly wholesome. 

The 16 top-rated movies according to Rotten Tomatoes were not nominated for Best Picture. Only two, Gravity and 12 Years a Slave, of the top 40 were. 

And, finally, Oprah Winfrey will not be competing for Best Supporting Actress on Oscar night. You are all being given special dispensation from the president if you feel as if you need to remain bedridden and skip work for the next three weeks to mourn properly.