Donald Trump Seriously Schlonged Himself
Donald Trump’s latest lie is that “schlonged,” a word exclusively used to describe a penis, is instead a verb that is “often used in politics” and means “got beaten badly.”
“When I said that Hillary Clinton got schlonged by Obama, it meant got beaten badly. The media knows this. Often used word in politics!” Trump tweeted at 10:37 on Tuesday night. On Monday, Trump used the term at a rally in Michigan to describe Clinton’s 2008 loss to Barack Obama in the race for the Democratic presidential nomination.
According to Lexis-Nexis, the largest searchable online database of print publications, newspapers, and radio or television transcripts—in some cases dating back to the 19th century, the word “schlong” has been used in the media five times in total, and only once as a verb in 2011.
NPR host Neal Conan appears to be the only other person to have used “schlonged” as a verb on the air to the refer to the defeat of Walter Mondale and Geraldine Ferraro’s campaign for the presidency in 1984.
“That ticket went on to get schlonged at the polls, but that’s a historic moment.”
On Wednesday, Conan himself told The Washington Post that “schlonged” is, in fact, a penis joke.
Every other instance in the media clearly refers to a penis.
A 2007 usage of the word “schlonged” comes from the television show The Man Show and is spoken by Jimmy Kimmel:
“The Pioneers—those delightful vaginas of yesteryear. And you’ll meet their donkey-schlonged male counterparts in volume 3.”
“Thomas Jane’s formidably schlonged sports coach struts through Detroit’s crumbling streets before stripping off for a spot of daytime skinny-dipping,” Jimi Famurewa wrote.
Just last year, the London Evening Standard used the word to describe the penis of porn star Dirk Diggler, as played by Mark Wahlberg in Boogie Nights.
“In the playful porn epic Boogie Nights, Hoffman is Scotty J, the gauche gay boom operator with a crush on long-schlonged superstar, Dirk Diggler.”
Seventeen days later, The Daily Star used the term to describe the frequently nude Celebrity Big Brother contestant Dappy Zissman.
“Hitting Hakkasan in Mayfair, pint-sized and long-schlonged Dapster posed with his loveable fruit loop LuLu for snappers.”
The word is, however, not “often used in politics”—except by Trump himself. According to The Washington Post, Trump has used it once before, in 2011.
“I watched a popular Republican woman [Jane Corwin] not only lose but get schlonged by a Democrat [Kathy Hochul] nobody ever heard of for the congressional seat, and that was because, simply, because of the Paul Ryan plan,” Trump said.
In the past, Trump has called women “fat pigs,” “slobs,” and “disgusting animals.” Earlier in the year, Trump said Fox News’s Megyn Kelly had “blood coming out of her wherever” after she questioned him during a Fox-sponsored Republican debate.
According to a Quinnipiac poll, Trump leads the GOP field with 28 percent of registered Republicans.
“It is a shame that the biased media is able to so incorrectly define a word for the public when they know that the definition is wrong. Sad!” Trump tweeted shortly after midnight.
It was the sixth of seven Trump tweets about the word “schlong” in 12 hours.