With all due disrespect to Bill Cosby, in recent months, Family Values activist and unrepentant breeder Josh Duggar is waging a valiant effort for the title: ‘Biggest Scumbag of 2015.’
Yes, in the past few months, Josh Duggar, the fundamentalist Christian and star of the reality series 19 Kids and Counting, has not only admitted to molesting his own then-underage sisters, but also having multiple accounts with the recently compromised adultery website AshleyMadison.com and sleeping around on his poor wife, who gave birth to the couple’s fourth child on July 19.
So naturally, the self-admitted “hypocrite” was easy pickings for Bill Maher, the outspoken host of HBO’s Real Time with Bill Maher.
“You know Josh Duggar?” asked Maher. “The one from the 19 and Counting Duggar family? The super Christian family? He had two accounts. He was cheating on his wife, and he was cheating on the woman he was cheating with! And in May, he had to admit he was molesting his sisters when he was a teenager. I say forget about building a wall around Mexico—build a wall around Josh Duggar.”
“It must be so great to be an evangelical Christian,” Maher continued. “Jesus always forgives no matter what you do. And this is Josh Duggar’s second apology in three months. He made a statement today: ‘I am the biggest hypocrite ever because I espouse family values, and I’m a total pervert, and that’s why tonight I’d like to announce my candidacy for the Republican nomination for President of the United States.”
Speaking of Republican nominees for POTUS, Maher, who has been sued by The Donald in the past over a joke (really), saved his biggest criticism for the anti-immigrant stance of elaborately coiffed blowhard Donald Trump. “The Republicans are tearing their hair out,” Maher said. “Now, doctors say the Trump that has been growing inside them is inoperable. Yes, Donald Trump, America’s great Irish hope, unveiled his immigration plan this week—and it is huge. It’s a three-point plan called Cinco de Bye-o. Here are the plans: repeal the 14th amendment, seize the wages of illegal immigrants who are working here, use that money to build a wall, and then deport all 11 million of them. Is any of this possible? No. But it gave millions of Fox News viewers their first erection in years.”
Maher then laid into Trump on the hypocrisy of his anti-immigrant stance, since two out of three Trump wives have been Eastern European immigrants with tenuous grasps of the English language.“Nobody brings this up about Donald Trump, who is always on about, ‘We can’t have foreigners coming into this country!’” said Maher. “His first wife is from Czechoslovakia. His current wife is from Slovenia. So, if you think crawling under a wall is the most disgusting way to become an American, somewhere there is a Panamanian woman hiding in a truck full of chickens with ten pounds of heroin-filled condoms in her stomach who’s thinking, ‘Well, at least I didn’t have to blow Donald Trump.’”