GOLDILOCKS GUEST

Florida Man Found Cooking and Getting Ready for a Bath in Stranger’s Home to Avoid His Angry Wife

He reportedly told deputies he had been staying in the house after a fight with his wife.

A 44-year-old Florida man was found cooking dinner and running a bath in a stranger’s home after allegedly breaking in to avoid his wife’s wrath, authorities said. According to the Polk County Sheriff’s Office, deputies responded to a home in Davenport on June 9 after a vigilant neighbor—tasked with watching the property—noticed lights going on and off inside the home. When law enforcement entered, they found the man, identified only as “Joe”, cooking and running himself a bath. Joe reportedly told deputies he had been staying in the house after a fight with his wife and admitted he neither had permission to be there nor knew who owned the property. Joe was charged with felony unarmed burglary, misdemeanor petit theft, and domestic battery, reported the Miami Herald. “We assume the bath temperature was not too hot, nor too cold, but juuuuust right,” the sheriff’s office teased in a press release, likening the incident to a real-life Goldilocks tale—minus the bears. “It’s one of those things where you just have to grin and bear it.”