DOOM AND GLOOM

Fox Host Delivers Bleak Election Verdict Before Results Roll In

Jesse Watters is already accepting defeat in the midterm elections.

Fox News star Jesse Watters is already throwing his hands up in defeat for Republicans in the midterm elections.

Hours before polls in hotly contested states even closed, Watters, 48, shared some depressing thoughts about the GOP’s prospects heading into the evening.

“I don’t feel great,” he confessed on The Five. “I feel like I’m about to play a game that I know I’m going to lose; I’m just trying not to get hurt. And getting hurt would mean you lose the Senate. And right now the Senate is very much in play, and it’s making me angry.”

“But I knew this was coming; everybody knew this was coming,” he continued. “It was just: How bad is it going to be?”

Watters, who lives in an upscale New Jersey suburb, offered some anecdotal evidence from his Election Day encounters to explain his pessimism.

“When I woke up this morning, I went and voted, and I was in a good mood because all the people at the polling station know me, and they wanted photos. And they said, you know, ‘Jesse, a lot of our people came out this morning; they’re listening to what you’re saying,’ and I’m like, ‘great.’”

But a trip to a local tire store sent his mood south.

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“The guy behind the counter… African American… he knew me, so he’s like, ‘Oh, you voted?’” Watters recalled. “I was like, ‘Did you vote?’ He’s like, ‘No, I have to work all day.’”

“So that made me a little nervous, but then I looked at him: you don’t know how he’s going to vote,” Watters said.

Self-described comedian Greg Gutfeld chimed in with an inexplicable zinger about the tire store employee, saying, “Also, he doesn’t have a photo ID.”

New Jersey does not require a photo ID to vote.

Watters then explained that he was also discouraged by the Election Day plans of some people working on his house.

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“Then, I have two white contractors at the house… and I’m like ‘Did you guys vote?’ and they’re like ‘Not yet,’ and I’m like ‘Come on! Leave my house and go vote!’ But I kinda wanted them to get going, so they didn’t,” he admitted.

“But, like, they didn’t have a plan. Now if Trump was on the ballot, these guys would have already voted, you know. You’ve got two middle-aged white guys, they would have been there… but he’s not on the ballot,” Watters said. “So we’re just supposed to pretend, and we’re all pretending he’s on the ballot, but really deep down we know he’s not on the ballot.”

Co-host Dana Perino asked, “Are we in therapy with you?”

When asked to weigh in on Election Day enthusiasm, Fox’s resident liberal Jessica Tarlov offered a different perspective.

“This idea that folks who are turning out today—and a lot of them are despite Jesse’s focus group of three or four this morning—they are seeing folks like Roy Cooper and Josh Ture, and Annie Andrews and Sherrod Brown, and they’re not afraid of them,” Tarlov said.

“They don’t think that they are communists; they don’t think they are socialists; they don’t think that they are going to transition their kids when they go out to the grocery store,” she continued.

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“And that’s how, if this is to be a good night, Democrats will have accomplished something big,” she added.

Meanwhile, President Donald Trump revealed that he had to turn off his favorite cable news channel because he found Tarlov’s voice too bothersome.

“Watching the Pre-Election Results on FoxNews, but I can’t stand Jessica Tarlov’s voice—DUMB AS A ROCK, but it’s the voice that gets me,” the president ranted. “Have to go somewhere else until that LOSER is off the air—I’ll be back later!”

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