TROLL OR TREAT

Newsom Trolls Trump’s Top Goons With Nightmare Halloween Costumes

The governor has ideas in case people want to dress up as their favorite Trump lackey.

California Gov. Gavin Newsom helpfully provided some Halloween costume ideas for anyone scrambling at the last minute, posting a series of costumes inspired by members of the Trump administration online.

The trick costumes poke fun at those who have secured power at the top of Trump’s tree, Pete Hegseth, Brooke Rollins, ICE Barbie Krisie Noem, and vaccine skeptic Robert F. Kennedy Jr..

The first post is captioned, “Presenting: Sloshed Signal Leaking Specter” and is a costume inspired by Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth.

The Spirit Halloween costume kit for Hegseth includes a flask of water, razors for all troops (referencing the rant he delivered to top military leaders last month), a revolving door of employees, the wrong Signal chat, a skateboard, and an axe.

It warns that not included are the ability to do a pull up, an invite to a strip club, questionable tattoos (Hegseth has over a dozen), and an email from Mom.

The next potential costume idea is of Agriculture Secretary Brooke Rollins, and comes with a ‘Farm girl’ wardrobe, Fox & Friends cue cards, Argentinian steaks, and climate change denial flashcards.

Unfortunately for an. Ag Sec., the costume does not contain agricultural experience, funds for SNAP, and compassion for 42 million Americans. The Trump administration has decided to not make use of the program’s contingency reserve, meaning millions of Americans are at risk of going without food.

The third costume shared by Newsom is of everybody’s favorite ICE Barbie, Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem, dubbed “Kosplay Kristi” in this instance.

Her costume comes with LARP kits for every occasion, ICE raid aviators, and her own personal camera crew. Not included are a lifetime ban from Petco—likely a reference to an incident where she shot and killed her puppy—a selfie with Kim Jong Un or a voodoo doll of the South Park writers.

Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker also took aim at Noem on Thursday, joking that she must love Halloween “because she always dresses in law enforcement costumes.”

The comment came after Noem rejected Pritzker’s request for the Department of Homeland Security to pause its Operation Midway Blitz for Halloween.

“We know Kristi Noem must love Halloween because she always dresses in law enforcement costumes, but what is truly shameful is that she refuses to agree that we shouldn’t tear gas children trick or treating,” the governor wrote on X.

The fourth and final costume posted by Newsom’s office on Thursday night is of Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. It includes a measles party invitation, a CDC resignation rolodex, and jeans for the gym, something Kennedy has claimed he wears because he usually heads to the gym right after hiking.

Not included in the costume are the dead bear cub Kennedy admitted to dumping in Central Park, the brain matter the worm ate, or Tylenol, which Kennedy has claimed causes autism in babies when taken by pregnant women.

Though it’s not clear which member of the Trump administration, if any, Newsom himself would be dressing up as for Halloween, there’s always the scariest option, Trump himself.

Play Video

More specifically, dressing up as Trump brandishing a photo of his own assassination attempt in front of a bunch of children trick or treating at the White House.

See more of our coverage in your search results.

ADD THE DAILY BEAST ON GOOGLE

Catherine BourisReporter

Got a tip? Send it to The Daily Beast here.