Hill-arious
Look Bad Faster with Hillary’s Pantsuit T-Shirt
Hillary Clinton is taking her “woman of the people” message to a whole new level. Meet the pantsuit T-shirt.
shop.hillaryclinton.com
If you have ever thought, “I would like to look as unfashionable as possible but classic pantsuits require too much effort for my casual lifestyle,” you are in luck, because Hillary Clinton is now selling "The Everyday Pantsuit Tee,” a T-shirt with a pantsuit printed on the front.
Clinton—long the pantsuit’s most public proponent—is known for owning a literal rainbow of the garment in colors ranging from khaki to sky blue to orange and carnation pink. Mocking her own affinity for the school guidance counselor garb is Clinton’s most frequently deployed comedic device.
In 2000, during her Senate victory speech, Clinton quipped, “62 counties, 16 months, three debates, two opponents and six black pantsuits later, because of you, we are here.”
She’s told pantsuit jokes to Bravo’s Andy Cohen and to David Letterman. On Twitter, she describes herself as a “pantsuit aficionado.”
The Everyday Pantsuit Tee, however, really takes things to another level—but then Clinton, who has for decades been criticized for being too shrill or whatever, stands to benefit from cultivating a reputation as someone capable and eager to engage in self-deprecating humor.
And so on Tuesday, Clinton launched her official campaign store wherein she sells all the expected items: bumper stickers, coffee mugs, hats, water bottles, buttons, spare car parts, etc.
The unisex pantsuit T-shirt, reminiscent of the ubiquitous tuxedo T-shirt sold on boardwalks and in Spencer’s Gifts in malls across America, has the distinction of being the most aesthetically unappealing piece of political paraphernalia that I have ever had the displeasure of laying eyes on.
The color of a maraschino cherry, the print features three buttons, two pockets, a double strand of pearls and an “H” logo pin.
On the back, it says “Pantsuit Up.” It is truly horrific in every imaginable way and for just $30 (plus shipping and handling) it can be yours in a size Small, Medium, Large, Extra Large, or Extra Extra Large.
God bless America.