fear not

Pentagon Has Zombie Apocalypse Plan

Disclaimer: Not a joke.

This is not a test. The Defense Department actually has a plan in place in case zombies invade the earth and the military has to destroy them to “preserve the sanctity of human life.” In a secret military computer network, a document called CONOP 8888 provides a how-to defense against the undead. “This plan fulfills fictional contingency-planning guidance tasking for U.S. Strategic Command to develop a comprehensive [plan] to undertake military operations to preserve ‘non-zombie’ humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde,” the summary says. Amazingly, under disclaimers, a note reads: “This plan was not actually designed as a joke.” A Strategic Command spokeswoman, however, says the document is just a training tool.