‘CONTEXTS CHANGE’

Prince Charles Makes Radical Decision Not to Accept Cash Donations

It’s been at least five whole years since Charles last accepted over a million dollars stuffed into a carrier bag, a source told the BBC. That’s alright then sire!

Prince Charles has sportingly made the decision, entirely of his own accord, not to accept gigantic cash donations in future. Especially, one imagines, banknotes stuffed into plastic carrier bags, suitcases, and travel bags. The prince’s decision reported by British media today comes after his office expressed hurt bemusement over the weekend that Charles should the subject of criticism after he was accused of impropriety, ineptitude and a woeful lack of judgement for a man who expects to be king, merely because he had personally accepted three different donations of €1 million ($1.05 million) each from a controversial Qatari politician, former Prime Minister Sheikh Hamad bin Jassim. A source told the BBC: “Situations, contexts change over the years. I can say with certainty that for more than half a decade, this has not happened and it would not happen again.” On one occasion the money, which was always comprised of €500 notes, commonly known as “bin Ladens” among the European criminal class owing to their popularity with terror networks, was stuffed into carrier bags from posh London grocer and department store Fortnum & Mason, which, amusingly, are stamped with a so-called “royal warrant” which testifies to the store’s privileged role of supplying tea to the prince.