Prince Harry has charmed and entertained the world for the past seven days as he has toured the Caribbean, a veritable riot of informaility and blue desert boots, and the Daily Mail is reporting that its all thanks to his secret adviser; his brother William, who has been texting him daily from the Falklands with tips and encouragement.
But, given the fact that Harry's tour has undoubtedly been the most succesful undertaken by a member of the British royal family since the Diana era, it might be more appropriate if William and the rest of the royal family took a few tips from the feckless younger brother miraculously morphed into international statesman.
What might Harry's top ten tips for a succesful tour look like?
Photo Illustration by the Daily Beast
Ignore all fashion advice and styling and, like a true bloke, simply buy up multiple pairs of Russell and Bromley desert boots, one in every color, when you're a bit hungover in London one morning.
Getty Images; Reuters
Drink plenty of rum and fruity cocktails and play up to your party boy image by blowing out your cheeks, mopping your brow and nodding appreciatively when knocking back the local moonshine.
Chris Jackson
Ditch the suit immediately after arriving at the airport and dress like an extra from The Beach as soon as possible.
Chris Jackson / Getty Images
Dance, dance dance. Don't worry if you look like a wally. Remember the last precedent is: your dad. Pretty well everyone looks good dancing next to Prince Charles.
Chase cool. Get away from the officials and hang out with de facto sovereigns not real ones: e.g., Rita Marley in Jamaica or, as here, India Hicks on Harbour Island.
Chris Jackson / Getty Images
Should you find yourself lining up in a race against the world's fastest man, cheat. It's an ancient British custom. Hey, you might be king one day, and it would be awkward for the other guy to beat the king. No one will mind, as long as you do the Bolt of Lightning thing with him after.
Jokingly abuse the press on a regular basis. This lets the reptiles know who's boss. And don't for a minute let that stop you commandeering their boat when your own one breaks down. They'll all think its hilarious. In fact, you could push them out the boat one by one to be eaten by crocodiles, and they'd still be writing about your cheeky sense of humour.
Wear shades, not hats, like the old farts used to.
Introduce a frisson of fear among your subjects by manning up with some light weaponry and proving that you really can shoot, they didn't fake your Apache scores and yes, you bloody well are going to go and kill some Taliban if only the suits at the Ministry of Defence will let you.
Chris Jackson / Getty Images
When making speeches, eschew tradition and tell the crowd to "make some noise." If you act like a pompous, stuck-up royal, people will assume you are one, but act like a rock star and they will treat you accordingly.
Chris Jackson / Getty Images
