OH SH*T

Someone Sent Actual Crap to All of the Ohio Senate’s GOP Members

“It’s gross and stupid, immaturity at its highest level,” one state senator fumed.

Republican members of the Ohio Senate got a smelly surprise this week: actual human feces. The excrement was intercepted on Thursday morning—before it made its way to the 25 state senators’ mailboxes—and was sent in envelopes from a Cleveland post office. A federal investigation by the U.S. Postal Inspector has since been launched. “It’s gross and stupid, immaturity at its highest level,” Republican state Sen. Jay Hottinger fumed. Ohio House spokesman John Fortney, who wasn’t sure whether House members had also been sent the putrid packages, called the unknown senders “pathetic, little cowards.” “They should’ve just sent a selfie, because it’s the same thing,” he said. “I’d be more than happy to explain it to them in a parking lot or cornfield of their choice.”