THIRSTY WORK

Trump Goon Drools Over ‘Muscular’ Trump Bringing ‘Real Masculinity’ to America

Trump picked former Fox News star Monica Crowley as his Chief of Protocol.

A top Trump goon has drooled over the president’s “muscular” and ultra-masculine approach to politics.

State Department chief of protocol Monica Crowley, a former Fox News contributor, linked up with her former employer to swoon over the aging commander-in-chief live on primetime TV.

The sickly praise comes as Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth demands fewer overweight officers and bans beards in the military, and a swath of equality rules is swept aside.

GOLDEN AGE PRESIDENT

Trump, 79, Admits He'll ‘Probably’ Fall Down Stairs One Day

Erkki Forster

“What a difference a presidency makes. We are now totally over that destructive, stupid era of toxic masculinity, and now we’re in an era of real masculinity thanks to the bold, muscular leadership of President Trump and our Secretary of War, Pete Hegseth. We saw that in bold relief yesterday. What an incredible day,” she told a giddy Jesse Watters on Monday evening.

And she’s got a point, if you ask the man himself. Trump, 79, spoke at an event marking the U.S. Navy’s 250th anniversary celebration in Norfolk, Virginia, on Sunday.

The 224 lbs president’s typically meandering speech took many turns. At one point, the president touched on his apparent physical prowess, a clear point of pride.

“A man that everybody loves, he was my doctor in the White House and I got to know him very well,” Trump began, referring to his former White House physician, Rep. Ronny Jackson. The disgraced physician once said Trump could live to 200 years old. “He was also the doctor for Barack Hussein Obama. Have you heard of him?”

He paused, waiting for a reaction, but none came. Trump, however, continued and conjured up yet another bizarre line about his health, which is constantly under the microscope because of a relentless hand bruise, chunky ankles, a wobbly walk, and a droopy mouth.

“He was a doctor for a man named Bush. And at a press conference, they asked him, ‘Who’s in the best shape, who’s the healthiest, who’s the strongest, who’s the best physical specimen of the three?’” Trump said. “That’s easy. President Donald Trump! And I said, ‘I love this guy!’”

Trump was willing to admit, however, that he is afraid of stairs—despite his apparent athleticism, strength, power, vigor, might, and robustness. His moment of introspection came as part of a trademark dig at his other predecessor, Joe Biden, 82.

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“We had a horrible, horrible president who had no clue what the hell was happening. The chances of him walking down those stairs successfully were not good,” he said. “And I have to be careful because one day I’m gonna probably fall.”

He then revealed what he apparently tells himself while walking down stairs. “I always say, ‘Walk down the steps nice and slowly.’ You ever notice? I don’t have to bop down the stairs. ‘Walk nice and slowly,’” he professed.

Trump was filmed in July stumbling on the stairs going up to Air Force One, and has also been seen struggling to walk in a straight line on multiple occasions.

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