Stephen Colbert says a much-mocked doggy fundraiser at Donald Trump’s Palm Beach resort must have tested the 79-year-old president’s cognitive skills—even though he routinely “aces” all his mental tests.
The late-night host used his opening monologue Thursday to roast the “Hero Dog Awards Gala” held at Mar-a-Lago with a bizarre 18th-century theme.
“There is one place folks are still having fun. That’s Mar-a-Lago. Last weekend, they hosted the Humane Society’s Hero Dog Awards Gala for canines who work with law enforcement,” Colbert said.
The gala was a fundraising event to support dogs who work with first responders and law enforcement.
“So, a big fancy party to celebrate hero dogs. I’m sure you’re thinking there’s going to be cute doggy decorations, maybe a poodle-shaped cake, sexualized human dog hybrids, and ball gowns,” Colbert said.
The event featured people and professional dancers wearing terrifying dog masks and elaborate aristocratic costumes, prompting social media mockery of the “MAGA furries.” California Gov. Gavin Newsom’s press office reposted images of the event on X, too, writing, “Why is Donald Trump hosting a FURRY PARTY???”
Colbert also roasted the over-the-top outfits worn by guests, “I mean, look at those fancy Rococo dresses. Reminds me of that famous Marie Antoinette quote: ‘Let them eat cake, but not chocolate.’”
Colbert said Trump eventually made it to the event.
“Of course, this being Mar-a-Lago, Trump did make an appearance, but, unfortunately, he arrived late. That’s got to be confusing for someone who already has such a tenuous grasp on reality,” Colbert said. He displayed photographs and footage of the event for the audience.
The comedian compared the event to the numerous cognitive tests—which Trump insists he always aces—that start with the identification of a series of animals. “I got to say, wow, they really upped the challenge on these cognitive tests,” Colbert said, mimicking the president as he listed the animal costumes at the party. “Dog, dog, dog, dog, giraffe. Damn it, dog.”
