HEAD OVER HEELS

Trump Thirsts Over Male Bodies at Florida Rally

The 80-year-old president was giddy about the male physique at his latest rally.

President Donald Trump found himself repeatedly distracted by male bodies at his latest rally, turning it into a bizarre appreciation session for the male form.

Trump’s fascination with the male physique has become a running joke, drawing ridicule from late-night hosts and even on Fox News shows. Yet the 80-year-old president was back to serving up more muscle commentary Friday at his rally in Fort Myers, Florida.

Trump’s first object of affection was Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr., whom he welcomed onstage with the eyebrow-raising admission that he had “watched him for half an hour on the plane.”

Kennedy stuck to his MAHA talking points in his remarks, only for Trump to take the mic back and promptly gush over the 72-year-old health secretary’s body.

“Thank you, Bobby. By the way, seriously, did anybody ever see the build? The body on Bob—did anybody ever see?” Trump swooned. “He’s got the body, he’s got the body of a 30-year-old.”

“He’s—” the president began, before seemingly catching himself and pivoting.

“But he has done an amazing job. He’s actually just like an amazing guy. Think of it, think of it. He’s a Republican, and he’s the most important Kennedy in the Kennedy family by far,” he marveled.

Less than 10 minutes passed before Trump found more men to thirst over, this time while recounting conversations with generals about the $1,776 “warrior dividend” checks sent to U.S. service members last year.

“And they came in, these three guys came in, handsome, big, strong guys, four stars, four stars, and three stars,” Trump recalled, gesturing animatedly as he reeled off the generals’ physical attributes. “‘Sir, I think we can do $1,775.’ I said, ‘Wait a minute, $1,775? You mean if I add $1, it’s $1,776?’ That’s an important name. Important term, $1,776.”

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“These guys were so good-looking. I wanted to go out immediately and make a movie because now I have my secretary of the treasury, and I have my generals all proud,” he added, referring to Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent.

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The president’s Florida thirst fest is the latest installment in a growing saga of his MAGA man-crushes. He previously thirsted after Ohio GOP Sen. Jon Husted’s physique in vulgar terms during an Oct. 17 rally in Kentucky and then again at a North Carolina rally on Tuesday.

“I’m studying his body,” Trump, 80, told the North Carolina crowd. “I’ve never studied the body of a man before; it’s not my thing. Nothing wrong with it, of course... But I looked at his a--, and then I looked at his legs... and I said his ass, it’s like a pile of muscle.”

The president’s fixation on the MAGA beefcake has drawn widespread mockery, with The Daily Show’s Michael Kosta, who called him “horny,” and frustration from Republicans who wish he would stay on message.

Calling the president’s obsession with Husted’s rear “just weird,” Republican political consultant Karl Rove told Fox News’ Brian Kilmeade on Friday, “He goes off and starts talking about the posterior of Sen. Jon Husted, and I’m thinking, what kind of a message is that?”

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