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At the Craps Tables With John McCain
How the Senator Lost it at a Puerto Rican Casino
For this entire presidential campaign, the media have been waiting for John McCain’s famous temper to explode. A few small examples have been reported without anyone trying to make a big deal about it. The rule seems to be that if he can keep it bottled until November 5, he’s home free. But if he explodes in the interim, it becomes an official issue. This isn’t completely nuts. If he can’t hold it in for just the few months he is under maximum scrutiny, then he has a real problem. Otherwise, hey—Bill Clinton also had a temper, it was said, along with other uncontrollable passions.
Until recently this anger business didn’t bother me much. There is a lot to be angry about. Furthermore, I was not confident that McCain’s anger passed the whose-ox-is-gored test: As an Obama supporter, would I be equally alarmed if my preferred candidate had anger issues? (Which some folks say he does, by the way.) Then I heard the following story.
“DON’T TOUCH ME,” he repeated viciously. “DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO?”
It comes in an email from my friend Jeff Dearth, a media investment banker and former publisher of The New Republic. We also went to junior high and high school together in Michigan. He would not make this up. In 2005, Jeff attended a magazine industry conference at a casino hotel in Puerto Rico. (I was there, too, though not a witness to what follows.) The guest speaker was McCain. He put on a terrific performance, breaking up the friendly crowd by referring to journalists as “my base.” (To anyone who remembers this period in McCain’s history, his attempt this year to paint Barack Obama as Britney Spears or Paris Hilton because Obama is now the media darling seems especially cheap.)
McCain’s game is craps. So is Jeff Dearth’s. Jeff was at the table when McCain showed up and happily made room for him. Apparently there is some kind of rule or tradition in craps that everyone’s hands are supposed to be above the table when the dice are about to be thrown. McCain—“very likely distracted by one of the many people who approached him that evening,” Jeff says charitably—apparently was violating this rule. A small middle-aged woman at the table, apparently a “regular,” reached out and pulled McCain’s arm away. I’ll let Jeff take over the story:
“McCain immediately turned to the woman and said between clenched teeth: ‘DON’T TOUCH ME.’ The woman started to explain...McCain interrupted her: ‘DON’T TOUCH ME,’ he repeated viciously. The woman again tried to explain. ‘DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO?’ McCain continued, his voice rising and his hands now raised in the ‘bring it on’ position. He was red-faced. By this time all the action at the table had stopped. I was completely shocked. McCain had totally lost it, and in the space of about ten seconds. ‘Sir, you must be courteous to the other players at the table,’ the pit boss said to McCain. “DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? ASK ANYBODY AROUND HERE WHO I AM.”
This being Puerto Rico, the pit boss might not have known McCain. But the senator continued in full fury—“DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO? DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?”—and crisis was avoided only when Jeff offered to change places and stand between McCain and the woman who had touched his arm.
What is bothersome about this story, if it’s true, is only partly the explosive anger. More, it’s the arrogance. At the craps table, who cares who he is? And there’s the recklessness of such a performance in a casino full of journalists (unless McCain absolutely couldn’t control himself, which is even scarier). But this gamble paid off. Although there were published reports that McCain had gambled late into the night, which properly treated that matter as charming, this particular episode has gone unreported until now. Maybe no journalist saw it. Or maybe this illustrates the unwritten rule of political journalism that all human-interest anecdotes must reaffirm a previously established belief. Arrogance is something McCain is not known for. Quite the opposite. Logic might dictate that an anecdote showing that, say, Obama has webbed feet would be more interesting than one showing that he is a skinny guy with big ears. But that’s not how it works.
Jeff Dearth is not an extreme partisan or an activist for either candidate. He supports Obama, in part because he is truly alarmed at the thought of the arrogant hothead he saw becoming president. (“I’d happily gamble with Senator McCain again,” he says, “but I definitely wouldn’t gamble on him.”) It alarms me, too. John McCain is the best Republican presidential candidate of my lifetime. But a performance like this would give me pause about supporting a candidate of either party.
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I read the article this morning along with Tim Dickinson's McCain piece in Rolling Stone. The terrible temper and silly arrogance, along with my own concern about why an elderly man who has had three or four malignant melanomas feels compelled to run for President...is he really the best the Republican can offer America, and the world?
Is it possible McCain is especially sensitive about having his arm(s) grabbed because of lingering discomfort and pain he deals with from the permanent damage they suffered during his capture and captivity in Vietnam?
I call BS.
Amazing how an Obama supporter comes out with this second hand story with less than a month left. I'm quite sure McCain didn't "loose it" on a casino floor and scream at a woman in the middle of the floor. And he is not physically able to lift his ams in the "bring it" pose. I don't doubt that he asked the woman to refrain from touching him but I am sure this little story is blown completely out of proportion.
Not known for his arrogance? McCain's body language during the televised "town hall" debate telegraphed his arrogance. Example: at the end of each of his comments during the foreign policy segment, McCain opened the hand holding the microphone and let it slip (drop) into his other hand, poised directly below to "catch" it. Punctuation mark. "So there. Take that," it seemed to say.
The font size on this story/site is much to small. Sadly, I'll have to withdraw my a/c.
Judy
I never paid much attention to John McCain until this election.His arrogance and sense of entitlement are staggering. I find both he and his running mate to be truly scary.
Can you say EMBELLISHMENT!I'm sorry Michael, no doubt this tale has grown leaps & bounds these past years. I'm not even a McCain supporter and the whole episode sounds ridiculous & overblown......your friend Jeff seems to have let his imagination get away from him.
I am a Naval Academy graduate and a Vietnam veteran as is John McCain. His survival through years of torture at the "Hanoi Hilton" is remarkable but cannot have been accomplished without leaving physical and mental scars. The anger and apparent dislike of being touched may be indication of some of those scars. Although the "Manchurian Candidate" may be an inaccurate analogy, the pure stubborness which has helped Senator McCain through his trials in his past may not be a good thing for a president in this New World.
i agree
I don't like the idea what McCain did at all but everyone has to remember what he went through in Vietnam. When that woman reached out to him like that a touched him all of what he went through came back.
I know he repeated "Do you know who I am?" but that was all part of what he went through. A lot of people have bad tempers but he was not a tough person he couldn't go through what he went through and that is a fact.
The reason why I know what I am speaking about is I have been there and did some things I wish I could take back. I was abused by my brother-in-law better known as rape for nine years starting at the age of twelve and it didn't stop until I was twenty-one. I lost many a job because of bad temper and when someone would touch me I would go off the walls. Because I would feel invaded again until I got a lot of help and even to this day I don't like it but I don't feel as bad. I just don't like it because I don't feel I have the power to stop it and if I am tired or just not thinking I will recoil and demand that person to stop touching me.
I lost many many a job because of what happened to me because someone would say something to me simular to what he would say and I would either completely lose my temper or just sit there in absolute quiet depending on the day.
You can still see that he has a lot of problems with what happened to him but I think that he has really risen above a lot of things.
There is an old saying "Those who live in glass houses should never throw stones". Think about that and just maybe everyone will settle down.
MAY GOD BE WITH MCCAIN AND HIS ENTIRE FAMILY NOW AND FOREVER AS I AM SURE HE WILL!!!
I agree Jerry. Another attempt to show McCain as out of touch and unstable. I'm tired of the media being so bias and ignoring the bad points about Obama, then reporting the most meaning less junk on the Clintons and McCain. It's deploreable.
I hate "hear say" stories and as much as I detest John McCain's political character attacks on Barack Obama, I find this story to hard to believe.
In McCain's defense (words I never imagined myself writing) I can imagine that because of his war injuries he's very sensitive to having strangers tugging on his arms.
I should start by saying that I don't think McCain is fit to be president. There are many examples of his lack of judgment--his choice of running mate, just to name one. However, when I read this story, I read it in a very different light. I have post-traumatic stress disorder, and having someone come up from behind grab you is a classic trigger for a PTSD explosion. I would be indeed surprised if McCain, after his wartime experiences, didn't have PTSD. (And, of course, we can't talk about the pain McCain experienced without also talking about the enormous pain he inflicted on Vietnamese people as a bomber pilot.) Read in this light, his statement, "Do you know who I am?" seems less a sign of his arrogance and more an attempt to orient himself in the here and now--i.e., "I'm not in a prisoner of war camp anymore, I'm now a senator."
I think it is a shame that both candidates, their parties, and supporters focus more on mud slinging than they do the serious issues. I have no doubt that as human beings both of these individuals have lost their temper and acted irrational from time to time. We as readers, and not witnesses of this particular episode don't know all of the details of the situation described. I have to ask myself "if the man writing this proclaims to be an Obama supporter and the source of the story is also, then how much is it blown out of proportion?"
For all we know the little old lady while meaning no harm, in her haste to keep the game going may have pulled a little harder and faster than the witness mentioned, causing a so called Knee jerk reaction, or painful reflex. It is fairly obvious to anyone who has spent 2 minutes watching McCain on TV that he no longer enjoys the full range of motion in his arms and shoulders that the average person does. I do not know his personality,I do not personally know his temper. However I can speak from my own experience as a person who suffers from degenerative disc disease that sometimes unexpected jolts even from a innocent fun seeking child can cause an otherwise calm individual to lash out in a quick fit that you will spend the rest of the day ashamed of how you reacted. Thankfully I am not under the scrutiny of millions of people that are trying to dig up dirt to discredit me for an election of the most important political positions in America.
Would any of us want such a hothead to have control of our nuclear arsenal? I do not think so. Temper tantrums in adults constitute an ultimate form of narcissism and abuse. So for any thinking person, to vote the combination of this unprincipled volatile old man and the vindictive airhead who fancies herself to be an energy expert that was chosen to be his running mate is simply out of the question.
Anyone who has lived with someone who has this kind of arrogance and rage knows exactly how true this story rings.
Sorry, I know some of us want to relegate this to mud slinging, and pretend it doesn't matter, but, if you've ever lived through it, you know it does matter.
People who feel entitled to give in to these kinds of rages, which is a really extreme form of bullying, do not take into consideration the effect they have on others. Because they don't care. At the moment of rage, they feel completely entitled to abuse whoever is around them, at whatever cost.
The way you can tell they feel entitled to use their rage to bully and manipulate others is in the fact that, although they seem to be losing control when they fly into a rage, they still have enough control to only do it to certain people or under certain conditions. They seem to have enough control not to do it when it will damage them, but only when they can hurt others with impunity.
McCain fits the pattern. These stories have followed him for decades, in both his personal and professional life, yet he manages to keep control in front of the cameras, which implies a level of choice, or control.
He can be very charming, also not unusual in someone who does this. But those closest never know which they'll get - the charm or the abuse. It's a great manipulating skill, but hell on those who have to live with it.
Dear Senator McCain:
We know who you are.
That is why you will never be president.
There are numerous tapes of McCain losing his temper, yelling and swearing violently so I have no trouble at all believing this story. Many are on YouTube so feel free to check them out if you are skeptical.
I saw one of him yelling and swearing in a Senate hearing to the witness giving testimony; very profane and angry. (If we had tape like this on Barack Obama the race would be over.)
Another thing; all of the screaming temper events that I have seen tape on have been at women (although he also yells and swears at men).
If you don't believe this story, please look up the tapes on YouTube and judge for yourself.
But this is the point, sure he may suffer from PSTD, that is reason why he make NOT be qualified to be President. My husband fought in action for 13 months in Vietnam and saw more action that McCain could ever make up. But he did get captured, most of his injuries was from the crashing of the plane not the Viet Congs. They just didn't treat him and once they found out who his father was, he was not tortured. I suffer from Depression and my Doctor always excuse me from Jury Duty. Face it, sometimes people with certain conditions shouldn't serve in certain capacities. Since McCain love to go towar, it hard for me to imagine him staying calm when engaged in a conversation with a leader he doesn't like.
Talking a damaging American image with Allies, this is too crucial to ignore and to risk.
This (and Tim Dickinson's McCain fine, extensive article!) is why I feel that Joe Biden's awfulest gaff is the one he repeats over, and over, and over, without end:
"John McCain is my very old and dear friend, an undisputed war hero, a great man, and I LOVE HIM!"
Disgusting.
Hurtful, too. It gives some us actual PAIN to hear Biden keep on saying that, and saying it, and saying it. Even ONCE is repulsive and is TOO much.
So stop it, Senator Biden. JUST STOP IT.
(Biden was my pick during the earlier days of the nomonation process, although... admittedly... back then, I had not heard of his "gaff" regarding Dennis Kucinich's wife. I think VERY VERY VERY HIGHLY of Congressman Kucinich. A hell of a lot more than I think of Joe Biden's beloved Senator Crash "Do You Know Who I Am!?" McNasty, for whom I have nothing but a soul-deep, permanent disregard. McCain represents many vile things to me, but especially, he is the Face of 4,000 shattered families, and countless more wounded, disfigured, crippled, destroyed Americans, far more Americans LOST than those we lost on 9-11. John McCain is a stupid, vain, hateful man, no hero of mine. Millions feel exactly as I do! He will never say "Joe Biden is my great friend and I love him.")
Carly
Soldier's mom
ex-Republican
(Obama/Biden '08)
Don't make John McCain angry... you wouldn't like him when he's angry.
http://www.leftfair.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/mccain-angry.jpg
FULL DISCLOSURE -- I once worked with Mike Kinsley and Jeff Dearth at the New Republic. I have not, however, had contact with either of them in years. I am an Obama supporter.
That said: A friend told me this story in 2005 as it had been related to him by someone (other than Jeff Dearth) who was also in the casino that evening and observed McCain's behavior. I understand that the friend was contacted about this story but didn't want to confirm -- he's a McCain supporter. The story stuck in my mind because of a Boston Globe story during the 2004 campaign about Sen. Kerry moving to the head of a line for a concert in Boston,and on being challenged, answered, "Don't you know who I am?"
I suppose that the arrogance comes with the position, but the volatility and the anger make me anxious about McCain given his seeming eagerness to use military force.
It doesn't take much research on the InterWebs to see a pattern emerging here. Does anyone else have additional info to support the apparent rage history?
"The way you can tell they feel entitled to use their rage to bully and
manipulate others is in the fact that, although they seem to be losing
control when they fly into a rage, they still have enough control to only
do it to certain people or under certain conditions. They seem to have
enough control not to do it when it will damage them, but only when they
can hurt others with impunity."
EXACTAMUNDO! You have described two very close members of my family circle, a parent, and a spouse. This may be why McCain sets me off to such extremes. I am simply unable to tolerate him PERIOD. I know EXACTLY what he is.
Thank you.
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