On Thursday night, Desus & Mero—the most underrated and underappreciated hosts in late-night—took aim at Ben Shapiro, the shrill editor of The Daily Wire who once tweeted of Barack Obama, “Colin Powell was an affirmative action general. No surprise he’s supporting an affirmative action president.”
Shapiro’s performative rant about “WAP,” the new single by Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion (translating to “Wet-Ass Pussy”), went viral this week, owing to the diminutive right-wing pundit reciting the lyrics in his self-described “nasal whine of a voice.”
After playing footage of Shapiro’s stunt, Desus & Mero couldn’t contain their laughter.
“He talks like the head person of the Lollipop Guild. There’s no way a grown man could have a voice that high,” said Desus, adding, “His natural speaking voice is what it sounds like when you listen to a podcast at 4x the speed.”
“We once had the chopped cheese from Whole Foods, and what it tasted like is what he sounds like. There’s no soul, there’s no cadence, there’s no rhythm,” he continued. “Damn. He makes Jeremy Renner sound like B.B. King,” chimed in Mero.
After airing more footage of Shapiro reading “WAP” lyrics—e.g. “Beat it up N-word, catch a charge, put this P-word right in your face, swipe your nose like a credit card, spit in my mouth, look in my eyes, this P-word is wet, come take a dive”—Desus exclaimed, “The newest single on KIDZ BOP For Incels!”
“He’s looking at this shit like, damn, how come I’ve never had this shit done to me? It’s cause you’re A FUCKIN’ NERD, BEN!” offered Mero.
They then accused Shapiro, who has a history of racist tweets, of saying “the N-word” in his private life.
“Ben needs to stop playin’ like he doesn’t say the N-word—allegedly,” cracked Desus. “Yeah, stop playin’ dog,” said Mero. “You know you say that shit to your pillow every night.”