LONDON — Like most right-thinking Americans, Lindsay Lohan has very little idea what the hell is going on with Brexit.
Unlike most Americans, she is giving it a damn good go.
As Britain’s Twitter users descend into despair amid signs that the older voters have plunged the country’s future into chaos with a vote to quit the European Union, Lohan’s full-throated embrace of the campaign has emerged as one of the night’s highlights.
It began happily enough, with Lohan telling the people of Sunderland, a small northeastern city, to buy haute couture and vote Remain.
It’s not entirely clear what she meant, but she wasn’t happy that Sunderland had failed to heed her wisdom.
Then it turned out she didn’t even know where Sunderland was.
There was some good news for the campaign to Remain in the EU from the remote Shetland Islands north of Scotland.
But Lohan’s torment soon continued.
“Kettering where are you?” A reasonable question—no one in Britain knows either.
By now the pound was collapsing at a rate not seen since the 2008 crash.
Panic set in, and there was nothing left to do but invoke a minor deity:
By now as many people seemed to be following Lohan’s freakout as were selling sterling hand over fist.
She wanted to assure us that, yes, this was a 100 percent real meltdown.