CONSCIOUS COUPLING

Nepo Baby of the Week: ‘Kylée’ Is Our Next Delightfully Strange Power Couple

This week’s stand-out nepo baby is Kylie Jenner, whose controversial new BF is actually an extremely good publicity move for them both. Go, Team Kylée!

This past week, I discovered the extent to which the internet has developed a parasocial relationship with one Timothée Chalamet, following somewhat surprising rumors that he’s dating notorious nepo baby and Flat Tummy Tea promoter Kylie Jenner.

After several Deuxmoi tips and a photo of Jenner’s SUV parked at the Dune star’s home, sources (*coughs* Kris Jenner) finally confirmed their “casual romance” to Entertainment Tonight. And my Twitter feed has been throwing a collective tantrum ever since.

As someone who gawks at celebrities for a living, I have to admit that I’m a bit shocked by the overwhelmingly negative response to this pairing. The past two years in celebrity dating news have primed the internet for total chaos, from Bennifer 2.0 to Harry Styles and Olivia Wilde. Even if we weren’t outrightly stanning these pairings, we appreciated the humor and wackiness they brought to the news cycle.

However, there’s something about Chalamet cozying up to a Kardashian that social media can’t seem to digest. And now I’m forced to defend Jenner’s right to bone an Oscar nominee!

The Kylée news has brought on plenty of jokes, including some very funny memes about their glaring differences in size. Mostly, though, everyone seems either skeptical, disappointed, or even outraged that these two fashionable twentysomethings would interact. Specifically, there’s a narrative on Twitter that Chalamet and Jenner’s romance is a total PR stunt, primarily on Jenner’s part. Some users suspect that these headlines are bait to get people to watch the upcoming season of Hulu’s The Kardashians, which no one seems that excited for.

To this I say, thank you for reiterating the most commonly stated opinion about the Kardashian-Jenner family! These women are thirsty for attention! Not only were these accusations made when Kim Kardashian stepped out with Pete Davidson for the first time, but they’ve been uttered for the past decade, since they first took over Tinseltown. It’s not that these claims of seeking press are necessarily false. Clearly, one of the most powerful families in the world would want to remain relevant. They’re just reductive and boring.

The thing is, the Kardashians are constantly selling things, whether it be makeup, clothing, or their excruciatingly dull reality show. They’re also going to continue dating celebrities, because those are the people they surround themselves with. It’s also what the majority of public-facing people do. Of course there’s going to be an overlap in whatever chaotic event is occurring in the Kardashians’ personal lives and a new product they’re advertising. But this doesn’t mean that their interest in partners and staying relevant are mutually exclusive.

I’ve also sensed the underlying suggestion from Chalamet fans that the Little Women actor is, in fact, “too good” to court Jenner. This isn’t surprising, given that Chalamet is considered a sensitive, intellectual artist, while Jenner is largely known as a vapid Instagram model. Is Chalamet generally more respected in Hollywood and pop culture at large? Yes. Does he offer more valuable products to the world than the Kardashian-Jenner family does? I guess. Does that mean that he and Jenner have absolutely nothing in common? Not really!

In fact, this whole ordeal makes perfect sense, given the Bones and All star’s romantic history with famous people’s relatives. He famously dated Madonna’s eldest daughter, Lourdes Leon, when they attended the prestigious Fiorello H. LaGuardia High School of Music & Art and Performing Arts. He also dated nepo baby du jour Lily-Rose Depp. Still, the actor has yet to have a real “star couple” moment, a base-level requirement for any Hollywood heartthrob.

And if you’re wondering what Chalamet and Jenner could possibly converse about, let me remind you of Jenner’s film-bro home decor. At the very least, they can bond over consistently serving lewks.

LET’S GET COOKIN’

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Kyndall Cunningham

Regardless of whether these two have any sort of chemistry, the image of Hollywood’s beloved twink dating the face of the BBL movement is inherently hilarious, maybe even cute. I posit that, while the world is burning, we all embrace the ridiculousness of Jenner and Chalamet.

Kyndall Cunningham

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