Nicole Kidman says she is facing the future with an “open heart” as she continues to process her split from Keith Urban after 19 years of marriage.
The Australian actress opened up to British Vogue about the end of her marriage to the New Zealand-born country singer, whom she filed to divorce last September.
The 59-year-old spoke candidly about how her plans have changed.
“I had a different view of what my life was going to be, but this is what it is now,” Kidman said. “You make all these plans and you have all these ideas of what it’s all going to be like and then it’s… not. You have to adjust. You adapt. The future, it’s completely unknown to me right now.”
As far as divorces go, Kidman and Urban’s seemed drama-free. They parted ways citing irreconcilable differences but agreed to shared custody of their two children, Sunday Rose, 18, and Faith Margaret, 15. They didn’t go to court and neither of them would be required to pay spousal support.
Kidman said she is still processing the split, which she says sometimes surprises people.
“I don’t overthink things and I’m probably not that analytical. I’m far more feeling-centred and I lead with my heart. I just go, ‘OK, what do I feel here? I’ll give it a go.’ It throws people, because I think they think I’ll be far more measured and I’m not.”
When asked if the change is scary, Kidman said there was a point when she was “very fearful” but decided to “just go forward with an enormous amount of hope.”
She credits her resilience to older women in her life who serve as mentors.
“I know my character. I know my talent. I know who I am,” she said. “If I make a mistake and it doesn’t connect, or something goes wrong in my life where it’s humiliating, it’s OK. Other people have had that and that’s OK. Take the onus off it.”
Before Urban, Kidman was married to Tom Cruise for 11 years, with the couple adopting two children, Isabella, now 33, and Connor, 31.
The two wed when Kidman was 23 and she remembers being so infatuated with her “huge movie star husband” she was willing to “throw my career away.”
“We just fell madly in love and it was that simple. I remember people saying to me, ‘OK, well this is really going to affect your career.’ I’m like, ‘I don’t care. I’m in love. I want to be married.”
Despite having experienced one highly scrutinized breakup before, Kidman said navigating heartbreak never gets familiar. “It’s all new... Every time!”
