Jimmy Kimmel can’t fathom why President Donald Trump feels the need to boast about taking multiple cognitive tests.
At a National Memorial Day Parade on Monday, the president went on “his classic ‘I’m-smart-because-I-aced-a-test-they-give-victims-of-head-injuries’ routine,” Kimmel said on Tuesday night.
At the event, Trump told the crowd, “So the first question was you have a bear, a snake, an elephant, and a horse. Name the horse. That’s the horse.”
The 79-year-old president often recites this anecdote, listing a different group of animals each time.
“But toward the end, like, they had a question like ‘Pick a number, sir, any number.’ OK. 203. Multiply times 9, divide by 2, add on 1324, subtract 1292. ‘Sir, multiply it out one more time by 19. What is the answer, sir?’ And I got it right.”
After Trump’s rambling replay of the test was played for Kimmel’s live audience, the ABC host mocked the president, saying, “He’s mommy’s smartest little boy. I’m so proud of him. He got it right.”
“This test that he’s bragging about is called the Montreal Cognitive Test,” Kimmel explained. “First of all, it’s incredibly easy. I took it myself. I got a perfect score. No problem. And second, there are no equations on this test. There’s no multiplication. There’s no division. He’s making that up. Even his lies are lies.”
The late-night host, who regularly spars with Trump, posited that Trump is “very sensitive about the idea that he’s losing it mentally because that’s what he kept saying about Joe Biden.”
“And he’s sensitive about the idea that he is physically unfit as well. He got another physical today,” continued Kimmel. “It’s his third examination in a little over a year. Do you think when they do these, he knows he’s going to the hospital? Or is it like when you trick your dog into going to the vet?”
“Trump says there’s nothing wrong with him. The reason he went in is because the doctor said, ‘Sir, please come in for another exam so we may gaze upon your chiseled body and plump, delectable testicles.’”
The president’s boasts about “acing” cognitive tests are nearly constant, occurring at various events during which Trump goes on tangents about his mental abilities.
