The New York Post is either on to something, or they’re incredibly determined to break up the biggest marriage in music. In the wake of Solange’s viral elevator smackdown on Jay Z, the tabloid media—and the Post, in particular—has lost whatever marbles they had left trying to piece together why it happened.
Exactly one week ago, the Post ran a piece headlined “Could This Be the End of Beyoncé and Jay Z?” that quoted a (dubious) source as saying, “They are trying to figure out a way to split without divorcing… This is a huge concert tour and they’ve already gotten most of the money from the promoters up front.” That tour, of course, is the On the Run tour featuring Beyoncé and Jay Z, which is on track to rake in up to $100 million.
On Saturday night, the Post doubled-down on their claims with a longer hit piece titled, “Inside the Crumbling Marriage of Jay Z and Beyoncé.”
“This is the first peek behind the firewall that is Beyonce and Jay Z Inc.—what drew them together, why they’re headed for a split and why love was never the thing that held them together,” says the (speculative) piece.
Below are the wildest claims from the New York Post’s latest tour de force.
Queen B Took Convincing
According to the New York Post, Jay Z was in hot pursuit of Beyoncé, but she wasn’t that into him. “She told me she wasn’t too fond of him… I guess she wasn’t attracted to him,” the piece quotes her uncle as saying. The piece also alludes to Beyoncé possibly being “a virgin” when they met, and that she was “most interested in Jay’s mind,” writing, “Jay’s a kingmaker; she recognized that. This was a come-up for her, no question. She had to learn the ropes as presented by Jay—but really, this was mostly about business.”
The Open Relationship
This should be taken with a serious grain of salt, but the Post piece quotes a source as saying that Jay Z and Beyoncé had an open relationship: “As for dating others, he says, ‘they each had guilty pleasures.’”
Jay Z Is “Controlling”
This is no secret, but Beyoncé’s now-estranged father, Matthew Knowles, is described as a “drill sergeant” who “made the girls work hours a day, seven days a week.” But the piece also claims that Jay Z is controlling as well, writing, “Beyoncé had gone from one man to another, never truly being on her own,” and adding, “There’s no bigger controller than Jay Z.”
Girlhood, Starring Beyoncé?
Critics are going gaga (and rightfully so) for Richard Linklater’s Boyhood, filmed over 12 years and chronicling the maturation of a young boy into a young man. According to the piece, Beyonce “has spent every single day since 2005 being trailed by her own personal camera crew, which documents each waking moment of her life” and that she stores the tapes “in a climate-controlled warehouse based on the NBC library.”
They’re Basically Secret Agents
In a piece full of dubious claims, one of the more dubious ones is that Beyoncé only “gives any real love” to her sister, Solange, and ex-Destiny’s Child members Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams, but that they “can’t even swing by without getting clearance first.” The piece also claims that “Beyoncé and Jay Z both change their cellphone numbers every two weeks.”
Why Jay Z and Beyoncé Bailed on the Kimye Wedding
The piece quotes a source claiming that they failed to attend the glitzy Kanye West and Kim Kardashian wedding in Italy because it was “too low-rent” for the couple’s celebrity brand. “They are guarding like hell their status,” the piece says. “Beyoncé wasn’t going to allow a Kardashian to socially climb her. And Jay didn’t want Kanye with Kim—he thinks it’s bad for business. I think Jay lost a little respect for Kanye there.”
What That Solange/Jay Z Elevator Melee Was About
The Post quotes a source claiming that the viral video of Bey’s little sister, Solange, going MMA on Jay Z in an elevator after the Met Ball was “really over Jay’s protégé Rihanna, who he allegedly planned to meet later that night at his 40/40 club.” The piece quotes the source as saying, “Solange was like, ‘Enough is enough—you must be [screwing] Rihanna.’”
Is It Really Over?
The Post quotes their “source” as saying that “the only time Jay and Beyoncé are really together is on stage,” that they’re “allegedly traveling with marriage counselors,” and that Jay “spends much of his time on the phone, tending to business.”