There’s nothing the internet loves more than an absolute shit show, and this week, a cartoonishly under-realized “immersive event” affiliated with the Timothée Chalamet Wonka film, located in bleak, industrial Scotland—truly, the setting couldn't have been more perfect—delivered the goods, and then some.
Ticket buyers expecting Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory wonderland were outraged—some to the point of calling the authorities—by what they got instead, which was reportedly a shambolic warehouse staged with minimal, creepy props.
Responsibility lies with the event company House of Illuminati, which issued what is technically its second formal apology for the fiasco in a statement on Facebook on Friday.
Last Saturday, Illuminati posted, also on Facebook, that they “fully apologize for what has happened and will be giving full refunds to each and every person that purchased tickets,” but the statement has since been removed.
“I want to extend my sincerest apologies to each and every one of you who was looking forward to this event,” the latest Facebook post from House of Illuminati reads. “I understand the disappointment and frustration this has caused, and for that, I am truly sorry.”
(The individual behind the post goes unnamed.)
“It’s important for me to clarify that the organization and decisions surrounding this event were solely my responsibility,” the post continues. “I want to make it clear that anyone who was hired externally or offered their help, are not affiliated with the me or the company, any use of faces can cause serious harm to those who did not have any involvement in the making of this event.”
“Regarding a personal matter, there will be no wedding, and no wedding was funded by the ticket sales,” the post continues further, sans context. “This is a difficult time for me, and I ask for your understanding and privacy.”
“Wedding? What Wedding?” one commenter queried.
The baleful melancholy behind House of Illuminati’s latest mea culpa matches the tone of an apology made by one of the performers cast in the “experience.”
Paul Connell, who played Wonka, told Good Morning Scotland that he felt for “people who were expecting a magical chocolate experience and got me in a top hat in a dirty warehouse in Glasgow.”
The woman who quickly became a much-shared meme for her sad Oompa Loompa photo was similarly baffled by the experience, telling Vulture, “Obviously, because it’s such an ugly photo, people were commenting on it and saying I look ugly or like a meth head. I found the negative comments really hard, but I do see the funny side of it. I know I’m all-right looking.”
However, the Wonka Experience does have one supporter: con artist Billy McFarland, the creator of Fyre Fest, who told TMZ he’d love to give the Wonka organizers a second chance at getting things right at Fyre Fest II.