FEELING SHEEPISH

Army Cadets Steal Wrong Goat in Botched Pre-Game Navy Mascot Raid

Cadets have stolen the goat mascots, all named Bill, at least 10 times since the first raid in 1953.

In the latest episode of a decades-long tradition, Army cadets from West Point military academy snuck into a secret farmyard compound this weekend to steal the mascot of the Naval Academy—a goat named Bill—to undermine preparations for the imminent Army-Navy football game. However, as they only discovered after they had relocated the beast, the cadets somehow managed to steal the wrong goat. The New York Times first reported the botched mission, explaining that Army cadets have stolen the goat mascots, all named Bill, at least 10 times since the first raid in 1953. This weekend, under cover of darkness, the cadets did apprehend a goat named Bill—but it was the retired 35th Bill, not the incumbent 37th Bill. The older goat was described by the Times as “an arthritic, 14-year-old retiree with only one horn.” Bill the 35th was sheepishly returned on Monday, the Army told the newspaper, and a vet confirmed he was unharmed by the theft. The game will be played on Dec. 11.