Opinion

Cartoon: Dems Choose Zoom Over Gloom

INTERVENTION

Four nights and ten cartoons later, Bob Eckstein, err, paints a picture of the convention that was.

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Bob Eckstein

The Democratic National Convention just concluded the most inspiring, vulnerable and exhausting Zoom meeting of all time. 

Like a fitting room with mirrors on every side, we stood naked, forced to see all the ugliness and beauty of our nation, for four evenings straight. 

The world’s largest intervention (“I’m not a racist! Ask your aunt… Am I racist?”) ended like every intervention ends, in a nationwide tearful hug, starry-eyed hope and a bunch of insane tweets.

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The first night of the Democratic National Convention felt a little like a telethon featuring a Sarah McLachlan music video: a very kind, very sweet, very Canadian push to find a cure, not for the virus but for The Donald. After hearing so many hard-working Americans pour their heart out about what they want for our country, one thing was clear: there’s a reason that baseball broadcasts are now using cheer tracks. Canned applause to bolster the living room clapping would have gone a long way.

A touching montage, showing Joe’s propensity to hug, was a reminder that he’s had to campaign while social distancing from six feet. Bernie Sanders’ stump speech, delivered before a wall of wood, sparked a fire, but it was Michelle Obama who provided the crescendo of the night. Exercising restraint, she said, “He is clearly in over his head. He cannot meet this moment” (What a tool). 

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“It is what it is” [It’s a shitstorm, people] Michelle said as he made a plea to America to get out to vote because, “If you think that things can’t get worse, they can and they will.” [We as a country are heaving into a paper bag. Want our whole country to be like Florida?

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Tuesday night featured a pre-taped Bill Clinton speaking remotely and, for the first time ever, briefly. 

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That was followed by the first compelling roll call in convention history. 

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It was an illustration of how diverse and beautiful the country is and how much we’ve all been cooped up.

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This portion of the evening lasted roughly 16 hours.

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The bulk of the evening was a minor key dirge, about gun violence, the racial divide, immigration and the pandemic.

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Yet Wednesday had the highest ratings (with Thursday still unknown) because, as the saying goes, “Give the people what they want,” and America wanted to hear from Senator Kamala Harris and President Barack Obama.

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Home stretch. MC Julia Louis-Dreyfus served up a jolting juxtaposition of comedy and gut-wrenching segments, sort of like the current administration.

Meanwhile, the president told Hannity he could only watch a little of the convention, though he did take the bait once again and tweet at Mike Bloomberg, of all people, who got five minutes of speaking time out of his billion-dollar run, and then a second one in the middle of Biden’s speech, about how it was “just words.” Fact check: True.

The final night felt like a repeat of Jill Biden’s story on Night Two, except this time we were all on a date with Joe.

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