MASTER ILLUSIONIST

Cartoon: What a Super-Spreader Convention!

Lou Holtz asked America, “Can you imagine if President Trump didn’t show up in 2016?” Truly, not a day goes by that our country doesn’t ask that question.

opinion

With the aid of a live—at least for now—audience, Donald Trump energized the faithful this week with a revival of this country’s fear of socialism and the horror that would be a Biden America, making every American forget there ever was murder hornets. 

Most importantly he proved he really can assemble a better team (a better TV production team, that is) to create a compelling and convincing work of fiction. Almost every speech, every takeaway claimed to show America the real Trump behind the curtain, the one we don’t see, the caring and humane Trump, as if showing us how the magician pulled off the trick.

And, like a magician sawing a woman in half and then just calling it a day, many of the speakers—very much including members of the Trump family—divided, rather than united, the country.   

Night One: The president appeared earlier in the evening before the Open Mic began and met his supporters in a room to illustrate his warmth and show he is an Average Joe while Biden is a Below Average Joe. The evening ended with a Sopranos go-to-black ending.

Night Two: To hammer home the magician metaphor… David Blaine and Criss Angel? Hacks. Penn and Teller? Amateurs.

We are truly in the presence of a master illusionist. God bless these United States. God bless the hard-working Americans, the automobiles and the lobsters.

Night Three: From the pulpit, we heard sermons on women’s advancement (good), abortion (bad), socialism (bad) and, of course, football (excellent). Retired coach Lou Holtz asked America, “Can you imagine if President Trump didn’t show up in 2016?” Truly, not a day goes by that our country doesn’t ask that question. 

Kellyanne Conway stood before us, perhaps for the last time in her capacity as adviser to the president, to say that Trump empowers women to make their own choices. No word though regarding women’s choices in respect to their own bodies.

Vice President Pence ended the evening by warning the country that our future is at stake if we vote for Biden. Just then, President Trump photo-bombed the event to get in on the cheers of the live crowd and remind everyone how ironic that warning was.

Night Four: The final night saw the completion of the resurrection of President Donald Trump’s personality from creep to saint. The convention ended the same way the Bible says the Last Supper ended: With an amazing display of fireworks that was financed with taxpayer’s money. God bless America. God bless this country. God help us. 

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Bob Eckstein

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